Tread Carefully For Memories Claimed My Soul
by elmjuniper
Summary: Keeland Mahariel hates shems, now she's stuck with a whole band of them battling the darkspawn, but what happens when Keeland falls for a certain bard? Chapter 23 up:Love hurts when you do it right. FemPC/Leliana FEMSLASH
1. Embers of impressions

**DISCLAIMER:** BioWare owns everything Dragon Age-ish, all the characters, names and such except for Keeland who is my own creation born several years before Dragon Age: Origins came about. This is merely a fan fiction – my way of showing my appreciation and having some fun at the same time. ;)

**A/N:** This is my absolutely first fan fiction ever, but all criticism is more than welcome as I would love to improve my writing skills and be able to capture all the character's essences better (that is perhaps something one can't learn, but pointers are always welcome!).

Also, so far the piece is rated T – might become M later on. And the story diverges slightly from the game (I think). This is ultimately FemPC/Leliana fic – so yeah, femslash! And it's not really Alistair friendly…

Enjoy!

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LELIANA EYED THE ODD GROUP OF people going about their business at the small camp. There was the male warden Alistair who sometimes reminded her of her old puppy. He was endearing and sweet in that way, and very trusting. At times a little too trusting for his own good. A little farther on the side sat the sharp-tongued witch Morrigan, preparing her potions. Then there was the grimfaced, tall quanari Sten who seemed to follow Keeland, their leader, with a doubtful, stern gaze whenever she did something. Next to him sat an older looking woman, Wynne, one of the few who had survived the battle at Ostagar. She looked weary and tired, but seemed determined to not let it show, though Leliana could see it. If it was one thing she had learned from her years working as a bard in Orlais it was to observe and read people. She could tell by the way a man walked what kind of work he did. She could tell by the way someone brushed their hair from their face if they were telling the truth or not. If they twisted this way or that she could tell if they were in pain or just tired. So many things could be learnt from studying people.

Her gaze fell upon the quiet warrior sitting by herself, leaning in against the thick trunk of an old oak tree. There was something dark and intriguing about the taciturn elf girl. Leliana had spoken to her on just a few occasions answering the girl's question about herself, but whenever she tried to learn more about the young woman she deflected her questions, always finding an excuse to leave. It was much curious that she did this, and even more so she found it odd that she had not yet been able to get the girl to talk. She had used every trick in her book, still the girl remained silent. The only one who seemed to have some sort of connection with her was the snarky witch Morrigan whom she seemed to speak quite freely with. Leliana suspected that it was a bond flourished from the fact that neither of them derived from the city nor held much love for the human race.

Leliana studied the elven girl's sharp features. Even from the distance she was standing on she could read the outlining of the thin tattoo pattern that ran across all of the right side of the elf's face. The ink was a deep-brown colour and thin, circular lines traced her right temple. The same circular forms trailed across her cheek, wounded up above her eye, bent and made a loop from one eyebrow to the other. Thin details spread across her forehead reminding Leliana of swirling smoke and flames. The pattern continued on the elf's pointy chin and from each corner of her mouth ran two lines following the outlining of her jaw all the way up to her ear lobe. The first time Leliana had seen it the barbarity of the thin lines running across the young woman's face had made her feel uneasy, but she found in time it was something she had grown used to. In fact these days she barely noticed it, thinking how strange and naked the elf must look without it. Keeland's hair which was normally tied up in a plait hung loose and swam across her shoulders.

Sitting like this she looked almost peaceful, a contrast to the fierce warrior she was during the days throwing herself into the battle with such carless passion Leliana sometimes feared for Keeland's life and sometimes even her own, but every time the young elf proved her skills when it came to tactics and they all came out of the battle with nothing more than a couple of bruises and scratches. Keeland usually came out worst though, seemingly having no concern of her own life. Leliana recognized the veil that seemed to sweep across the girl's eyes before entering a battle. She had seen it in many men and women in the poorer districts of Orlais – the Eaters. The Eaters always wore that glossy gaze, chewing on the sweet nymph root, always craving it and would do anything for a small piece of root. Leliana had witnessed many crimes committed upon the promise of the sweet root. It was not so much the craving she recognized, but the absent look of someone going into a state of mind where the outside world did not matter. It was like that with Keeland when she entered battle and the bloodlust siezed her. Her eyes glanced over and she charged at the enemy striking out with ruthless preciseness yet without much concern for her own life. She earned herself more than just a few gruesome scars. Then when the battle was over Keeland would hang her head and a stand like that – her back turned towards them, until she seemed to have come back to the world again, always taking large gulps from the water skin strapped to her hip. Then she would turn around and look at them making sure they were all alright.

"You know, if she found you staring at her like that she would not be happy." Alistair's voice broke through her thoughts. She chuckled a little before she turned towards him.

"In that you are probably right." She admitted then frowned a little. "Why is that?"

"What?"

"Why would she be mad?"

"Aside from the 'just because', it probably has something to do with her being… Well, an elf." He said quietly

"Ah…" Of course, having humans stare at you was not only awkward, but often very provoking. "Has she always been so…"

"Off-standish?" Alistair quirked his eyebrow.

Leliana smiled vaguely. "Well, yes."

Alistair squirmed a little. "It's hard to understand her, half of the time I'm not even sure she wants to be here. It's like she…"

"Despises us?" Leliana filled in.

Alistair nodded. "Understandable though, then other times she's a great leader who would give her life to protect us."

Leliana studied her some more before turning her gaze away. "I'm sure she'll come around soon enough. She is probably just tired, no?" She said in her heavy orlesian accent, smiling.

"Well, aren't you just a ball of sunshine and fluff?" Alistair muttered earning himself a slap on his shoulder as she giggled heartily.

"Ouch!" He gasped in mock hurt, rubbing his shoulder, and pouting slightly. "Well, was it not for the fact that I shall tempt destiny and point out to the swooping witch of the wilds that it's our turn to keep watch, I would love to linger." Alistair sighed dejectedly towards the ominous looking dark-haired woman stirring the regents in the pot by the campfire.

"Ah, well I shan't keep you." Leliana winked, secretly happy to be left alone with her thoughts.

This wasn't exactly how she had pictured it when she decided to follow her vision from the Maker. Surely, she had felt Keeland's resistance to let her on board, but even so, she had not imagined the coldness the warrior would treat her with most of the time. Then again it was silly to think that someone like a grey warden would have time to waste precious time conversing with someone like her. A delusional chantry girl - according to most of the companions, even Alistair found her a bit... Odd. She could see it, like she could see everything else.

Retreating to her tent she looked at the bronze amulet the warrior had given – or rather thrust into her hand, the other day at camp, mumbling something about dirt roads, corpse and better she keep it than it goes to waste. It had left her quite… curious. Keeland treated them much with disdain most of the time, yet tried to keep morale up by showing efforts in giving all of them gifts. And not just any gifts, they were - if not amiably given, at least well considered. A chantry amulet for her, a toy for Alistair – though he kept trying to convince her it was a relic, paintings for Sten, and Maker knows how she knew he liked them, he never seemed to talk. Sometimes when she watched the two of them sitting next to each other she secretly wondered which one of them would win a staring contest. She really could not tell.

There was a sound of boots pressing on the soft grass and she looked up to find Keeland standing in front of her, arms folded.

"Oh, hello." She said lightly, a twinkle in her blue eyes.

Keeland squinted. "You know, perhaps I would like shems more if they weren't so idle to gossip about one behind one's back."

"I… Err… It's not nice to eavesdrop!" Leliana found herself blushing profoundly.

"I'm an elf, I hear everything, but even if I wasn't it was impossible not to hear your yappering." Keeland snorted, glaring at her.

"I… Ahem…" The sight of Keeland standing cross-armed in front of her in a thin tunica and linen trousers barely hiding her toned body and firm breast made her swallow thickly. _Don't look at her!_ Her eyes darted to the fire.

Keeland swayed in an effort to catch the blushing bard's eyes. "Why do you look at me as if I'm to ravage you?" She snarled annoyed.

"Oh, is that a promise, you must do that then." Leliana chuckled before she could stop herself.

Something in Keeland's eyes flickered by before she frowned and turned around walking off to her tent muttering something about shemlen women.

Leliana lay awake staring up at the tent's falling ceiling unable to sleep her thoughts drifting from one thing to another finally settling on the apostate witch. From the minute they met she found that the golden eyed witch did not like her the least. She'd overheard her calling her a 'chantry wench' and much to her surprise Keeland hadn't filled in with that raw laughter, but scoffed and told the witch not to say things like that out loud.

Muffling noises and the rustling of heavy armor interrupted her thoughts. She rolled over and strained her ears. There it was again. She frowned and rolled onto her knees crawling out from her tent glancing over at Keeland's tent. Was she up already? She couldn't have slept for more than two candle lights. She expected the tent's flaps to separate when the warrior stepped outside, but they never did. Still the rustling kept on. At this rate the warrior would wake up half the camp not to mention attract half of the area's hurlocks. She pulled her furs close and walked up to the tent hissing through her teeth.

"You know putting on your heavy armor in the middle of the night might not have been one of your greater ideas."

There was no answer and no pause in the constant stirring and the warrior's muffles became increasingly stressed. Leliana opened the flaps and found the warrior tossing in her sleep, sweat breaking out on her forehead. She leaned in and laid a soft hand on the elf's shoulder knowing full well she might take it off should she think she was an intruder.

Keeland flew up with a scream drawing her knife, pressing it hard against the bard's silky throat.

"It's me, it's me Leliana!" The red-haired bard gasped, not daring to move. Instinctively Keeland turned her head away from the bard, tears burning her eyes. She let her hand drop to her side as she tried to focus on her breathing.

"Are you alright?" Leliana's accented voice broke through to her.

"Leave… My… Tent… NOW!" She spoke in an uncontrolled ragged voice.

"Keeland, what's wrong?" Leliana didn't recognize the warrior's strange voice. Keeland's body shook as she fought off the emotions rising within her like a dark demon. She couldn't speak in fear of slipping. She felt her skin crawl, and her eyes started to sting. Before she knew it she scrambled to her feet stumbling out from the tent and into the dark forest leaving the shaken bard sitting with her bedroll in her hands.


	2. Fragments of Time

**DISCLAIMER:** BioWare owns everything Dragon Age-ish, all the characters, names and such except for Keeland who is my own creation born several years before Dragon Age: Origins came about. And me, I'm merely a fan with no life with too much time on my hands and a deep, dark desire to see my FemPC and Leliana hook up! ;)

**A/N:** Second chapter is up and I'm really happy to see that quite a few have added this story to their favorites. It is an absolute honour! And thanks to everyone who's been reviewing the story, it is ever so appreciated. :)

Also, so far the piece is rated T – might become M later on. And the story diverges slightly from the game (I think). This is ultimately FemPC/Leliana fic – so yeah, femslash! And it's not really Alistair friendly… Though not really unfriendly, it simply has a different point of view of him than most fics do.

Enjoy!

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THE WATER'S EDGE RIPPLED SLIGHTLY in the cool night breeze and the low buzzing from the mating crickets echoed across the placid waters. Keeland sat by the shore and started across the surface, her arms wrapped around her legs, chin resting on her knees. The dreams haunted her. They were always the same. They're standing in front of the mirror one minute, the next she feels herself flying across the empty crypt landing with a dull thud on the cold stone floor. She can hear Tamlen scream, a terrified, painful scream, staggering backwards covering his face with his hands and when he turns to look at her his eyes is nothing but hollow eye sockets. He curses her for leaving him to rot in the darkspawn-filled caves, promises to never forgive her. Whispers of the pain he endures. She groaned loudly, trying not to think about the dreams where Tamlen is still alive, wrapping his arms around her, but when she leans in to kiss him he's nothing but a soulless vessel to harbour the taint. She usually woke up from her own thrashing, cold tears trickling down her cheeks. Tonight though the bard must have heard her and tried to soothe her. She flinched a little at the thought of the surprised bard, realizing she'd have to come up with a pretty decent explanation for her behaviour. Or she could just put on her stone face, barricading herself with walls as thick as mountains and act as if nothing had ever happened. Would that work?

She knew it probably wouldn't, the bard would not satisfy with her stalking off this time. She'd seen it in her eyes earlier that night. She wanted to know more. Keeland scoffed scornfully. A shem. Knowing more, wasn't that a ridiculous thought? They knew nothing! Sitting on their high pedestals trying to enforce control and order over things which cannot be controlled. It only took one a short glance to see their corrupted, power seeking minds, scheming to overthrow each other, intriguing and manipulating. Thinking they owned the whole world they defiled the earth, and all its creatures, condemning anything and anyone who did not fit in on their description of blessed or high ranked.

She had never been to the different alienages, but had heard stories, and she knew full well what happened to young elf girls in those districts. She frowned. Rape, torture, slavery and abuse, that's what elves endured since the beginning of time, and those exposing them were no fade spirits, no abominations, no demons. They were the vilest creature of all – men. Only men could treat their sister or brother with such cruelty. She looked at Alistair and she saw the same arrogance, the same egoistic, selfish need to wallow in their weak emotions. Even Wynne displayed this with her constant lectures of how things should be done. Sten wasn't a human, she ignored him most of the time as did he her. And the bard, it was not purely altruism that made her want to know more. Even the religious bard had her reasons for being her, as did they all, but in comparison to the humans, at least she was honest about why. She growled in frustration. Being forced to travel with all these humans brought out the worst in her. She detested them for even thinking that their hospitality and care would right anything wrong between man and elves. The only one who seemed to understand this was the witch. And she was thankful the witch was there, keeping her from going insane.

In the past few days battling the hordes monsters, meeting with kings and teyrns, having them address her as someone and not something, partly angered her, partly confused her. It was all so surreal and dreamlike to her. She shook her head and dug her fingers into the wet cold sand relaxing at the contact. This – the feel of the wet sand against her hands was the only thing that felt real, that gave her a sense of being alive.

"You know, I never figured you to be much of a talker, but this is little talk even by your standards."

She spun around at the sound of the familiar voice, staring straight into Tamlen's grey eyes. She squeezed her eyes shut, but when he didn't disappear she sighed feeling something pull at her heart.

"You are not pleased to see me Lethallin?" He looked concerned.

She shook her head 'no' tears fleeing her eyes as she watched Tamlen's ghost-like figure.

He looked taken aback by this.

"Seeing you means I'm crazy." She mumbled quietly, wiping the tears away.

Tamlen chuckled amusedly. "Well, we always knew _that_, didn't we?" He winked mischievously.

She smiled a little at his remark remembering her life with the clan. The life she had before all of this started. Duncan the elderly warden who had lost his life at Ostagar had summed up her life quite meekly to the other wardens. _"Hunting in the forest", indeed! _She snorted. As if hunting had been the only thing she and Tamlen did. Sharing a tent before going through the mating ceremony was unthinkable in the clan, but Keeland and Tamlen always found other places to savour the feel of each other's skin. Then there were the occasional times were Keeland had found herself enjoying the company of another female during the Gathering of Clans. Tamlen had merely shrugged at this knowing her heart belonged to no one but him. Elves were not as virtuous and rigid as most people seemed to believe. She closed her eyes for a short second wishing she was there, aching for him to be with her again.

"Not all bad memories." Tamlen smiled.

She frowned. "Why are you still here? Why can't you leave me to get over you?" She asked quietly, her voice trembling.

"Ah Lethallin, if only it was me who chose to stay."

She looked up at him.

"It is not I who choose to stay, it is _you_ who keep me here." And with that he dissolved into thin air leaving her alone once again.


	3. Confrontation

**DISCLAIMER:** As we all know BioWare owns everything Dragon Age-ish, all the characters, names and such except for Keeland who is my own creation born several years before Dragon Age: Origins came about.

**A/N:** I was going to update last night, but the Awakenings expansion came out here where I live and I got a tad distracted… by anger and disappointment. :( it's really not what I expected so I figured I'd cure my sorrows with some fan fiction writing. ;)

T rated so far, but be WARNED: there might be a passage describing some casual intimate interactions in the next chapter – we'll see…. I wouldn't go so far as M rate it as it's not very descriptive, but nonetheless a small warning has been issued. This story diverges slightly from the game (I think). Also I've made Alistair less of a prude… This is ultimately FemPC/Leliana fic – so yeah, femslash for the people! - In good time! Have patience ;)

Enjoy! And review if you feel like it – it's always appreciated.

_**Special thanks to Xmaster**_ for beta-reading this one for me!

* * *

KEELAND GRABBED THE WARDEN BY the collar of his chestplate.

"Listen you self-pitying, pathetic son of a shem! I'm sick of you wallowing in your self-righteous… rightness!" The elf hissed through clenched teeth.

The group had just made camp for the night after a long day at Redcliffe where things hadn't really gone as they planned. Or rather as Alistair would have liked it. They had defended the village, even though both Keeland and Morrigan thought it was a waste of their time, nonetheless Keeland had agreed to it in order to get Arle Eamon's support against the blight. Leliana sighed when she thought of what had happened after the town had been defended and Lady Isolde came running from the castle.

Keeland had been certain that it was just another detail that needed to be sorted, but it had turned out to be much more complicated than that.

The Arle's son had made a pact with a demon and thus been possessed by it. There really wasn't much of a choice. Both Bann Teagan and Alistair had expressed their unwillingness to slay a child, but that it was in fact an abomination. She could not stand idly by and endorse the slaying of an innocent child. She had seen the indecisiveness in Keeland's eyes, a weary look, asking for guidance, but all the opinion's differed, and they had all turned to her for a decision. The apostate Jowan had voiced the alternative of using blood magic and Lady Isolde had volunteered, thus agreeing to her own death.

Leliana understood it must have seemed to be the best choice in the situation, sending Morrigan into the Fade with the help of blood magic, but it also meant killing another human being. Morrgian had – as expected, objected asking if she had no say in this, but still agreed to do it.

Leliana cast a glance over at the witch who sat by the fire looking unusually tired and weary, dark circles underneath her eyes, her otherwise so stern eyes empty and hollow.

Morrigan may be a rather unnerving, harpy-tongued witch, but she was still… part of the group. Leliana picked up her bowl of stew and walked over to the witch nudging her with it and much to her surprise Morrigan looked up at her and took it. No snarky comments, no nasty nicknames.

She slid down and sat next to the witch who was probably too tried to object against it though Leliana had no doubt it would have earned her a nasty spell put on her had it been under normal circumstances, but it was not and now the two wardens were in the middle of a heated argument about Lady Isolde.

"You could have tried harder! We could have gone to the Circle of Magi!" Alistair had screamed when they entered the camp, upset and shaken.

"We just came from there! We travelled three days from there to Redcliffe, you would have wanted us to travel another three days back and then tree days again, wasting precious time that we do not have?" Keeland argued.

"There is nothing you can say to convince me. You're selfish and you don't want to be here, you only do this for your own selfish reasons!"

This seemed to have triggered the elf whose eyes burned with such anger Alistair had taken a step backwards before her hands grabbed his collar.

Keeland tried to shake the taller warden her words echoing through the whole camp. Leliana stood up from where she sat. She could recognize a crisis moment when she saw one and she had to settle this argument or something was going to break.

"Keeland." Leliana said in a calm voice, trying to soothe the elf's temper.

"Oh, shut up you stupid wench or I shall defile more than just your Maker!" Something dangerous burned behind the warrior's eyes and Leliana retreated wincing at the harsh words.

"You're so caught up in feeling sorry for yourself you can't even lead a group. You're my senior! You're supposed to do this _not _me, I'm doing your task! Yet you complain and second guess my every decision rooting for your own solutions. Yet you follow me around like a love sick puppy!

"Why don't _you _lead? If you know better. It's not like I chose to meddle with this. This isn't even my problem." She snarled.

"It's the blight. It's _everyone's _problem." Alistair's temper flaring.

"Wrong! Who was it that said that men snuck into the black city and the maker's bloody high seat and became darkspawn's because of their greed? Cause if I remember correctly it sure as hell wasn't the elves or the dwarfs. If humans weren't so greedy for power and control over this world you wouldn't have doomed us all to this!"

Alistair stood quiet not really knowing how to respond.

"I spit on you and your false truth." She fumed at him before shoving him in the chest with such force he stumbled backwards barely keeping his balance. Then she spun on her heels ant stormed off into the dark forest.

The camp lay quiet, even Leliana sat silent by the fire poking it absentmindedly with a stick. The fire crackled and spat every once in a while and except from Pork Chops' snores it was the only sound coming from the small camp.

Leliana eyed the large mabari hound that lay sleeping outside Keeland's tent faithfully awaiting her return. She shook her head at the lazy big hound and wondered why on earth Keeland had named it with such… ironic name.

Glancing over at Alistair she could see that their leader's brute words clearly had hurt him and she moved over to him slowly.

"Are you… alright?" She placed her nimble hand on his tensed shoulder.

He sighed loudly and shook his head. "How can someone be so…"

"Frightened?" Leliana filled in soothingly.

"I was going more for unlikeable or despicable even." He grumbled with a pout on his lips.

"Well, how would you feel? Stuck with a duty, quite a heavy burden on your shoulder with no real guidance of what to do and when you try all you get is resistance from… well, 'shems'. She's not a bad person."

He looked at her and frowned. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?" She asked surprised at his question not really sure what he meant.

"Like her?"

She chuckled and gave his cheek a soft stroke. "The same way you do it I suppose." There was no denying that Keeland was exquisite and the darkness and silence added to her alluring appearance, and she had seen how Alistair had looked at her from time to time.

"Well I _don't _anymore… for at least… a few days." He argued.

"You shouldn't be so hard on her. You know it's hard for all of us, but for her it must be even harder, always putting everyone else ahead of her.

"Have you not noticed she doesn't sleep at night? And if she does it isn't for long."

Alistair sighed. "I… Haven't thought about it."

"I've heard her leave her tent going for strolls in the middle of the night. It must be lonely not having anyone to talk to."

"She does that doesn't she? Goes off into the forest." Alistair agreed.

"She most certainly seems to like the forest." Leliana said peering in to the dark woods.

"Hello, she's _Dalish_. That's what they do, l_ive _in the forest."

"Why Pork Chop?" She asked him still looking at the edge of the forest in case she would see the taciturn elf.

"Because it's edible and kind of tasty? Plus we didn't have anything else left from Redcliffe…"

Leliana chuckled. "No, why did she name him Pork Chop?"

"Oh that… She couldn't think of anything else at the time, I think she was hungry, you know how she likes to eat. She said she would change it, but I guess it just stuck."

"That is quite morbid."

"But it is funny, isn't it?" Alistair's mood seemed to have lightened up a little. "Don't worry she'll be back." He said looking at Leliana frowning at the forest.

"I know." She said silently wondering where she could have gone off to.


	4. Release Me

**Disclaimer: **I've said it a million times, so you know BioWare is the boss.

**A/N: **Ok, this is a 'M'-rated chapter, be aware! Tread carefully. ;)

In all honesty, it's really not that bad, but aanyway, just to keep everyone happy.

Enjoy!

Ps. Has anyone had problems with the stories being published, but not listed?

Seems like I have…

* * *

**Release**

THE SILENT FOREST WAS SOOTHING at this time of night, the brisk summer air brushing gently against her face. Sitting on the thick branch of a Ferelden rain tree listening to the soft whispers of the earth seemed to soothe Keeland, her rage seemingly evaporating off of her into the air leaving her with a profound sense of emptiness.

Something seemed to move next to her and she half expected to see Tamlen crouching on the branch next to her just as he used to, but he had been replaced by air.

She had found herself slipping inch by inch ever since Leliana found her in her tent and the lack of sleep made her even more vulnerable. Then the whole Redcliffe thing had happened and she felt like the worst person in the world. Alistair was right. She could have tried harder, instead she took a son's mother away. But why couldn't he have stepped in? It was _he _who suggested slaying Connor. If he knew about the Circle of Magi why couldn't he have said so instead of just standing there like a buffoon?

She closed her eyes. They had all stared at her, each set of eyes begging her for different thing. Alistair for a painful and quick release for the possessed boy, Isolde for her not to hurt her boy, Bann Teagan for a quick solution not to waste more time, and then her eyes found Leliana's. The blue eyes seemed to penetrate her, begging her not to kill the boy.

When she couldn't find a way to make them all happy she took the easiest way out.

And with Morrigan's remark about it being a sensible choice and Isolde's consent it seemed to weigh four against two.

Afterwards they had all stared at her as if she was some kind of monster. Perhaps she was. Perhaps this whole thing had turned her into something terrible, this taint growing within her, feeding off of her.

It was at times like these she missed her best friend the most.

She leaned back against the thick trunk. Staring up at the leaves, pictures from her former life faded in and out of the green foliage.

Tamlen's mischievous eyes stared back at her and her body filled with such loneliness that she curled up in a sitting ball, head resting in her own lap, clutching her chest. Shameful tears streaking down her cheeks, burning them deceitfully. A helpless yelp escaped her lips when she surrendered herself to the grief and pain she had been bottling up for so long.

The memory of him tore at her chest. He was her best friend, her lover. He knew her like the back of his hands. He knew that when she said 'one portion' she actually meant two. He knew two blinks meant she was angry. Arms folded, she was insecure. Biting her bottom lip, she was sad. He knew that when she was mad or angry she needed him close for comfort, and when she was grumpy she needed a mug of hot, soothing redwood leaves.

Tamlen would imitate shems with such humour and preciseness she would double over with laughter until she cried. She missed his laughter, the way he chuckled from deep within his throat. She missed his stupid jokes, and his terrible sense of humour and she missed his hands, the feel of his skin.

"Why so sad Lethallin?"

"Shut up. You're not real."

"I am most certainly not. Were I real had I never been wearing such ridiculous thing."

She looked up at him sitting crossed legged in front of her. He was wearing a ridiculous orlesian nobleman's outfit with a hat embellished with lots of fruit on it.

A smile tugged at the corner of her mouth.

"Smile for me Keeland." His voice turned serious.

She shook her head.

"I loved your smile."

"You're _not _Tamlen."

"I have his memories. I have his feelings."

It would have been easy to give in, but she refused.

"You're on a great adventure. That's what I always wanted."

"So you had to go and touch a stupid mirror?" His words stung at her.

Tamlen had always said how she was never meant for a life with the clan, how she was meant for greater things. His deep chuckle reached her ears and she hid her face in her hands again.

"Keeland, look around you. There's a camp full of people who wants to get to know you. Why are you sitting in a tree talking to a ghost?"

"Full of _shems_." She corrected him.

"Nonetheless, they are waiting for you to let them in. Especially that strange shemlen."

"Which one? They're _all _strange."

"They are not so different from you or me."

"You really are not Tamlen…"

"Lethallin." His voice was soft again. "You're right. I'm not Tamlen, I'm merely his shadow, but you must let me go."

"I can't." She whispered. "I love you."

"And I you, but you and I both know that the pantheons have other plans for us." His eyes were serious.

She shook her head again her tears falling. "If I can have you with me this way, then so be it." She said stubbornly.

"You know that would not be right or fair. You wish for me to wander this world like this?" There was pain in his voice. The same sort of pain she could hear in her dreams.

"No…"

"Then let me go."

She looked up into his eyes again. "If you promise me one thing, I will."

He looked at her curiously before agreeing.

"Touch me once more and I will."

It was a strange request, she knew it, but she needed it if she were to lose him forever again. If only she had known before they went in to that stupid cave. If only she hadn't yelled at him while hunting, then maybe he hadn't gone off, running straight into those stupid shems! And then neither of them would be in this situation.

She wished that the last memory of them together before venturing into that cave wasn't them fighting about a stupid misunderstanding. And now he was sitting in front of her, a ghostly shadow of himself pleading with her to let him go. And she would, if only she could feel the touch of his hands against her once more.

He cocked his head looking at her curiously. "You have my word Lethallin." He said then he faded and she found herself alone on the thick branch, staring at nothing but thin air.

---

---

When she returned to camp most of her companions had retreated to their tents aside from the bard and the warden. They turned at the sound of her footsteps exchanging an anxious glance between them before getting up.

Alistair squirmed awkwardly and Leliana twisted her hands nervously. She smiled inwardly at their reactions, relaxing her posture a little. Was she really _that _intimidating?

Alistair eyed her cautiously opening his mouth to say something, but she held up her hand and he closed his mouth again.

"I'm sorry." She said slowly. She said it partly because she was, partly because Tamlen's stupid words had stuck to her, and she had figured on her way back' that things would probably be easier and perhaps run smoother if she _tried _to tolerate them at least. She didn't have to love them, just like them enough to put up with them.

"I'm sorry as well. I have been too hard on you, I know you try your best and I haven't really been making your job easier." He spoke softly looking at her with a sincere look.

"Well, I still shouldn't have said what I said. It was… _almost_ uncalled for." She grinned at the last few words and found Alistair's friendly eyes squint with a warm smile.

She turned to Leliana and bit her bottom lip. "I'm sorry I lashed out at you… I'm not very good with… err… emotions?" She mumbled. For some reason apologizing to the bard was harder. She'd seen the hurt and frightened look upon her face and much to her dismay it had… saddened her. She looked into the bard's blue orbs searching for a sign of what she was thinking. Usually the bard chirped and hummed silly serenades, but now she merely shrugged her shoulders and nodded.

"I… think I will go to sleep now that you are back. Oh and I made you this, I thought it might help... soothe you." She said shortly, pushing a mug into Keeland's hands before vanishing into her tent.

"I probably deserved that, huh?" Keeland said sniffing the mug. Redwood leaves! She gazed after he bard wondering how she knew of such draft.

"Yeah, I think you did." Alistair said glancing over at the bard's tent. "But now that she's asleep we can steal some of her cheese." He said and ogled the cheese next to Leliana's tent.

"You really like you're cheese." Keeland frowned.

"So, you have noticed. Are you spying on me my fair lady?" He said jokingly quirking an eyebrow.

"You wish shemlen." She said.

He turned away, still smiling a little, seemingly plotting how to steal Leliana's cheese. She noticed how he bore some similarities to Tamlen. For a slight second she thought she saw his tattoo flash on Alistair's face and she was overwhelmed by the urge to turn his face towards hers and gently caress it.

He turned his face towards her and looked concerned. "Are you alright, you look a little pale." He said tilting his head in the same manner as Tamlen.

"I'm fine, just tired." She said massaging her temples gently before she looked up at him again. She felt herself sway a little when his eyes no longer held his own colour but bore Tamlen's grey tint.

"Woha… Maybe you should rest." He said and grabbed her gently by her arm to hold her steady.

His touch made her want him to come closer. Or was it him? Would it have mattered who sat there in front of her with its hand on her arm. Just the simple touch sent sparks flying on her skin, making her feel closer to him or Tamlen rather. She searched his gentle eyes for some sign and when his face faded over, morphed into Tamlen's she pulled him closer embracing him fiercely, running her hands through his hair.

Alistair let out a surprised sound at the sudden close contact with the elf that most of the time seemed to hate him. Keeland didn't care, pushing him away from her to study his face. Tamlen's tattoos, his eyes, his lips, his bewildered smile, his cheekbones, his thin nose.

"It's you." She mumbled before pulling him close locking lips with him. At first carefully, gently, searching, aching. Then passionately urging him to come closer.

Pulling free from her Alistair breathed heavily. "What are you doing?"

"Shh…" She hushed him, pulling his arms around her, and then pulling his head towards hers. He hesitated slightly before giving in, kissing her feverishly, running his hands over her armour-clad body. Pulling him with her as she laid down he started unbuckling her armour, her hands tugging at his.

Not wanting to forget she kept her eyes open imprinting Tamlen's face on her cornea, savouring the feel of his skin on hers, holding him close, feeling his every tremble as he moved along with her. When he stopped moving she breathed heavily. Looking into Alistair's eyes, she cried turning away from him, watching Tamlen dissolve in front of her for the last time.

* * *

**A/N: **Well like I stated earlier, Alistair ain't a prude in this fic. :)


	5. Feelings Untrusted

**Feelings Untrusted**

NEARLY TWO WEEKS HAD PASSED SINCE the wardens' quarrel and even though Keeland had apologized the tension seemed to be even more evident than before. They barley spoke to each other and Keeland seemed to be avoiding Alistair on purpose.

Leliana had avoided Keeland for her own reasons – partly because she didn't know how to talk to her, partly because… she'd heard her with Alistair. She scowled at herself. She was being unreasonable, she knew that, it's just that… Alistair? Didn't she call him a self-pitying whatdoyoucallit, and then she… frolics around with him!

And it wasn't as if anyone else hadn't heard it. It was basically all the others had gossiped about days afterwards, observing the wardens behaviour towards each other. Even Morrigan had joined in whole-heartedly.

Leliana didn't want to hear about it, but put up a brave face until Zevran had to go and give her mental images. She'd snapped at him causing him to stare at her luridly.

"Oh, Leliana, you're jealous." He had stated with that mischievous look upon his face.

"I am _not_!I just don't want to know everything!" She argued heatedly.

"Well, you know, good old Zevran is always available and ready to help should you feel… the need to get rid of this jealousy of yours." He had winked before strolling off in a casual manner.

Zevran was the blonde assassin from Antiva they had picked up two days after their… fight, when he had tried – and miserably failed, to kill the warden's, and ever since the camp had been filled with naked Zevran, flashing Zevran, flexing Zevran, stretching Zevran… she was beginning to have nightmares.

She wasn't jealous. It wasn't that, she was just… _don't say it! _She scolded herself.

---

---

She looked over at Keeland who was walking ahead of the group, her helmet dangling from her belt. Leliana couldn't blame her, the sun was broiling hot and the light leather armour was making her uncomfortable and warm so she could only imagine how the warrior felt in her heavy armour.

Despite the tension between Keeland and Alistair Leliana thought that the elf appeared a little… Less dark, and she slept better. Not that Leliana was keeping track… Keeland had started talking more and the other day she even tried to make a joke with Sten who simply stared back at her. The elf had stuck her tongue out and spun on her heels and when Sten thought no one noticed Leliana saw a smile creep on to his face.

Looking to her side she saw him trod along like a burly old mare on the dirt road. She grinned and walked up to him.

"I've got you all figured out." She said as she walked up next to him.

"You have not." He answered in his monotonous voice.

"Oh yes I have. I saw you the other day at camp when you thought no one was watching." She said with a sly look.

Sten raised his eyebrow. "Really now?"

"I saw you _smile_." She said looking like she was up to no good with a grin on her face.

"You did not." His face turned to stone again.

"Oh yes I _did _and not only did I see that… I saw you picking them flowers." And the ace was out! _One – nil to Leliana! _She patted herself mentally.

"Those were for my potions."

"No they weren't. You're just one big softie." She almost squealed.

Sten's face snapped towards her. "We shall never speak of this again." He said menacingly.

"Sure, hand me a cookie and we've got ourselves a deal." Sten squinted at her almost refusing before she added "softie" in her most innocent voice.

He grunted displeased and dug around in his backpack. "Mention this to no one bard, I could have you killed."

Leliana smiled contently chewing on her cookie. "You have my word…"

"Don't say it!" The big quanari warned stalking off.

Leliana giggled a little, all too pleased with herself.

"Care to share what's so funny?"

Leliana nearly choked on her cookie. Turning to face Keeland her mouth full of crumbly, sweet cookie she blushed. Too embarrassed to chew she stood still like that staring at the warrior as she advanced on her. Keeland lifted her leather-clad hand and stroke Leliana across her plum lower lip looking mesmerized.

"Crumbs." She whispered.

Leliana didn't dare move, but nodded meekly.

"Why so quiet? Elf caught your lounge?" Keeland winked at her.

Thanking the Maker Leliana found that the cookie had melted in her mouth and she swallowed before opening her mouth. "I.." Oh, why couldn't she speak properly around Keeland!

"I just wanted to thank you for the mug of redwood leaves you made me the other week."

"Oh, I didn't know if you'd like it, but I thought well… sometimes when I'm upset I like to smell the scent of Andraste's Grace as it reminds me of my mother and it soothes me. I thought something familiar might calm you down. I know it's silly. I didn't think, I mean I probably shouldn't think that all elves like, well… like… like…" _Maker I'm rambling again!_

Keeland grinned. "I loved it. And you're cute when you ramble."

Leliana felt as if her cheeks were on fire and she tried to look as casual as possible. "I… Ah…"

Keeland laughed. "You are a strange shem, you know that don't you?" The minute she had said the words something flickered behind her eyes and the walls were up again. She seemed almost shaken as if she'd seen a ghost. "Anyway, I should scout ahead." She excused herself and took off before Leliana could say anything.

"I could get you a cookie…" She said lamely, watching the warrior move towards the front of the group again.

---

---

Keeland was lost in thoughts where she walked. _Especially that strange shemlen._ Tamlen's words rang in her ears. Over the past weeks the nightmares had lessened and his ghost hadn't haunted her anymore and her grief was subsiding. She glanced over at Alistair feeling slightly guilty. She had used him to be close to Tamlen, she used him to be with Tamlen one last time and it had hurt him. And maybe before she wouldn't have cared, but she felt herself torn. One part of her felt like she didn't regret being with Tamlen before letting him go, the other part felt as guilty as she could feel. Was it really Tamlen? Had she just wanted him to be there so badly she thought Alistair was him and she had used him for her own selfish need?

She had pulled away from him because as much as she regretted it she didn't have any feelings for him, other than those you have for a… companion, and she didn't want him to get the wrong idea. She didn't want him to think that this meant that they were anymore than what they were. But she could see it on his face; he thought he'd done something wrong, perhaps he even thought she felt he had used her. She groaned. She would have to talk to him.

Her gaze fell over upon the red-haired bard. She smiled a little in spite of herself. The bard had made her redwood leaves… and it was a genuinely nice thought. She was a little strange though, with her claims of the Maker speaking to her. Keeland wondered if it might have been her Tamlen referred to. What if it was? What should she do? She was _beautiful_, and Keeland had no doubt she was quite the little minx before joining the chantry. There were times when she'd been curious of the woman, but had never indulged on those feelings. Perhaps because she had been so busy mourning Tamlen, and now when she wasn't thinking of him constantly the bard seemed to pop into her thoughts every so often.

She studied the bard from where she walked. Most of the time she wore this smile on her face, wandering around as if she saw the world for the very first time. She hummed and sang, picking flowers and teasing Sten. Keeland had pretended not to hear anything, but in truth, she had heard everything. Keeland found it refreshing to see such naivety displayed when most of the time they slew darkspawns and fought an earth threatening blight. Perhaps it was this that granted the bard her ability to savour the moments? There was something about the bard though that she was curious about, the whole bard thing. No doubt Leliana could sing and tell stories, but something about her made Keeland think there was something more to the story than what she let on. She squinted her eyes a little making a mental note to ask her about it.

---

---

Keeland took a deep breath and walked up to the blonde warden. "Erm…" she cleared her throat to announce her presence.

Alistair turned around his eyes darting a little insecure when he saw it was her. "Oh, hi." He said awkwardly.

"I think, maybe we need to talk." She said trying her best not to take the easy way out and just keep on ignoring the big pink ogre in the middle of the room.

"Really? What about?" He said an octave higher than usual.

It was her turn to feel awkward and insecure. "I… About that night."

His stared at the ground. "Oh."

She sighed. "I'm sorry I pulled away from you afterwards… I just… I don't know who to explain this without sounding... mean and probably a little crazy."

"You could try, I'm a pretty good listener I've been told." He said jokingly trying to lighten the mood up.

It took her nearly an hour to explain to him about Tamlen and what had happened that night. She thought maybe he would laugh at her, or call her a crazy wench, maybe curse her, or ridicule her, but he just looked sad.

"I'm not sure it makes me feel better or worse." He said looking sad. "I… Need to think about this." He said before walking over to Wynne who gave her a disapproving look and she guessed the older preachy lady had figured out what happened.

_That's what you get for being a selfish slut! _She scolded herself.

---

---

They had travelled from Redcliffe and was closing in on Denerim, but much to Keeland's happiness the group all agreed it was better to make camp for the night rather than keep pressing on. She eyed the group as they went about their business, patting Pork Chop with her foot where he lay curled up at her feet.

"A berry for your thought." Leliana smiled at her dangling the red berries in front of her eyes as she approached.

"Why are you harassing me?" Keeland teased.

Leliana simply shook the little bundle of berries.

"I could just take those from you." Keeland snorted.

"Oh, you could certainly try." Leliana said flirtatious.

"Is that a…" _Was the bard..? Nooo…_

"Challenge? Why yes it is." Leliana interrupted.

Keeland frowned. "Why do you _always _interrupt people?"

"I don't!" Leliana defended herself. "I simply…"

"Yes you do and you butt into other people's business." The elf stated matter-of-factly.

"Oh, well so now you know all about me?" Leliana said indignantly, her pride a little hurt. It wasn't butting in it was just her way of helping. _Butting in! _Keeland's voice rang in the back of her head.

"Oh shut up." She muttered before the warrior leaned in so close she could feel her hot breath tickle her ever so sensitive throat.

"Actually, I don't know _everything _about you just yet." She purred with a predatory smile on her face.

Leliana felt her cheeks flush as the warrior gave her one last undressing look before Alistair's voice cut through the night.

"I'm sorry if I'm interrupting you two ladies, but I need to talk to Keeland." Alistair said nodding towards the lithe built elf.

Leliana nodded and slipped away leaving the two wardens by themselves, silently cursing Alistair for his untimely arrival.

Keeland looked at the warden, surveying his face finding she didn't like what she saw.

"I've been thinking about what you said." He started.

"Is it a good or bad thing?" Keeland wondered.

"I understand why you did what you did… but I wish you would've chosen someone else. I… I can't do this." He said solemnly.

"Can't do what?"

"This. I can't travel with you… I'm leaving for Denerim tonight." He said determinedly.

Keeland felt her stomach sink. This was not good! "You can't leave. You're a _Grey Warden_. This is bigger than you and me."

"Maybe, but I can't be near you right now."

"Look, I know we didn't think that night through, but what happened _happened_. You can't just cast aside your responsibility because you slept with the wrong girl!" She felt her temper flaring again. Why that selfish idiot!

"Obviously it was _you _who slept with the wrong guy." He spat at her.

Before either of them had time to react she slapped him across the face. "Fine. Then sod off! You just proved what everyone thinks about you right." His cheek burned red and she wished she hadn't been such a woman and just fisted him right in the face.

He glared at her one last time before grabbing his backpack stalking off into the night.

* * *

**A/N: **Firstly, I want to give thanks and kudos to everyone who has reviewed or read my story.

It feels awsome and I'm happy so many of you like it so far.

Ok, so like I've said earlier this is ultimately a FemPC/Leliana FemSlash fic.

However as we all know - both from real life and the game, we all come with a lot of

history. I know some think there's been a whole lot of references to "straight sex", though

picky as I am - working with HTBQ related issues, I wouldn't call the sex described as straight sex

as I personally define Straight Sex as an act between to individuals who _define and consider themselves_

_to be straight_. And I can tell you this much... Keeland is far from straight. ;) but thanks for bringin it up!

it most certainly needed to be said beacuse a few people have mailed me asking about it. :)

But fear not readers, the slash will come in good time.

Patience is a virtue. ;)

Enjoy and thanks for all the feedback!


	6. Clouded Judgement

**Clouded Judgement **

"BY ANDRASTE'S SAGGY..." Keeland started before she was interrupted by the bard who gasped in horror.

"Don't you dare!" She called out from behind her back. "Insulting the Maker and the holy Andraste..." She said with a playful wink.

Keeland found it strange how all her rage seemed to dissolve when she heard the bard's heavy orlesian tease her. She turned around and grinned slyly.

"Are you alright? Where's he going?" Leliana asked pretending not have heard anything.

Keeland sighed. "I'm fine... but he is such a stubborn moron!"

For a slight minute the bard wore a strange facial impression before shining up in a smile again. "I'm sure he'll be back. I mean, he'd be a fool not to... When he has…" Her voice trailed off.

Keeland scowled. "He would, but I don't think he realizes that, his too caught up with his own problems. I don't care if he comes back... I'll manage without him."

Leliana's gaze flicker insecurely. "I know the two of you are close, and..."

"And?" Keeland stared suspiciously at her.

"And well, that you are _close_." She said emphasizing the last word.

"Not any closer than you and me..." Keeland said slightly confused. Why did shemlens do this? They were always so cryptic and polite.

Shemlens always thought elves were timid and withdrawn because of their behaviour around humans, but that was simply a natural reaction to the disliked shemlens. In reality, amongst themselves the elves were quite the opposite, loud and hot tempered, and spoke their minds. These codes shemlens used, she did not understand them.

"We are not _that _close..." Leliana blushed a little when thinking about just how close the templar had managed to get to the elf.

"No?" Keeland raised an eyebrow. "How about if I give you this cookie, will that make you consider us being closer?" She said snickering slightly as the bard's eyes widened in surprise.

"How..."

"My dear bard, you are not the only one with bribes, tell me why you left Orlais and it is yours."

"Where did you get that?" She asked in surprise.

"Sten's stash, where else?" The warrior grinned.

"He just gave it to you? Oh I had to... blackmail him!" Leliana pouted.

"You blackmailed Sten? Are you _trying _to get yourself killed?" It was the elf's turn to be surprised.

Leliana batted her eyelashes firing off an innocent smile. "No, I just told him about something I saw."

"Well, I wasn't so gutsy so I just kind of... Took one."

"You _took _it?"

Keeland wore a bashful impression nodding slightly. Oh! Leliana was going to disapprove and not tell her anything. Blasted!

"Really, I didn't think you had the right aptitude for that kind of thing." The brad's reply surprised her slightly.

"Oh, there's a lot of things I've got the right aptitude for that you don't know of." Keeland winked and fired off a wicked smile at the bard whose gaze seemed to waver before she held out her hand.

"Fine, a cookie for my information." Keeland handed her the cookie. "Have I ever been this cheap?" The bard shook her head chuckling warmly.

---

---

Keeland opened her mouth to answer the bard when she caught the snapping twang of a bow. Pushing Leliana aside with such force that she fell over Keeland barely had time to twist her body before the thick arrow buried itself in her shoulder.

Her pained and angry scream jolted the group of companions alive. Pots and pans flew as they scrambled to their feet. Leliana rolled over grabbing her bow, loading it with arrows aiming at the band of hurlocks and genlocks storming out from the forest grunting in their growling voices.

Keeland winced in pain as she stormed towards the group grabbing her sword and shield as she passed them. Morrigan cast a spell hitting the first genlock freezing it to the ground as Leliana fired her deadly arrows at it bringing it to an end.

Sten charged towards the group, his massive body moving slightly slower than Keeland's. The antivan assassin Zevran lunged into the group of darkspawns lashing out with his daggers Pork Chops biting and clawing at the enemies right next to him.

Leliana tossed her bow aside before leaping into the fight jabbing at the rogue genlock with her poisonous daggers, Wynne working her healing spells.

Keeland swung her sword at the darkspawn spellcaster, bashing and pummelling with her shield. Every movement sent excruciating waves of pain through her body and she gritted her teeth. Wynne was casting her healing spells at her, but they only seemed to tingle a little before the pain was back full force and the blood started gushing again. She glanced down at her shoulder. Her white tunic was drained with dark-red blood, the arrow still sticking out of her shoulder.

Felling the spellcaster she spun around to find herself face to face with a giant Hurlock. He swung his shield in a circular motion before it struck her left shoulder pushing the arrow through her shoulder. She screamed in agony. Eyes blazing with anger before the pain overtook her and she fell to the ground.

There were outraged roars all around her. They weren't going to make it! Without both her and Alistair in the fight their group was lacking in power. Morrigan was quick with her spells and did great damage, but on her own with just two rogues and a slow warrior she hadn't much of a chance if being attacked herself.

"Shemshit..." She mumbled dizzily when she heard a clinging sound of another shield and the familiar shout of the templar.

Someone slid in next to her shaking her gently.

"Wynne!" Someone yelled, but knowing Wynne was needed to keep the rest of the group alive Keeland shoved her hand down the leather pouch strapped to her waist.

By Andraste's hairy beard it hurt! Digging around she found the small elfroot and thrust it into her mouth chewing it best she could. It tasted incredibly bitter and she grimaced and muttered before the pain became so overwhelming that the world went black, granting her release from the pain.

---

---

She had the strangest dreams where she bounced on white, fluffy clouds feeling an insatiable feeling of happiness and freedom. She bounced along until she came upon the sweet-looking bard. She looked absolutely silly wearing a pink, glittery dress with puffy arms, her hair pinned up in one of those strange hairdos the bard once told her about. Such Orlais behaviour!

Keeland giggled to herself. Well, she was a shem after all… a _pretty _shem! With pretty blue crystal orbs for eyes and pretty ruby lips. Maybe she could just like Leliana? Even Zevran thought she was pretty and he was an elf too.

"Soo pretty…" She cooed.

The bard leaned into something whispering. "What is she doing?"

"I'm not entirely sure… but it seems she's been sneaking swigs from Wynne's wine…" The giant cheese from Leliana's bedroll said.

"HA!" She screamed delightfully and pointed.

"What?" She heard the cheese whine in very much the same ton as Alistair the arse.

She pursed her lips then shook her head eyeing the cheese. "I am _so _hungry…" She said eyeing the cheese hungrily.

"Why… why is she looking at me like that? Is there something wrong?" Alistair's voice asked suspiciously.

"Yes your face let me rearrange that for you." Morrigan said.

The warrior turned her head towards the witch who was dressed in the orange chantry robe looking all virtuous and chaste. Keeland burst out in a loud laughter squeezing her stomach. This was too much! She would have to wake up soon.

"Hungry!" She clapped her hands gleefully and bounced over to the cheese and grabbed it then sunk her teeth into it.

"Ouch! Hey, _hey_!"

Keeland frowned. The cheese did _not _taste like cheese. She stuck out her tongue and wiped it off with her arm. "Yuk!"

"Heey!" The cheese said in a hurtful tone.

The bard giggled her ruby lips smiling grandly. They looked so inviting!

Keeland snickered a little and walked bounced over to the bard, fluttering and flowing across the fluffy strange clouds. This was _her _dream. No one would ever know what happened in her dreams and with that her lips descended on the bard's.

There was a surprised muffled sound before the bard gave in and let her taste her ripe lips, tongues swirling together. She broke free and breathed heavily. "This is a _good _dream." She murmured before yawning. Perhaps she could just close her eyes for a minute and…

---

---

The group stared at each other, then at the delusional warrior, and Leliana looked as if someone had slapped her several times across the face, the blush spreading all the way down to her chest.

"Of all the..!" She gasped after a while.

"She's gone off her rocker, she has!" Alistair exclaimed.

Sten simply bent down pulling he elf's eyelids open examining her eyes while Wynne tried to get the giggly warrior to lie still.

"Oh she must have been a menace as a child!" She scoffed impatiently. When she finally managed to untie the pouch her face shone up and she chuckled a little before holding up a root.

"It seems our leader managed to pick the wrong root."

"Nymphroot!" Leliana exclaimed. Now _that _would explain Keeland's strange behaviour.

A small hand flew up towards the root, nimble fingers grabbing after it.

Wynne scowled disapprovingly and snatched it away, swatting the elf's hand. Pulling out a small vial from her bag she opened the elf's mouth. "This should help you… calm down..."

"Apparently it's a long way down for her." Alistair said chuckling a little to himself before the rest of the group joined in laughing.

* * *

**A/N: **No disclaimer because we all know who DA:O belongs to and who Keeland belongs to. ;)

Also, a HUGE thanks to everyone who's been adding this story to their favourites, subscriptions and reviewed. And to anyone who's added me as their favourite author, I'm amazed and feel really, very honoured! Thank you so much!

So, I wrote this chapter trying to challenge my skills in writing comedy. It's not easy, I don't particularly like it, but one has to be versatile. Aaanyway, I hope you enjoy it and keep on reading en reviewing.

Enjoy!


	7. Bygone Times

**Bygone Times **

HER HEAD THROBBED VIOLENTLY AND her surroundings were blurry and unfocused. She blinked a few times feeling a distinct, sharp pain in her left shoulder like a dull thumping.

"Oow…" She groaned and tried to get up, but two hands forced her to lie still. Raising her head slightly she stared into the bard's warm eyes.

"Oh hey…" She mumbled with a smile as she remembered last night's dream.

"Hello there, how are you holding up?" The bard asked placing a hand on Keeland's face.

Keeland closed her eyes savouring the feel. "I… my head…" She croaked her voice dry as sandpaper. "What are you…?"

"Here." The bard said handing her a skin of water. "Drink, you will… err… need it today I suspect."

Keeland drank greedily feeling as if she hadn't drunk anything for days and her stomach rumbled. "I'm so hungry…" She moaned sitting up a little too fast and a little too soon. Her head spun and she felt the nausea wash over her.

Leliana put her hands on her shoulders staring her in the eyes. "I told you to take it easy. It's quite an injury you've suffered." Blue eyes searched hers and she felt her stomach flip slightly.

"I'm sure, but we have to get going, we need to reach Denerim and I need to find Alistair." Keeland said determinedly.

"Well, there's no rush. Denerim will still be there tomorrow and Alistair heard the group of darkspawns as he left and figured they were heading towards our camp, so he… returned for you." The bard said looking a little uncomfortable.

"He did?" Keeland was surprised the templar had had enough strength to return even after what he had explained to her. He'd come back for them even though he was hurting and found it hard to be near her, he came back to aid them… perhaps he wasn't all that bad?

Leliana nodded. "Would you like to see him?"

"No, it can wait…" She said slowly then looking at the red-haired orlesian. "What are you doing in here?"

"Well, what does it look like? I'm making sure you're ok."

Keeland narrowed her eyes. "Did Wynne tell you to babysit me?"

The bard giggled her twinkling giggle. "No… well maybe, but I'm happy to do it. I'm happy to be with yo…" She swallowed. "I'm happy to help you."

"Oh don't be shy now, you like pestering me, tell it as it is." Keeland winked.

"You know me too well warden." She joked back.

"Well, what was it then?" Keeland asked, her head starting to clear.

Leliana frowned. "What was what?"

"Well, what was the real reason you left Orlais, you never told me."

---

---

Leliana shuddered a little. She had hoped perhaps the warden had forgotten about that, but apparently getting pierced by an arrow and getting high on nymph root did not seem to distract the warden from getting the answers. It was a little unnerving, but also quite flattering that she wouldn't forget about her… she smiled a little. Perhaps it was time to tell the warden the truth anyway and who better to trust than a taciturn elf who merely spoke to anyone?

"It's a long story…" She said slowly not wanting to exhaust the already tired and wounded warden.

"Well, thanks to a bunch of bad-breathed darkspawns it looks as if I'm not going anywhere today, so I have all the time in the world." The warrior smiled weakly looking a little pale.

Leliana sighed and placed herself next to Keeland staring up at the tent's inner ceiling as she told the elf about her former life as a bard and minstrel. How she sang and told stories, manipulated and schemed, worked for noblemen, kings and queens, and how she fell in love. She told her about Marjolaine's betrayal, of how she had had her cast into the dungeons leaving her there to rot.

She closed her eyes and felt her body tremble when she thought back of the dungeons, the endless screams, and cries from the prisoners, the beatings and the torture. How the soldiers had defiled her body, broken her until she thought there was nothing left to break.

She turned away from the warrior blinking away the unshed tears her eyes held. She thought the peace and solitude in the Chantry would make it go away. She thought her faith in the Maker would keep her from thinking of her past life, what had been done to her. The pain it had caused.

As she spoke the elf listened intently and whenever she paused collecting her strength to retell the story the warden seemed to feel her need for reassurance and she would ask her little questions helping her to continue her story.

When she had turned away from the warrior she expected the warrior to lie waiting for her to continue in the gloomy silence, but instead Keeland rolled on to her good side and snuck her arm round her body. "You know I can always have her killed." She whispered pulling her close. "Or I could just sentence her to a life of imprisonment with Alistair and Morrigan in a tiny cell."

Leliana laughed through her tears slapping the warrior's hand. "I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy."

"No? How about I make her spend a year up in a tower with Zevran…?"

Leliana giggled. "No!"

"You are a hard lady to satisfy." Keeland grumbled.

"Why do you have them tattoo's on your face?" The bard asked suddenly, feeling the urge to talk about something else. Keeland seemed to understand and followed suit.

"Well, what do you know of the Dalish?"

Truth be told she knew very little, but she didn't want to seem ignorant. "I know a little of this and a little of that…" She answered evasively.

Keeland snickered. "Well, the Dalish revere the pantheons, which is in fewer words, five gods and four goddesses whom we call the creators. When we come of age we chose our own god to revere, it is quite the ceremony and a sign of adulthood and thus we have a blood writing made of our chosen god."

"Which one is yours?" Leliana asked feeling warm and secure where she lay fiddling with the warriors soft fingers.

"Ironically enough mine is Mythal, the great protector."

"It suits you…" The bard murmured sleepily.

Leliana didn't move, she didn't want to break the invisible bond holding them together, and she didn't want Keeland to stop talking about herself so she laid still until the warrior had covered all the elven history she could, and then until her breathing slowed, then until Keeland fell asleep, then until the sun had set, and until…

---

---

There were a few things the bard had felt herself blush about the past couple of months. Firstly and lately the kiss, it had been passionate, sensual and enticing. Keeland's lips had been soft, yet demanding and for a moment she had lost herself completely in the elf's kiss. But the question remained, gnawing on the bard. Who had the elf intended to kiss? Her or… Alistair? There was no way of knowing who the warrior had thought she kissed unless she asked. But what if the answer was Alistair? Would the elf pull away from her and look at her differently? Would it ruin the kind of relationship they had now? She couldn't bare the thought of it. But hadn't Keeland made all of those flirty comments? Or was that just the way she was? She wasn't like that with Wynne… or Sten… _or _Zevran. _And_ she had slept next to her holding her closely the whole night before they had arrived in Denerim… that had to count for something, right?

Leliana sat by the table at the Gnawed Tavern waiting for her food while pondering the options. This was luxury, but a luxury Keeland thought they all deserved and the bard was nothing but happy to be out of the forest, even if it were for just the night, sitting in the comfortable sofa.

Alistair and Keeland had spoken a little more since he returned which – did not worry her, but made her uncertain of what the warrior wanted.

Morrigan was poking at the bowl of soup she'd been served asking if "'Tis what soup is in human societies? And what is the difference between water and this? Hm?". She clearly disapproved.

Wynne and Zevran was discussion something about wine, women and song, but she didn't have half a clue as to what it was all about. Sten was having his own _silent _conversation.

Keeland had been told of her misfortune with the root, and she had laughed quite a lot about it, though she hadn't mentioned anything about what she might have seen, and neither had anyone else done.

The pretty barmaid brought their drinks, but before Keeland could gulp down her ale Wynne gave her a foreboding look. "No, child, I think you've had just about enough for a few days."

"Oh great, so you all get to frolic and I get nothing because I ate the wrong root?"

"_Please_, you've had your fair share of frolicking, don't you think? First the dim witted templar and then snogging the bard like there's no tomorrow." Morrigan snorted.

Keeland stared incredulously at Alistair who was studying the ceiling intently then she stared over at the bard who seemed to be memorizing the tablecloth's pattern.

She understood the Alistair comment, but Leliana?

Morrigan squeezed her cup between her hands grinning gleefully. "Oh, this is too good!" She chimed. "You don't remember the chantry girl's pining lips?"

Leliana stood up abruptly. "I… have to sleep!" Then she ran off towards her room.

Keeland shot Morrigan a dirty look, who winked back at her a sly grin on her face.

"Hey wait!" She called out before scurrying after the bard.

---

---

She caught up with the bard in the thin corridor leading to their rooms.

"What did Morrigan mean with that?"

Leliana froze at the door. "I don't know…" She tried slithering.

Keeland looked at her with an amused look. "Do you like me?" There was something playful in the warrior's voice as she took a step closer to the bard.

She turned around facing Keeland who was studying her curiously. Keeping as cool as possible she raised her eyebrows at the warrior. _Oh, two can play that game._ She mused.

"Doesn't everyone like you?"

Keeland grinned. "So we're playing this game." She said moving closer to the bard her face merely an inch away.

The bard's breath seemed to slow and her damp lips parted slightly.

"We're not talking about everyone else." Keeland said, her lip brushing ever so slightly at the bards.

"Keeland?! What are you doing here?"

The two women jumped in surprise and shock at the voice coming from behind Keeland's back, their hearts thumping wildly. _What is it with everyone interrupting us all the time!?_ Leliana thought to herself in frustration.

"Lanaya?"

* * *

**A/N: **Oooh! I know, I know what could Lanaya possibly be doing in Denerim?? Isn't she supposed to be hanging out, dancing underneath the moon, swaying in the brisk winds with the clan? Well, we'll see, won't we? I think I've said it earlier; this story does take a different path than the game. But the main plot is as the game, you know, collecting the army, killing the dragon. They are actually doing all this, but having spent nearly 80hrs on the game I reckon we all kind of already know that. ;) I will be writing _some _about it soon though.

I hope you enjoy!

Also, I am seriously looking for a good Betareader.... my last ones haven't been... that good.

So if anyone's interested please drop me a mail! :)


	8. One Night In Denerim

**A/N: **This chapter is **M-RATED **for adult themes. As always it's nothing really graphic or explicit. Not according to me, but hey I'm a Swede and we're kind of known to be rather open-minded and… not so uptight. ;) No but seriously, it's not bad at all, but I guess it's not very PG either. :P

Don't be shy or hesitate to review. :)

Enjoy!

* * *

**ONE NIGHT IN DENERIM**

KEELAND WAS SURPRISED TO SEE the young Dalish inside a shem tavern.

"Aneth ara Lethallan, what are _you _doing here?" She laughed in disbelief pulling the ash-blonde elf into a warm embrace.

The blonde elf smiled and placed a soft kiss on Keeland's neck. "I have missed you Lethallan. We haven't spoken since…"

"The last gathering. It has been too long." Keeland agreed smiling warmly. Last time they had met was during the Gathering of the clans. Keeland had travelled without Tamlen and met Lanaya. They had gotten along a little too well and Keeland had found herself wondering whether she and Tamlen really were meant for each other. It had passed though after she got home and met him again – of course, but it was why Tamlen always pointed out to her that she wasn't cut out for clan life afterwards. He used to smile and say, as open-minded and liberal as he might be he would like for his wife to consider being with him and only him one day. She had shrugged and said it wasn't a promise she could make at the time. He had grinned and kissed her saying that for now he honestly didn't mind.

Realizing they were still embracing each other she gave the ash-blonde elf a kiss on the cheek before releasing her. The bard seemed to have caught on to the chemistry between the two elves, and she squirmed awkwardly feeling a pang of jealousy.

"Oh, this is my… companion, Leliana." Keeland gestured towards the squirming bard. "The others are out there getting shit-faced." She laughed before adding, "this is Lanaya, an old… friend."

The bard and the elf nodded politely towards each other, Lanaya inhabiting a natural sort of weariness towards humans.

"But you must let me buy you something to drink. They only serve strange shemlen drinks. They are quite weak but work just fine." Keeland snickered.

"Yes, I think it's only fair since you left me hanging last time. Come, let's talk." Lanaya winked mysteriously.

The bard opened her mouth to excuse herself when she felt Keeland's fingers intertwine themselves with hers giving her hand a reassuring squeeze. She was pleasantly surprised at the warrior's affectionate display smiling like an Amaranthine cat as she trailed along after the dark-haired warden feeling as if her chest might explode.

---

---

"I am sorry about Tamlen." Lanaya said when Keeland returned from the bar. "I heard what happened to you and him."

Keeland answered with a slight nod seeing the templar flinch in the corner of her eye and the bard frowning a little. "So tell me, why are you here?" Keeland said putting the beer-filled flagons on the table in front of the elf who sat amongst the other companions looking small and insecure. Keeland smiled reassuringly and sat down.

"Zathrian sent me. We are having… difficulties in our clan at the moment." Lanaya said, glancing hesitantly at the strange group of individuals surrounding her.

Keeland caught the insecure glance. Speaking of clan business amongst outsiders was considered shameful and she could see why Lanaya paused. "It's ok. If we can help, I'm sure Zathrian won't mind you telling us."

Lanaya nodded slowly. "There is this curse that has affected many of our brothers and sisters. The curse of the werewolves, they're turning our people, more and more going missing or being killed each day. Zathrian said there is a way to cure our people."

"There is? How?" Keeland narrowed her eyes. Zathrian had never appealed much to her, he seemed bitter and harsh in his appearance and it was something about him she did not trust and she knew better than not to listen to her instincts.

"Zathrian spoke of some sort of host, some sort of creature that must be killed for the curse to break, but he will not send in any more of our warriors. He says we have lost too many and the few left are far too important to risk losing. We cannot lose our crafts master or the elders… And the young hunters and warriors have not enough experience." Lanaya sounded resigned.

"I can see this being a problem, but it still doesn't explain what you're doing here."

"Around the same time as you left your clan a new sister arrived to ours, Ardara Tabris. She was conscripted to the grey wardens after she was involved in the murder of an arl's son, but she fled Denerim without them and joined our clan."

Keeland felt a slight surprise. Another elf recruited to the wardens? She remembered arriving at Ostagar feeling like some exotic trained pet everyone liked to stare at. One of the merchant's had nearly gotten his throat sliced when rudely demanding to know what she had done to his armour, asking why she was dressed as a warrior. She had snarled at him that he best watch his filthy shemlen tongue or she'd cut it out. She wondered what it would have been like if there had been another elf _woman _there besides her. Perhaps she would have dealt with this whole thing better, perhaps not, according to what Lanaya had said she'd been a flat-ear after all…

"She fled to the Dalish? Why?" Even though she asked the question she knew the answer. She had felt it herself. Joining some shemlen organization fighting some blight, leaving everything she knew behind, being surrounded by ignorant shems. When Duncan had recruited her and the Keeper sent her away she had protested loudly and whole-heartedly, at first completely refusing to go. She felt cast away, shunned by her own clan, and it had mortified her, but then the Keeper had taken her to the side explaining this was the only way, that the even the elves were obliged to help the grey wardens. Keeland had agreed then, knowing her Keeper would never send her away were it not for the fact she did not want to see her become corrupted and die from the taint.

"Ardara wouldn't subject to the humans she said. She stayed with the clan for a few months until she heard of what happened in the alienage here in Denerim and she left the clan to come back for her family. She hasn't returned to the clan yet and Zathrian sent me to see if I could get any new as of what happened to her. She left just before she was going to venture in to the Brecilian forest and help end the curse."

"And did you find out anything?" Keeland asked the small elf.

"I can't get into the alienage. It's been shut off since… since the humans purged it… I don't know anything. Not of Ardara or her family and the guards won't let me in. I considered using magic, but there are too many guards."

"How can people be so cruel?" The bard murmured before Morrigan turned to the templar and narrowed her eyes.

"Ah, Alistair, another apostate for you. Shall we assume she is yet another threat to Ferelden and the Chantry?"

Alistair shot her a sour glare. "I'm _not _a templar."

"Oh yes, I forgot you failed your training." The witch sneered.

"I didn't!" Alistair protested.

"Shut up the both of you." Keeland snarled and the two companions before turning to Lanaya who studied them with curious eyes. "There is not much you can do here. You should return to your Keeper. Tell him we need to speak to him about helping us stand against the blight."

Lanaya shook her head. "Though I know you are right I don't know if he will agree. We have not the resources to help you."

"Tell him I'll help him break the curse. I would go there instantly if it were not for the matter of the arl of Redcliffe. Tell Zathrian we shall be there in a few weeks time. Can you manage for so long?"

"I don't know. It is not like we have a choice, but I urge you to hurry. We cannot stand against the werewolf attacks if we keep losing our warriors to the curse."

Keeland nodded thoughtfully sipping on her ale. The companions had started to retreat to their rooms and she and Lanaya had been left alone accompanied by a sleeping bard.

"She seems nice." Lanaya said and smiled towards the bard leaning into the warden. "For a shem." She added with a wink.

Keeland laughed. "She is…"

"I am sorry about Tamlen…" Lanaya said carefully bringing the subject up again.

"Ma serannas Lethallan." She glanced over at Leliana.

"You seem to be coping well though…" Lanaya half joked, half asked.

"But I didn't… losing Tamlen was the worst thing that happened to me. Some days I didn't even know how to breathe. I did things I'm not proud of while mourning him the most, but letting go of him was the hardest…"

Lanaya placed her soft hand on Keeland's looking into her eyes. "Letting go doesn't mean we forget." Then her eyes turned towards Leliana. "She's a lucky girl. Though the clans are going to be… less ecstatic about it I suppose."

Keeland snickered. "I'm not even sure she's… that she… err…"

Lanaya laughed heartily. "You know Keeland, you swept me off my feet when we first met, moved with such predatory manner, taking what you wanted. I don't think I've seen you act like this. What is it you're not sure of? Have you not seen how she looks at you? She follows you as if you were the one true thing in here. She looks at you with such admiration and respect it is impossible not to notice."

"Really? You think so? I'm not so sure…"

Lanaya shook her head. "I best be off, I don't particularly like these shem cities and you better get her to bed."

"You're right." She said standing up. "Tell Zathrian to expect us in a short time."

"Travel safely." Lanaya whispered before leaning in for a kiss, and then she turned around and disappeared into the dark night.

---

---

Keeland scooped up the lithe bard carrying her slowly towards her room. Her shoulder protested and she gritted her teeth when the bard buried her face at the root of Keeland's throat soft lips brushing against her skin.

"You must look so silly." She murmured tiredly.

"Is that so?" Keeland snorted amusedly.

"So little carrying someone like me." The bard snickered.

"I hate to burst your bubble, but you aren't that big yourself…"

Leliana grunted before drifting off to sleep again.

Placing the bard in her room Keeland stood staring at her for a moment slightly unsure of what to do. Should she leave? Stay? Stay just a while? Leave before dawn? How did shems do this? She frowned. They had slept next to each other in her tent, but that was different. This bed was… small. It barely fit the bard and if Keeland were to lie next to her she would have to be pressed closed to the bard, inappropriately close…

Deciding it was better to be safe rather than sorry she turned to leave when Leliana's hand came up grabbing her gently by the wrist.

"Oh no warden, don't you leave a girl hanging." The bard muttered tugging gently.

Keeland smiled in spite of herself, sliding down behind the bard in the small bed. The bard had slithered out of the linen trousers she wore earlier and laid half-naked underneath the warm cover.

Keeland gulped a little when she felt the red-head's naked thighs pressed closely to her own. Not really knowing where else to put her hand she put it carefully on her thigh. Leliana's skin felt soft underneath her hand and she slowly let her fingers run across her toned thigh coming to a stop at her hip. Kissing the bard on her exposed neck she closed her eyes to sleep when the bard jolted her hip slightly, indicating for the warden not to stop. Tracing the bard's side she came to a stop on her ribs.

The bard turned her head a little. "Why are you stopping warden?" She murmured.

Keeland hesitated wondering if this might cause any trouble as it had with Alistair, but before she could over think it the bard grabbed her hand a guided it to softer regions. Slightly sighing at the pleasure it brought her. The bard twisted around in the bed kissing the warrior feverously, demanding her attention. Keeland was happy to oblige, running passionate hands across the bard's toned body. Leliana broke free and tugged at her tunic. Keeland helped her with it before releasing her own body from its heavy linen shell. It seemed clothes had never weighed more.

The bard's skin felt hot against her own and it glistened in the dim light. Leliana pressed herself onto her hand, writhing underneath her, breathing heavily, whispering wondrous secrets in her ear, soft moans and gasp revealed the pleasure Keeland brought her.

Leliana couldn't think properly, Keeland was everywhere, hands and lips. Her breathing increased along with Keeland's. Then they both tensed, skin, hands, lips, and bodies merging into one, adrenalin rushing through their bodies. The bard squeezed her eyes shut her faint gasps coming in thrusts. Her body trembling until it yielded and a pleasurable yelp escaped her lips.

The elf lay still next to her, her face buried behind her ear. The bard pulled her closer drinking in the feel of their naked skin pressed close.

The elf kissed her neck before murmuring. "I thought you were asleep…"

Leliana chuckled. "Fooled you."


	9. The Sins Of A Lover

**THE SINS OF A LOVER**

LELIANA WOKE UP IN TANGLE of legs and arms, the warden's long, silky hair covering her pale body like a veil. The bard watched her sleep, her lips slightly parted, breathing slowly, her ribcage rising and falling. Her left arm embraced the bard and the other one was tucked in underneath her pillow. It was unusual to see Keeland like this, calm and serene. Behind her eyelids fluttered dreams and fantasies and the bard wondered what she dreamt. Something nice perhaps? She was smiling slightly in her sleep. Deciding they deserved the rest she closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep again.

They had left Denerim by noon and were trailing their way through a deep and lush gully, the bard smiling to herself most of the time knowing full-well the companions looked at her as if she was behaving even more odd than usual. She glanced over at Keeland her face turning red with a blush when she thought about last night. The warden looked up from scanning the ground and grinned when she saw the bard watching her giving her a small wink and Alistair who was walking next to her frowned.

"So, who could have guessed that?" He said to Keeland, referring to the incident at Brother Genitivi's house.

"Well Leliana did say there was something strange going on with Weylon." The elf pointed out.

Alistair clenched his fists into little balls biting his tongue.

"Is everything ok?" She asked looking at him with concern.

"I'm fine it's nothing. I'm just sick of..." He caught himself before continuing.

"Sick of what?" Keeland asked.

_Sick of you talking about Leliana! _"Nothing, I just have a bad headache and..." He couldn't come up with anything else to excuse himself with.

She stopped him, laying a mail-clad hand on his chest. "Has this got anything to do with meeting your sister? Are you sure everything went ok in there?"

The night before at the Gnawed Tavern Alistair had told them about his long lost sister and how he had found out she lived in Denerim and that he was thinking of going to visit her in the morning. Everyone but Morrigan had encouraged him, and Keeland had even offered to accompany him should he feel the need for moral support. He had politely declined her kind offer, though he had regretted going on his own later on. His sister had apparently not been everything he dreamed of. She was nothing but a bitter woman who even after Alistair had given her all the gold he owned had wanted more.

He shook his head. "I just thought it would play out differently."

"You know, people are selfish and as much as I hate to say it, everyone's out for themselves..." Keeland said carefully knowing the templar was a little naïve and gullible when it came to other peoples intentions.

The tall warden sighed and threw his hands in the air. "Well... does _everyone _have to be like that?"

"You know what. Let's make camp for today. We should get something to eat, we haven't stopped since noon." She raised her hand signing for the companions to make camp and gave him an encouraging pat on the back. "Come on soldier, let's go dip our stinking toes into that lake down there and let the others set camp and cook."

She could see a smile tug at the corner of his mouth before she turned around and led the way to the lake.

She pulled off her boots and put her feet in the cool waters of the lake. Alistair squealed a little at the sensation of the cool waters.

"Ugh! Alistair! Chuck your boots further away, they stink!" Keeland exclaimed pinching her nose shut.

The templar laughed and chucked his boots further away. "It's not that bad is it?"

Keeland grunted a little before leaning in against his strong shoulder. Travelling was wearing on the whole group and considering the lack of sleep from last night she was feeling unusually tried and the heavy chainmail was bearing down on her. They sat like that for a long time watching the ripples of the water, Alistair telling her about himself, about his time at the Chantry. She was nearly drifting off to sleep when Morrigan called out to them.

Alistair turned around. "It's the swooping with of the wilds. I thought you'd crawled into a bush and died."

"No more than you would grow brains any day soon." She said turning her face to Keeland. "Dinner is ready and ginger is pestering me about blue velvet dresses, staring at my breasts, show her yours and silence her!"

Keeland's head snapped to the side blushing involuntary. "What? No! You can't say stuff like that."

"No? I thought I just did. Hmm... strange." She grinned and walked back up to the campsite.

"Argh, she is so insolent some times." Keeland shook her head.

"_Some _times?" Alistair said incredulously before rolling over grabbing for his reeking boot.

---

---

"Who is Tamlen? The name seemed upset Alistair last night." Leliana had seen the two wardens talking intimately earlier before going off to sit by the lake laughing and talking. Keeland had leaned into her fellow warden and Leliana had – much to her dismay, felt a little jealous, still very much aware of the history the two of them had.

Keeland stared at her hands. She hadn't told anyone but Alistair, but she guessed that the red-haired bard had the right to know. "He was my best friend... my lover, my betrothed. "

"You... you're betrothed? I-I never knew that." The bard stammered.

"I'm... he... we..." The bard cut her off.

"You're _betrothed_."

"Well, I guess, technically, but..."

"TECHNICALLY?!" the bard's eyes nearly popped. The image of Keeland frolicking with both her and the templar while her betrothed sat at home was too much for her.

"Yes, well..." Keeland started.

"Maker, I've been a fool..." She mumbled distrustfully before turning her back against Keeland walking off to her tent.

---

---

How could she have been so guileless? The warrior had been so flattering, giving her such thoughtful gifts and compliments, and last night... had it all been just for fun, pastime, for the warrior whereas the bard had fallen for the irresistible woman? And all along she'd been betrothed, her heart already claimed by someone else.

She wiped the tears from her face feeling stupid.

But what about last night she had made love to her with such passion and desire. Then there was the fact how they had taken to always place themselves next to each other. Realizing how much it had meant to her and how little for Keeland made her heart ache more than just a little.

---

---

"I take it that did not go well. Not that I was eavesdropping." Morrigan said handing Keeland her bowl with food.

Keeland shook her head.

"Ah... you are quite the heartbreaker you Dalish little devil. First the poncy templar boy and now the saucy little bard. I cannot wait until it's my turn." Zevran chuckled in his antivan flirtatious voice.

"Oh shut up Zevran!"

"Ah! Is she as feisty in the bedroll?" He raised his eyebrow at Alistair who was glaring needles and pins at him.

"Zevran you are _not _making things any better!" She said annoyed and swatted him across the back of his head.

The blonde elf chuckled and winked. "She _is _quite the little firecracker."

"'Tis true what he says." Morrigan shot in.

"Really? You think I'm a little firecracker?" Keeland narrowed her eyes.

Morrigan scoffed. "'Tis not what I'm saying, but you _are _a heartbreaker."

"I'm not!"

"No? Canoodling around while your beloved Tamlen awaits your return. I don't blame you, I would do it too. It's merely lust and passion, he needn't know."

Keeland spun around fire blazing from her angry eyes. "You're all a bunch of shem idiots!" She yelled and shoved the witch aside before she stormed off.

---

---

"You really are a bunch of idiots." Alistair said where they sat around the campfire.

"Oh look, it speaks again." Morrigan taunted him.

Leliana sat quiet staring into the fire, picking crumbs off the bread she'd been holding on to for the past few hours ever since the warden had stormed off.

"You are aware of the fact that her betrothed died, right? From the taint. She was in the room when he died and was tainted herself. That was one small reason Duncan recruited her." The templar said watching the other companions' reactions.

Wynne shook her head slightly. "Poor child and none of us even knew about the grief she must have felt. It must not have been easy for her."

Zevran looked as if he realized he was in fact about to die whenever the warden decided to return. Even Morrigan looked a little ashamed.

_That would be a first. Miracles do happen! _Alistair thought to himself.

Sten looked – as always, indifferent.

The bard on the other hand dropped her bread and looked as if she had blood on her hands. He'd been watching the two of them for a couple of days and by the looks of it they were acting like two young mage apprentices experiencing the first brush of love.

He scowled. It wasn't that he didn't like Leliana, it was just that... he didn't like her enough to want to see _her _with Keeland. In fact, it annoyed him and when Keeland had kissed Leliana by the campfire he had thought he would explode with jealousy. Though he did take some comfort in that Leliana at least hadn't... well, so far nothing had happened. Right? At least nothing the others knew about and they would know. They might have kissed, but it hadn't been anything like what had happened between Keeland and himself.

It sent a jolt through his stomach to think of how she had absorbed him, running her hands through his hair and down his back, her mouth biting his bottom lip. Then he remembered who she had been with in her mind and he became gloomy again. Feeling miserable he did take enjoyment in the fact that the bard had probably infuriated Keeland with this whole situation. He smirked smugly before catching a glimpse of the sad-eyed bard. How could anyone take enjoyment in such deep sadness?

_You're such an arse! _He thought, groaning at himself.

He strode over to the bard squatting in front of her. "Are you ok?" He asked sincerely, feeling stupid.

"Oh, I'm ok." The bard tried to sound cheerful.

He smiled. "Don't worry. She won't be too mad, take it from someone who's pissed her off enough times to know." He placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

The bard looked up at him smiling sadly. "I'm fine, I know you like her too, you don't have to..."

The templar sighed and sat down next to her. "We both lo... like her, but I know she won't be choosing me anytime soon. Quite frankly I'm not sure she'll choose anyone but Tamlen..." He didn't say it to be spiteful or bring the bard's spirit down, he said it because he honestly didn't know and looking at the bard's face he could see his own uncertainty mirrored in her blue eyes.

---

---

Too caught up in the evenings revelations none of the companions noticed the seven pair of eyes observing them.

"Find her and kill her."

* * *

**A/N: **Well, I promised someone an update last night, but an invitation to a nightclub for gaming nerds got the better of me so I went out and got shit-faced instead. ;) Thus however breaking a promise, so in an effort to make it up.... two updates in **one **night!

We all know who owns DA:O, it most certainly is not me. Only Keeland, she's mine, mine, mine!

Hope you enjoy and thanks to everyone for subscribing, adding to favourites, reading and reviewing, You all make this so much more fun than what it already is! :D thanks!

Hope you keep enjoying the story!


	10. Deception

**DECEPTION**

THEY STOOD ON A BOULDER facing the small camp, observing the group in the gully. Thanks to the cliffs surrounding the gully and the lake, sounds drifted easily up to where they stood enabling them to hear every word that was spoken. The elvish warden had stormed out of the camp and the group had been quiet and solemn ever since. The sun had set since she had stormed off and shadows were creeping out from behind trees and stones along with the impenetrable darkness.

"It its time." He said gesturing for the scouts.

A young man came running towards him. "Yes Ser?"

"Find out where she is and do it quickly. I want Kargan and Duer on it."

The scout nodded and ran up to a tall elvish woman and her human companion. They looked stern and cold, they pulled their hoods up, nodding as they disappeared in to the dark woods.

---

---

Keeland was fuming where she sat on the thick branch dangling her legs.

Those imbecilic shems! Talking over her head as if she was not there! She hated it when people wouldn't listen to her. If they would just have let her explain, this whole misunderstanding could have been solved in a jiffy. But Morrigan had to go and open her mouth and instead of keeping her temper she'd yelled at them before storming off. She sighed, why did things always have to be so complicated? She knew Leliana was thinking the worst of her and perhaps it would have been better if she had just gone after her and talked to her, but would she understand? Would she question why Keeland hadn't said anything? Would she think Keeland had only used her in the same way she had used Alistair?

In truth Keeland had been so focused on the bard she had forgotten about Tamlen. It both scared her and excited her, making her stomach flip. It excited her because it made her feel alive, and it scared her because she was forgetting Tamlen. She no longer remembered the sound of his voice, or what he looked like when waking up in the morning. She couldn't remember the small things and it scared her. It wasn't that she didn't love him, she did, but he was gone. When thinking about the bard she wasn't sure if she would not have reacted to her in the same way had he been alive.

She furrowed her eyebrows. The bard made her stomach flip... she made her want to throw her hands in the air and run in silly circles squealing gleefully. It was something that had snuck up on her, she wasn't planning on wanting to behave like this. She was planning on spending the rest of her life with a ghost. The n the charismatic and adorable Chantry girl had forced herself in to her life, pestering her with her endless questions and probing. Even though Keeland had acted as if she disliked it, it had made her feel as if she existed. But now Leliana probably thought she only had her to fulfil her sexual needs. _Because she wouldn't listen! _By the gods it was infuriating how poorly those shems seemed to communicate! This would never have happened if she had been an elf.

"I said '_**was**_' you know!" She muttered to herself.

This was the reason elves rarely interacted with humans. Maybe this whole thing wasn't such a good idea after all? What did she have to offer the bard anyway? A life battling darkspawns, a... wait! What was she thinking? There was nothing to say the bard even thought of her in that way. Perhaps the bard had used _her _and not the other way around! She was a _bard _after all and she had heard _loud and clear _what Leliana had told her about bards. Blasted... this was all going to end badly, she knew it. Perhaps it was time to climb down and get this over with...

---

---

"We've found her Ser. She is with that group, but has separated herself from them." Kargan reported to the tall chainmail-clad man.

"Well done. Where is she to be found?"

"She's just outside the camp area. We could take her out without anyone noticing." The elf stated.

"Good, though I want them to part completely before you try anything." The man said handing her a rolled up parchment. She took it from him eyeing it. "It's a contract." He said nodding towards it.

"I care not what it is only what you want me to do with it." Kargan answered in a monotonous voice.

"Bring it and remind her about her deal with me."

"Is this before or after I kill her?"

The man snorted. "Just make sure you get the job done. You might want to bring a third man."

The elf nodded and turned around, Duer and a third rogue following her trails as she exited the camp.

"Three of them?" The chainmail-clad man asked turning to their leader.

"They'll be no match for her." She said confidently, crossing her arms a wicked smile creeping onto her face. She had planned this for months now. Oh! It was going to be beautiful and no one would know what hit them before it was too late. It was just like the good old days she mused to herself.

"It's a perfectly set trap." She said, something gleaming in her eyes.

---

---

Keeland was about to descend from the branches when her ear caught the rustling of leather amour. She snapped her head to the side straining her ears. The sound grew slightly stronger advancing on her. She closed her eyes concentrating.

There were three of them by the sound of their steps and they were all using stealth. Ha! Rogues so untrained a war mammoth would be more discrete. She snarled as she crouched on the ledge.

An elven woman was in the lead using her stealth quite well, but was in general stockier built than the average rogue. The two others followed closely behind, two humans. They weren't as well built as her and Keeland knew she would have to take them out first. Watching the last man, she noticed he was holding a small glowing orb of flames in one of his hands. She sneered. Naturally! A spellcaster, no good team ever went without. On its own a spellcaster wouldn't be much of a challenge, but put it with a strong group of companions and the spellcaster would become the most lethal of the combatants. She would have to take him out first, interesting how a mage would try and make it as a rogue though. Interesting and stupid in his case.

She dropped from the tree the second he passed underneath her making sure she landed on his shoulders. The sheer force and weight of her fall sent them tumbling. She landed with each thigh on his shoulders. She pressed tight with them using both her hands to break his neck with a snapping sound. The second rogue heard the ruckus and came charging at her, swinging his sword. She laughed and rolled over pulling the dead mage's short swords from their sheaths. She twirled them in her hands meeting the rogue half way. He swung his sword at her and she parried with a clinging sound. He might have been thinner than their leader, but he was quick and moved with efficiency making Keeland work for it. She jumped, rolled and ducked. Seeing her lower her guard for a slight second he took his chance jabbing his sword at her with a long movement. She was quicker than him though and twisted her body and she caught his arm between her hands. There was barely time for him to realize what had happened before her sword cut through his throat separating head from body. She heard the elven woman – still using stealth, bolt towards her behind her back. Dropping to her knees she whirled one of the swords just in time to penetrate the elf as she lunged herself at her arms raised high above her head. She dropped to the ground with a dull thud.

Keeland studied the three rogues. It was no coincidence they were out here sneaking around and her suspicion was that it was another one of Loghain's hired mercenaries. She knelt by the elf and dug through her pockets. When she couldn't find anything she stood up again surveying the body. Strange, she had expected to find _something_. She saw a small leather pouch and found a typical elven made cluinn, a tiny tool used when hunting. Peering more closely she saw something was sticking out from the elf's boot and she pulled it out.

It was a rolled up parchment. "Interesting." She said to herself as she unrolled it. The contract to kill her and her companions bore the crest of Loghain and wore two signatures at the bottom, one which she assumed was Loghain's and one... she inhaled sharply when she saw the familiar swirly signature. It could not have been more familiar had the bard drawn little hearts around her name as she had in the Gnawed Tavern. Her head pounded and she felt as if someone had punched her in her stomach. She fell to her knees feeling sick her head spinning. Here she was worrying about what Leliana might be thinking of the whole Tamlen thing, worrying that she might think Keeland had manipulated her, while all along she had been spying on them reporting back to Loghain! Reading the contract again she got up to her feet a newborn rage burning within her. Grabbing the decapitated man's head she ran back towards the camp the taste of blood filling her senses.

---

---

They saw the elvish warden bustle into the camp tossing the head in the middle of the camp. The older woman jumped at the sight of the rolling head and all heads turned as she stalked up to the red-haired bard.

"It is working. She found the forged contract." The woman said with satisfaction where she stood watching the display below them.

The warden shoved the bard in the chest with such strength she fell backwards with a surprised yelp.

"Hey, hey, hey! What are you doing?! She's sorry, she _didn't_ know!" The blonde warden with short cropped hair exclaimed pushing to his feet.

The elf was on top of the shocked and frightened woman. "YOU LIED TO ME! YOU STUPID WENCH! DID YOU NOT THINK I WOULD FIGURE IT OUT?!" She roared at her grabbing her throat pointing her sharpened sword at her.

The companions flew to their feet, but before anyone could reach the elf and the bard the elvish woman's voice called out a warning. "Just you _try _it and I'll slit her lying throat. And do _not _for one second think I won't kill you for trying to stop me!" There was madness in the woman's voice.

"Keeland please..." The bard begged.

"Be silent!" she warned the bard. "Look at the parchment." She instructed the others. "She's been spying on us all along! Reporting to Loghain."

The companions all stared in disbelief at the contract Alistair was holding in his hand. Then they stared at the bard shaking their heads slowly backing off.

"I haven't Keeland! I swear! I would never. I... I _love _you."

"Your words mean nothing to me _Lethallan_." The elf hissed. "Now leave and pray to our Maker that I never see you again for I will cut your treacherous heart out."

The group of mercenaries standing on the cliff watched the bard get up casting a final glance at her former companions before turning around, leaving them in silence.

"This was too easy!" The woman said in her rich orlesian accent. "I sometimes wonder why I expect more of elves. She bought it so easily, stupid knife-ear." Marjolaine's eyes twinkled as she thought of the bard. Hurt, betrayed and broken again, and alone.

The game had begun.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **dadadadadadadada.... *humming the Jaws theme* things are heating up!

To start off with, a big **fat **THANK YOU to **_Nerdtron_** for beta-reading this – you are the best!

Thank you thank you!

I hope I've left you wanting more and tugging your hair and hating me just a little for letting them mess things up. I'm well aware that this does not happen in the game, but like I said earlier I'm stirring the pot a bit. ;)

Thanks once again for all the wonderful reviews! Keep them coming, if you want to. :)

And as always... enjoy! ;)


	11. Seeing Is Believing

**SEEING IS BELIEVING **

MARJOLAINE'S EYES FOLLOWED THE BARD as she ventured further north leaving the wardens behind. She leered and revelled in the bard's misery. The bard was all hers now, Marjolaine grinned wickedly uttering to herself, "We have so much to catch up on."

The older woman swayed her curvaceous hips in her trademark style as she trailed next to her horse descending the cliff the mercenaries had camped on, leaving it scattered with corpses.

She laughed when she thought of how easy it had been to lay the trap. In some ways it was disappointing that it had been so effortless, but what could one expect from a simple minded savage? Now there was nothing and no one to stop her from doing what she wanted to the bard and there were _a lot _of things she sought to do to the bard.

A predatory smile grew on her lips as images of the naked virgin bard blushing heavily underneath her swirled before her eyes. She remembered how she had taught the young girl how to manipulate men and women, using them for the benefit of others. Leliana had been a good student, but her downfall came from her heart. Something Marjolaine had ridden herself of many years ago. She wouldn't say she loved the bard – she loved the _feel_ of the bard, loved how she writhed underneath her, or how she could go from being passive to utterly dominating. But love? No, love was something she saved for herself and it had gotten her this far.

She had watched Leliana ever since she arrived in the filthy town of Lothering, wondering what she was up to. This whole Chantry girl act was not befitting a bard such as Leliana and Marjolaine was certain there was something else brewing. She had stalked the group ever since they left Lothering together and schemed and planned until tonight's event. She chuckled, had Leliana really been so gullible to believe she wouldn't find her? She would of course dispense of her, but not before... enjoying her thoroughly. Although the red-head would need a proper bath first. Even if she wasn't sure it would wash off that filthy elf's touch. She shuddered at the thought of the warden touching, fondling, and playing with _her _toy. She might not love her, but she did not want some filthy savage ravaging what she regarded as hers. It pleasured her to no end knowing that the warden had cast the bard aside leaving her vulnerable and easy prey.

There was no escaping her now.

---

---

The bard was still in shock, her body and hands shaking terribly and she wasn't sure whether she would laugh or cry. When Keeland had come storming towards her, her eyes had burned with such hatred it had nearly stunned the bard. She had felt Keeland's whole body shove her before she fell to the ground and for a moment the camp had erupted into chaos. Keeland had grabbed her by the throat staring her in the eyes, though to her surprise the rage was gone, replaced by concern and... a furrowed brow '_Trust me_'_. _She had mouthed before thrusting the sword up against her throat. Then Keeland had roared at her all the while her eyes reassured the bard to trust her.

Leliana had played along with the warden's act knowing from experience that trusting Keeland in certain situations – no matter how strange they seemed, always saved your life.

She unfolded a small note the warden had pushed inside the top of her amour. She smiled a little when she saw it. Keeland had a terrible handwriting and her spelling was atrocious.

_Sum one is treing to frajme jou, sep arating jou fram the grup. Hid north we'll ca tch up wit jou. _

She snickered a little as she rushed through the forest. Reading the note she was more than sure of who was trying to frame her. It could only be Marjolaine, but why now? Why after all this time? How did she find her? She glanced across her shoulders knowing that the orlesian master bard was trailing her. When would Keeland catch up with her?

It was a strange feeling to be fleeing again, and it reminded her too much of her flight from Orlais, only this time she had someone who was doing her best to protect her. She wanted her there with her, wanted the warden's safe arms around her. What if Marjolaine caught up with her before Keeland did? What if she was overpowered and killed? She hadn't had time to over-think it when she blurted out the words to Keeland. _I love you_. They sounded so... small and cliché. The warden had been unable to say anything, but she called her _Lethallan _that's what you called someone you deeply cared for, that much Keeland had told her. Did that mean Keeland... loved her?

She shook her head returning to reality and the danger following her like a dark shadow. She sped up taking great care in hiding her tracks knowing if it was indeed Marjolaine following her it would not stop her from finding her. But she also knew Marjolaine was far too arrogant to think that the elf could have outwitted her. She smiled almost proudly when she thought of how clever Keeland must have been to unmask Marjolaine's well plotted scheme to frame Leliana once again. Knowing that whatever happened this time, Marjolaine wouldn't win. She reached deep within herself pulling the long forgotten master bard from within to the surface.

The game had begun.

---

---

Everyone had been taken aback when the warden sprinted up to the Chantry girl knocking her off her feet. She had tossed a man's head in the middle of the camp as she came running. So caught up in the commotion most of them failed to notice the sign carved into the cheeks of the bodiless head. Everyone save Wynne who jumped to her feet in an effort to see what the markings indicated. It was the runic sign for danger and deceit.

The templar had rushed to his feet before she could warn him that they were all in danger and that they ought to play along with their leader's act. When Keeland had ordered them to look at the contract they had done so. It was the contract of their death signed by theirs truly, Leliana. At the bottom the elf had scribbled in nearly unreadable letters, and in a most interesting spelling the word 'forged'. It was a clever way of letting them know that things were not as they seemed and they had all backed off, even the stubborn witch played the part.

They packed up camp and left only moments after the bard. Keeland made sure they went south instead of north making it look as if they were parting ways. What their enemies did not know was that Keeland was born and raised in these parts and knew the forests like the back of her hand. Going south may seem like parting, but Keeland new a shortcut through the pass south of the gully thery were camping in. They would just round the gully, taking them north and meet up with the bard by dawn.

Sten watched the resolute elf walk in the lead with her dog. "How do you know the document was forged?" He asked her sternly.

"What?" She turned to look at him and he knew she was surprised he even spoke.

"The others are willing to follow you blindly, I'm not." He answered concisely.

"Because she's left-handed, whoever forged her signature on that parchment is right-handed."

"And you can tell, how?" He asked distrustfully.

"Pressure points. It's quite simple really, right-handed have a single pressure point for each letter, you could think of it like a dot. Left-handed persons use a different angle when writing which means they have longer pressure points. The signature on the parchment doesn't." The elf answered matter-of-factly.

"Very well." Sten answered as monotonous as ever. "Why didn't we take them out? You are a grey warden, are you not? If you were you could have easily dispersed of them."

Something flared in the elf's eyes. "Because they had us trapped from both sides of the gully with their ranged fighters. We didn't have a chance fighting them from there, not even with Wynne healing and Morrigan's spells. They would take them out first. I can't risk their lives just because you got it into your thick skull that it would have worked and because you think I need to prove something to you." She snapped at him.

"A fair answer." The big quanari said before he fell back, taking his normal position in the back of the group.

Keeland shook her head tiredly. It had been a long day, much too long for her taste. And even thought it had started off more than good waking up next to a naked bard, it had gone downhill ever since they made camp. Much to her relief all this commotion had made everyone forget about what had happened earlier that night and in all honesty Keeland would be quite happy for it to remain that way.

She thought about the bard's frightened eyes when she had knocked her off her feet, but how she had completely trusted her once Keeland had mouthed the words '_trust me' _to her. Then there had been the change in the bard's eye going from scared, to trusting, to... something deeper.

_I love you_.

Leliana's words rung in her ear and she felt something tug at her heart when she thought of the sincerity in her voice. She closed her eyes thinking it was as if history was repeating itself. They'd been upset with each other because of a stupid misunderstanding and now she was gone, and there was no way for Keeland to control what happened to the bard until dawn broke pressuming she would be able to meet them by then. Pushing the thoughts away she concentrated on picking their way through that pitch-black night pressing on to reach the bard in time.

---

---

She stood in the shadows watching the bard. Something seemed to have changed within the bard, as if she had found new strength and she moved with a new sense of determination. Marjolaine smiled to herself. Leliana was still the bard she always knew her to be. She was _her _creation, a weapon as deadly as the curved bow she wore strapped to her back.

Marjolaine thought back to the day when she had taught the young woman to use the bow. She had been so eager, so willing to please the older woman. That's how she had started out, naïve and guileless desperate for Marjolaine's approval. Towards the end however she was as fierce and dangerous as her master. She was fearless and quick, moving faster than the speed of light, melting into the shadows. She could have owned the world with her, but as Marjolaine had discovered, the bard had not yet been able to shed herself of emotions, and her downfall came with those letters. None save Leliana, had seen the original documents. Thus leaving Orlais after escaping from the dungeons she had become Marjolaine's biggest threat. Alas she would have to dispose of her little toy.

Moving as agile as a cat, stalking her prey Marjolaine savoured the excitement she felt knowing it wouldn't be long before she would confront the bard. She knew the adrenalin would arouse her. Smiling she nodded to herself and kept to the shadows patiently stalking the bard.

---

---

Something moved behind the bards back. She sneered. It was Marjolaine, she really had become very predictable. She paced up, pretending not to have heard her. She wanted her ex lover to think that she had the upper hand, as long as she did she was at an advantage and if Keeland's plan worked out the orlesian lady would no longer bother her.

It enraged the bard. Not only did Marjolaine have her thrown into the dungeons to be tortured and broken in every way possible, now that she had found some sense of happiness she had nearly managed to destroy that too. Had Keeland not been as attentive and intelligent as she was... the bard shuddered at the thought. She tried to imagine that the act they had put on had been for real and it made her want to hide. But no. Marjolaine had done it this time. She would not come between her and Keeland. She would not allow the master bard to ruin her life once again. This would end here.

She came to a halt. Dawn was breaking and this was where she and her companion's paths would cross. The glade lay quite and serene, no signs of the others. She shrugged it didn't matter. She would confront Marjolaine on her own. This was her battle. She lay down on the ground, her back towards the opening of the glade, waiting. Marjolaine would announce her presence sooner or later.

It didn't take long before she heard the orlesian's throaty chuckle.

"My Leliana, you have become careless." She said in a sultry voice.

Leliana sat up slowly turning around to face her enemy. "I _knew _it was you. What do you want?"

"Ah Leliana." She purred. "I wanted to see you of course."

_You could have just sent her a letter. _She heard Keeland's voice in her head. Leliana laughed a high-pitched hysterical laughter. "You do not just want to see me. Why have you followed me?"

Marjolaine advanced on the bard who stood up, her arms folded across her chest. "I've been watching you for quite some time. You've been holed up in Lothering ever since you left Orlais and suddenly you just get up and leave?"

"What are you saying?"

"The documents Leliana. You want your revenge, hm? Is that why you left? You know I couldn't just let you run off with the information you have on me."

"You're insane. I want nothing to do with you, you ruined my life." The bard said furiously her eyes watching the older woman intently as she stopped barely an arm's length away.

Marjolaine smiled slyly stepping closer to the bard searching her eyes. "What is this Chantry girl act about? You were never the chaste sort of girl." Her lips brushed against the bard's as her hand grabbed her firm breast.

Leliana let the older woman kiss her, her body pressed tight to hers. "You know nothing of me. I am not the same person." She mumbled through the kisses. Marjolaine seemed to take great pleasure in kissing the bard merely chuckling in response.

"I know everything about you Leliana. How you react, how you think, how you want to be _fucked_."

Leliana knew what she was doing. She chuckled inwardly, death by seducing? How very unoriginal. She let the woman lower her onto the ground, she'd done this act many times before, this was no different. Moaning in to the orlesian's mouth she grabbed her by the hips pulling her close. Marjolaine's hands were everywhere tainting her body. One minute she was pushing her hand between the bard's thighs the next the dark-haired beauty screamed in pain rolling over.

The bard twisted her body and rose to her feet. Marjolaine stared in disbelief at Leliana touching her cheek where she'd been cut. The blood poured down and she grimaced, anger blazing from her eyes.

Leliana braced herself when she watched Marjolaine pull out her swords, a crazy look upon her face.

"Ah Leliana, you should at least let me make you feel good before I killed you."

"You will not kill me. You have no power over me." The bard hissed swinging her daggers to emphasize her words.

Marjolaine laughed a sinister crackle before she let out a whistle, glancing over her back.

Leliana realized Marjolaine could not have been so foolish she did not bring her trusty mages and bowyers. Gulping a little she feared the worst, but much to her surprise nothing happened. Marjolaine frowned ever so slightly, but the bard caught a glimpse of it. She repeated her whistle.

Spruce branches rustled, twigs snapped, and bushes were pulled aside as the grand grey warden strode out form the forest the look of death upon her face. Both hands held out to her sides, the tips of the two long swords drew lines along the ground as she strode forward. She reminded Leliana of an arisen demon her eyes burning, dust swirling in the air around her. Leliana felt a strong feeling of terror surge from the warrior and had she not known the warden she would have been terrified. She saw Marjolaine quiver involuntary.

The deadly warden advanced on Marjolaine. "Looking for these?" She asked glancing to her left side.

Leliana and Marjolaine followed the warden's glance. Morrigan strode out from the shrubbery, two heads dangling from each of her hands. She tilted her head and smiled her sultry smile. From behind the warden and the witch the rest of the companions emerged blood splattered across their armours telling tales of how Marjolaine lost her companions. Leliana felt the group's support and trust in her surge through her whole body and she smiled at them, nodding as she charged at the surprised orlesian.

It was her and Marjolaine, they danced around each other while her companions stood like stoic statues in the background granting her the right to fight her old master herself. Marjolaine had not lost her skills and moved quickly the bard chasing after her. Jabbing and swinging her daggers. Her former master was agile as a cat and ducked the bard's attack cutting the bard across her ribs with her daggers. The numbness was instant. Bodhari root! She grimaced in pain feeling her right side numb off. Her arm felt heavy and protested when she tried to swing it.

Marjolaine's eyes glimmered with triumph. Leliana growled in frustration. In just a few minutes the bard's whole right side would stop functioning for a few seconds granting the deceitful orlesian with the kill. She could not allow it, she would not! Swinging her left arm at Marjolaine who easily dodged it she used her foot to trip her, a new trick she learnt from Morrigan when she was in the mood for sending the bard sprawling across the camp. Marjolaine yelped as she fell backwards. Leliana leapt on to her, arm raised above her head. Blue eyes meeting brown pleading for its life. She felt the dagger plunge itself into Marjolaine's throat, cutting through flesh, and sinews, muscles and cartilage with an eerie sound. There was a gurgling noise then the body went still underneath her weight. Staring in to her ex lover's lifeless eyes she buried her face in her hands and cried.

---

---

* * *

**A/N: **So... a different take on how Leliana got to finish Marjolaine off. I hope you liked it. :)

And please don't tease Keeland about her spelling, she told me she's planning payback for writing about it...... ;)

A huge thanks to Nerdtron for not only beta-reading, but also adding to the story with her great advice and kind encouragement! ^^

If you like don't hesitate to review it.

Till next time!

/Elmjuniper


	12. Reawakening

**REAWAKENING**

THE BARD LAY IN HER BEDROLL staring at the opposite side of the tent. She could still remember her dagger burying itself in her ex lover's throat with an unpleasant sound. When she realized Marjolaine was dead a mixed feeling of release, victory, anger, and sadness ensued her and she wept uncontrollably into her hands.

Marjolaine had done such terrible things to her, she had used her and betrayed her, still it did not mean the bard's heart had gotten over her easily. She had cried herself to sleep endless nights wondering what she had done to make Marjolaine hate her so. This morning she had realized that Marjolaine didn't hate her, nor love her, she simply used her.

She could feel Marjolaine's deceitful hands all over her body, touching, groping, caressing violently. It made the bard feel filthy and tainted. Tears sprang from her eyes and she shut them tight. She had seduced many men and women before leaving them spent in the morning, but this time it was different. This time she'd wanted only the warden to touch her like that and having had Marjolaine touch her made her cringe.

She didn't know if Keeland had seen any of it, if so at least she hadn't said anything, then again she hadn't said anything at all to the bard all day long. Thus Leliana couldn't help but wonder since the warden kept her distance. Perhaps Marjolaine had succeeded in ruining her happiness after all? Or perhaps it was her own fault for going along with it? Alistair had been the one to help her get up from the master manipulator's lifeless body while Keeland had helped Wynne treat the group's injuries. She knew it was Keeland's duty as a leader to take care of all of them, but she wished Keeland had come over to check on her, or ask her if she was ok, but the warden had stayed away.

She opened her eyes returning to reality. She could hear the antivan elf confer with Alistair probing him about losing his virginity. The templar however refused to answer who the lucky girl had been, much to Zevran's dismay. Wynne had retreated to her tent and Morrigan muttered as she prepared her potions. She could hear everyone save Keeland who'd gone back to her old taciturn self. Why wouldn't she talk to her? She sighed and closed her eyes, silently praying to the Maker that the warden would join her in her tent, and help her forget the morning's event.

---

---

"You know… you really should talk to her." The templar interrupted Keeland's thinking where she walked the perimeters making sure everything was as it should.

She'd avoided the bard since they left Marjolaine's corpse in the clearing letting the templar keep an eye on her. It wasn't so much that she'd seen the bard make out with her ex-lover, she just didn't know if Leliana wanted her company right now. It made more sense to her that the bard would like to be alone with her thoughts, besides Keeland didn't want the bard to feel pressured into explaining anything to her just because they had... well, canoodled around as the sassy witch would call it.

She looked up at the templar frowning. "I don't think it's such a good idea…"

He tilted his head. "No? Why not? Don't you have things to talk about?"

She sighed. "I'm just not sure it's the right time. It's been quite a rough day, maybe she wants to be alone."

Alistair chuckled. "Kee, it's Leliana we're talking about, the non-stop talking bard. When she's not talking it's because she needs to be talked to."

"Well aren't you just one happy fortune cookie then..?" Keeland muttered, but felt a warm tingle inside at his amiable nickname for her.

"For you maybe, but don't tell anyone 'cause then the ladies will be queuing up to find out how to find ser mac dreamy is." He said.

She laughed, brushing her hair from her face. "You are a funny man, you know that?" She had spent a lot of time disliking the man in front of her, then disliking his immature nature, and then his whining, and then his stinking boots, but she was beginning to see that he wasn't all that bad. In fact he was actually a very, _very _nice man. She placed her hand on his cheek, his beard stubble felt rough against her soft palm. "You are going to make someone a very happy person one day, you know that don't you?"

His eyes stared in to hers for a long time before they darted to the side and he smiled. It was his trademark smile, eyes squinted, one dimple on each cheek, bending his head low. "I only wished it would have been…"

Keeland chuckled. "No you don't silly. I'm far too abrasive, and have too much of a temper."

"Who said I was going to say you?" He jutted his lip in a pout feigning hurt.

"I'm an elf, remember? These ears hear everything…. even your _thoughts_." She tapped her ear demonstratively smiling.

"Well then, what am I thinking now?" The templar challenged her.

"Tss… easy, that I should go talk to Leliana."

Alistair inhaled sharply mocking her. "You _do _hear thoughts."

She shook her head and swatted him before stalking off to the bard's tent.

---

---

Leliana could hear the distinct sound of chainmail boots crashing down on soft grass before the flaps on her tent were pulled aside.

"Err…" Keeland said carefully peaking in through the opening.

She rolled over looking at her, blue eyes swollen and red.

"I was going to ask you if you were ok, but I see that… uh… you perhaps want to be alone." Green eyes searching blue, asking for permission to enter the tent.

Leliana smiled weakly at the warden who nodded slightly before crawling in to the tent.

Keeland placed herself next to the bedroll and Leliana crawled up to her burying her face in her neck clinging on to her shoulders for support.

"You know…" Keeland started before she felt the bard's lips against her own. The bard kissed her intensely aching for the warrior's strong touch. Keeland wasn't late with grabbing her hips, letting her tongue explore the bard's mouth as if they had ever done this before. Leliana rolled over straddling the warden kissing her passionately. Breaking free she sat back eyeing the warden as she pulled her top off baring herself for Keeland, every scar visible for the warden to study. She needed the Keeland to see her, to touch her, to rid her body of Marjolaine's touch.

"Make love to me." She whispered almost inaudibly before the warden sat up claiming the bard as her own with her nimble fingers, the bard proclaiming her love for the warden.

---

---

Morrigan scoffed at the muffled gasps and sighs from the bard's tent. "'tis impossible to concentrate with ginger moaning in my ear. It's like having an involuntary three way!" She stood up in frustration potions flying in all directions.

Zevran chuckled approvingly. "Oh I would like to see that."

"Wait, what?" Alistair exclaimed reminding Morrigan of a boy entering puberty.

The witch turned to him. "Well what do you think those noises are for? Drawing circles in the dirt?"

"I, no, but…" Alistair felt his heart sink. Keeland was with Leliana, had she chosen her, or was it the same thing as with him? He shook his head. He'd seen the look on Leliana's face last night. It was evident that she loved Keeland. But did Keeland love her? Or was she using her to be with Tamlen? Should he say something to the bard? Was it really his place? What if he didn't say anything and the bard found out later on he could have stopped it? He bit his lip wishing more than ever that a new dawn would arise.

---

---

"Thank you." The bard whispered to Keeland where she lay.

She smirked. "What for?"

"For helping me forget about today." Leliana said snuggling closer to the warden resting her head on Keeland's chest.

Keeland chuckled. "It was my pleasure. Trust me."

The bard giggled. "Yes I'm sure it was." She said before propping herself up on her elbow. "I'm sorry… about last night." She said staring at the ground shamefully.

Keeland smiled at the slight lisp and the heavy orlesian accent. "It's ok, but for someone who talks so much you're a terrible listener."

"I am _not_!" The orlesian defended herself. "I just… didn't…"

"Hear me?" Keeland helped the bard finish her sentence.

The bard pouted. "Maybe."

"I… probably could have told you anyway..."

Leliana shook her head. "You shouldn't have to. It's your past and I have no rights to it."

Keeland's eyes fluttered a little. "You do. You can't love someone and not let them close."

Leliana's face shone up at the warden's words and she laid down burying her smiling face in Keeland's neck. _She LOVES me!_

---

---

"Fenarel, quickly!" The scout hissed to the young warrior.

Fenarel stood by the edge of the forest staring into the vast darkness. "What is it Lethallin?"

"Something's not right. There is something in the forest." The scout said looking frightened.

Fenarel narrowed his eyes. Something in the forest? Could it be shems? Wolfs? He turned to follow the scout when a loud cracking-sound exploded behind him. They spun around as a dark shadow emerged from the forest.

Fenarel drew his bow aiming it at the shadow hissing to the scout. "Go back to camp immediately. Get backup!"

The scout scrambled back towards the camp shouting for reinforcements.

"Stop! Stay where you are!" Fenarel warned the dark shadow advancing on him. He called out once more then the world went black.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **As always a huge thanks to every single one of you who keep reviewing my work. It's a blast to keep writing.

So... I hope you keep enjoying my story, and for those of you who are waiting for a To The Edge of The World update.... i will update it whenever I take a break from this story. :)

Enjoy and if you do enjoy it, throw in a review. ;)

Till next time!

/Elmo

Ps. BioWare owns everything you recognize from the game, everything else.... mine!


	13. From Ashes

**FROM ASHES**

THE CAVERNS WERE DIMLIT and echoed eerily from the footsteps of the small group ascending through the tunnels. It had taken them two weeks to reach Frostback Mountain and so far they had been battling their way through the mountain's twisting pits. There had been darkspawns to last them a lifetime, but the group had worked efficiently, Keeland in the lead, back to back with Alistair, closely followed by the quanari and the assassin, the mage and the witch standing on a safe distance supported by the bard and her lethal arrows.

They had thought the worst bit was over when they had stumbled into Kolgar and his men, but much to the group's dread they would not let them pass without a fight. The battle had taken the gist out of them and they were all resolute as they progressed slowly. The whole town of Haven had been some sort of Andraste-loving crazy cult and just getting into the village gad been problematic.

_More crazy? I thought we were all full up. _Alistair's voice rung in Keeland's head. Apparently the bard wasn't _that _crazy. The warden chuckled a little glancing over at Leliana who was scanning the area ahead for any signs of enemies. The bard turned around at the sound of her chuckle giving her a questioning look a smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

"Oh, the two of you are quite sickening." The witch sniped from behind her back drawing a sweet giggle from the bard.

Keeland frowned. Was it that obvious? Neither she nor Leliana had told the rest of the group anything. They had – after all, not decided anything between themselves. Now when she came to think of it, what were they really? She bit her lower lip, were they lovers? Just friends with benefits perhaps? Just seeing where things were going? There was no reason to decide, right? But if someone asked about them what would she say? If she said nothing and Leliana overheard it, would she be upset? She thought about it for a moment longer before Morrigan smiled wryly at her.

"I'll never fully understand what it is you see in the Chantry girl, but from what I've heard she's not as chaste as one would think a sister should be."

"I don't know what you're..."

"Oh, don't play games with me Keeland. I'm not so..."

The whole cave shook violently with a loud rumble making it feel as if it would collapse at any minute. Morrigan nearly reeled backwards before the warden got a hold of her.

"Run!" Keeland yelled tugging Morrigan by her hand as the high arching ceiling began to come lose, large rocks crashing down towards them. The witch let her hand be held as she ran behind Keeland, letting the elf guide her through the falling debris. The rest of the group had been ahead of them and was stumbling out from the cave when she heard the ominous rumbling behind her. Feeling the start of a massive wind gust she grabbed the witch by her waist and leapt out from the opening landing hard on her back arms wrapped protectively around Morrigan who groaned displeased.

Opening her eyes she felt Morrigan lie on top of her, her slim body pressed against hers. Golden coloured eyes stared into hers slightly bewildered as to what had just happened. Straddling the warden she pushed herself up slowly her face lingering dangerously close to Keeland's.

"Just don't get any ideas in your head warden." The witch warned narrowing her eyes, her breath hot against Keeland's throat.

"Why, you afraid you might like them?" The warden chuckled flirtatiously before she caught the bard's foot tapping impatiently, hands on her hips, a scowl upon her face.

Morrigan's face shone wickedly when she saw the bard and placed her finger on Keeland's mouth leaning in ever so close. "Actually, I might just to set her off."

Keeland blushed furiously trying to slither underneath the witch. Morrigan was an exceptional beauty, no one could deny that, and truth be told, had it not been for Leliana then Keeland would have jumped at the chance, but Keeland knew the witch all too well and this was nothing but a way to wind the bard up.

The witch chuckled sultry before getting up, brushing herself off. Keeland stood up averting her eyes from the bard bashfully. Morrigan walked past Leliana winking evilly at her. The bard snorted and scowled challengingly.

"Err... Yes, so let's find this urn then..." Alistair said, trying to break the tension.

There was another rumbling and then the leaves rustled with an ominous coil as a giant mauve dragon came into view, its massive wings beating the air. They all crouched instinctively, Keeland drawing her swords. She smiled as she saw the dragon perch on a cliff high above their heads, and she felt the adrenaline surge through her body. The bard and the templar saw the dangerous sparkle in her eyes.

"No!" The bard hissed.

"We could just sneak past it." The templar filled in.

Keeland scoffed. "I hardly think so."

"'tis a _dragon_, you are aware this, no?" Morrigan scowled at the elf.

"Very much so, but I will not risk my whole party in a suicide sneak-by. I will lure it away from the cliff while the rest of you get yourself to the other side. Sten you're coming with me. Sten and I will keep it grounded, the rest of you do your things."

"Wait, what, no!" Leliana exclaimed.

"Yes, why him and not me?" Alistair asked, fed up with being left behind during all the great fights.

"Because let's face it, he's replaceable, you're not. We can afford to lose _one_ warden," she pointed at herself, "not two."

Sten huffed behind her back.

"I'll go then." Leliana said a determined look on her face.

"I need you for crowd control, keeping an eye on Morrigan and Wynne."

"But there is _no _crowd..." The bard frowned.

"Well, then I need your ranged attacks. Alistair will block the dragon should it feel the desire to attack you."

Leliana grabbed her fiercely by the top of her chestplate hissing through her teeth. "I will _never _talk to you again if you die, do you hear me?"

Keeland's eyes twinkled "O-oh no, you won't get rid of me that easily." Then she pushed to her feet, swords drawn, followed closely by the huge quanari warrior.

"Hey!" she shouted at the top of her lounges. "HEEY! Dog breath I'm talking to you!" she shouted waving her arms above her head.

The dragon swung its large head towards the sprinting elf. A high-pitched shrill echoed across the mountain top followed by the elf's gleeful laughter as the chase was on. The dragon dove off the cliff snapping its sharp-fanged jaws at her. Hearing the group rustling as they sprinted towards the other side, she turned around facing the dragon pulling a small vial from her leather pouch. She threw it at the looming dragon and it bounced off its right leg shattering against the stony mountain ground. Green acid sprayed the dragon, burning through its scaly hide.

"NOW!" she shouted and charged at the dragon closely followed by Sten.

The companions followed unit, Morrigan casting her thunderbolts, electric sparks shooting from her hands. Leliana's arrows dug themselves into the thick hide with jaw breaking force not doing great damage but slowing it down considerably.

Zevran and Alistair had joined the two warriors striking and hacking at the dragon. Sten lunged himself at the dragon's side plunging his sword into its thick belly. The dragon twisted angrily, breathing fire, swatting the fighters aside with the huge scaly tail. Leliana and Morrigan were sent sprawling. Only Wynne stood steady weaving her spells furiously, healing companions, freezing and slowing the beast down.

Keeland had dived for shelter when the dragon breathed fire at them, but was now sprinting towards it, coming to a slide underneath its wings chainmail grating on stone. Raising her swords she pierced the thick wing severing it as she slid to a stop underneath its belly.

Alistair and Sten followed. Alistair bashed his shield and thrust his sword at the dragon and Sten pummelled head first piercing the beast multiple times. Morrigan was back on her feet punishing the dragon with her spells, sending waves of horror at it. The companions worked relentlessly, but the beast would not yield, it did not even seem to tire. Keeland was starting to despair when Sten swung his greatsword and it lodged itself in the beast's front leg. Using both his hands he pushed against it, his whole weight helping him push against the sword.

The beast roared trying to shake the quanari off, but to no avail. The strong quanari clung on to the dragon which shook its whole body wildly, swinging and bashing its lethal tail at the struggling companions.

"Enough off this!" Keeland shouted irritably at the dragon, strapping her swords to her back. She raised her hands in front of her as the dragon's tail came surging towards her watching it intently. The tip of her tongue stuck out from the corner of her mouth as she concentrated.

The tail crushed into her and she grabbed it with both her hands clinging on to it for dear life. She dashed through the air behind the dragon's tail. When the beast realized something was stuck at its tail it flicked it forcefully and she felt herself tossed up high into the air as if she weighed no more than a leaf. A ticklish sensation tugged at her stomach and she shrieked in delight.

"Keeland!" The bard cried out exasperated.

Even the witch seemed taken aback yelling at the top of her longue. "Be careful!"

Keeland heard none of it, the sensational feeling from falling free from the sky blinding her to anything else. Spinning through the air she snapped back to reality unsheathing her swords. Raising both her hands above her head and struck at the dragon's wide head cutting it multiple times drawing red lines with her swords. The dragon jerked its head, snapping at her. It caught her by the ends of her flapping cloak slinging her upwards into the air again. Keeland couldn't help but to close her eyes shut and giggle before she twisted her body in the air aiming her weapons at the beast's head.

She landed on its thick neck and plunged her blades into its head, crushing through scales and bones. The beast roared one last time before it went crashing towards the ground pulling the elf along with its fall. She clung on to its head as it fell and was sent sprawling when the beast's head smashed into the ground. She landed hard on her back a few feet away from the large corpse. She groaned and the world swayed a little.

The bard skidded to her knees next to the warden cupping her face. "Keeland?" She asked her voice trembling with worry. The rest of the group stood hovering above her looking down at Keeland.

Keeland kept her eyes closed for a while longer enjoying the rush of the battle before she threw them open, a wide grin on her face.

"I want to do it again!" She laughed through her panting, high on adrenaline.

The bard's face turned into a scowl. "How dare you?" she said vehemently releasing the giggling warden. "You frightened me half to death!" She continued angrily though her facial expression softened.

Keeland found herself unable to stop laughing, the adrenalin still rushing through her body filling her with glee and a tickling feeling of joy and empowerment. Rising to her feet, still laughing she looked over at the gigantic dragon and shook her head in amazement.

"You did good." She said grinning. "Really good, now let's go get ourselves some ash."

0o0o0

0o0o0

Keeland felt the bard shift behind her and the templar squirmed a little as an awkward silence settled amongst the group. She stared into Tamlen's eyes as he spoke to her. At first she thought she was imagining things, but by the looks upon her companions' faces she understood that she was not. She had taken a step towards him, her hands held out, but he had backed away.

"Please." She whispered. _You left him in the ruins, left him to his fate_. The guardian's words still rang in her head. "I'm sorry… I could have tried looking for you… I could have tried…" Her whisper died out when the dirt-blonde elf took a step forward lifting her chin with his hand.

"Some things lost can never be found, some mistakes never unmade. Those that survive must go on living, and you have suffered enough from guilt." She stared into his eyes. "It is time to leave that behind." He finished before placing his cold hand in hers. Then before she knew it he was gone again leaving her painfully aware of the fact that the whole group had just witnessed her in such a weak moment.

She turned around slowly looking at the bard who seemed to be looking anywhere but at her. Tucking the amulet Tamlen had given her inside her armour she ordered them to keep going, taking the lead along with Pork Chop, her silent comrade in arms.

0o0o0

0o0o0

They stood staring at the elf.

"I can't believe it." Merill said. "Will he be alright?"

The keeper shook her head. "I'm not sure da'len. I've done what I can with my magic, it's up to him now. We should let him rest if his body is to cope with his injuries." She said turning to leave the warm caravan. Merill followed, her head bent.

Outside the caravan the clan stood in groups whispering, all wondering about the elf and what exactly had happened last night.

"How do we explain this?" Merill asked looking concerned.

"There is nothing to explain. Not yet." The keeper said glancing out across the camp. What had happened last night? She glanced over at the caravan knowing the only ones who knew were fighting for their lives inside the caravan. For now all they could do was wait…

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **Hey all! Thanks for all the replies and encouragement! I'm sorry it's taken me a while to update, but it's been Easter and I've been working and beta-reading some and working on my book. But here it is, the new chapter. I hope you enjoy it, next one will be up tomorrow since it's already written, but I have to keep you hanging a while, no? ;)

Don't be scared to review what you like and don't like. In that way I can improve my writing.

Thanks and enjoy!

Till next time!

/Elmjuniper


	14. A Pinch Of Ashes, A Pinch Of Spice

**A PINCH OF ASHES, A PINCH OF SPICE**

THE ALTAR WAS SMALL AND SQUARE, but to Keeland it seemed an altar had never been more intimidating. _Right, so... yes... _she thought to herself before turning to face the group.

Leliana knit her brows. "There's no switch to control the fire..." She said as she roamed the area together with Zevran trying to find it.

Morrigan shook her head. "'Tis no spell either."

Keeland sighed. "Nope." She crossed her arms. "Here's what I have to do..." She gestured towards the altar. "_I_... shall have to cleanse myself." She said dryly. She was getting extremely fed up with the ridiculous things she was being put through these days.

"_Cleanse _yourself?" Alistair sounded suspicious.

"Yes. I have to _undress _and walk butt naked _through _the blazing hot flames. That is _exactly _what _I _have to do." She declared sounding a lot like the swooping witch of the wilds.

"Oh..." The templar blushed, being the chivalrous type he was thinking of where in the room he could possibly look away from Keeland.

"O-oh ho!" The antivan narrowed his eyes in an approving grin.

Sten merely grunted, or perhaps taking a deep breath, Keeland never could tell. Wynne just looked on motherly offering to hold the elf's clothes.

"'Tis going to be so much more fun than I could have ever imagined." Morrigan gloated.

"Well, you all enjoy it because _this _naked," she drew an invisible circle in the air in front of her body with her index finger, "you'll never see again." Keeland muttered, placing her weapons on the altar.

"We'll see about that, won't we?" The witch winked smiling wildly as the bard shot her a dirty look. "Leliana, wasn't it the maker who said we should _share _our blessings?" Morrigan chided her.

Leliana opened her mouth and closed it a few time unable to think of a good comeback. "Nothing to say, no?" The witch scoffed. "And you're supposed to be a _bard_."

"Morrigan, not even _you _can be so bored that you have to bicker with Leliana while I'm disrobing. If you're really _that _keen on sleeping with me - why not just eye fuck me while you have the chance? Or shall I just send you an invitation to one of our bootlicking session?" Keeland snapped as she stripped the last of armour off her body standing fully exposed in front of the whole group.

"I _never _get invited to things like that..." Alistair whined.

The bard and the witch gawked at her in shock. By the looks of it Wynne found it amusing as her eye wrinkled in one of her motherly chuckles. Zevran on the other hand was already having dirty images in his head judging by the dreamy look on his face and Pork Chop barked happily.

Keeland scowled at the dog wondering what in the hells names he was so happy about before sniping. "Now, if you excuse me, my elvish complexion and I have to go get ourselves a tan."

The elvin warden gulped as she took a step closer to the high rising flames. The heat radiated from them making her sweat, tiny pearls glistening on her pale skin. She stared at the flames. What would happen if she wasn't worthy? Would that mean she would... burn?

_Ok Andraste I know we've never spoken before, I'm... very sorry about that, but I find myself in need of your help. I need to... uhm... take some of your ashes. I need them to help me defend Ferelden against the blight._ She prayed to herself before taking a deep breath, exhaling slowly, and then she stepped into the flames.

The pain washed over her instantly, racking her body. It felt like sand grating her skin raw and as if she was being torn apart from the inside. She cried out clasping her head as she fell to her knees. Images flashed before her mind. A dark-haired female elf with the bluest eyes smiled at her ruffling her hair, then more images followed, of Merrill, the keeper, of her first Halla and the wooden toys she had as a little girl. Then the images from the cave shot at her and the pain increased. When Tamlen was sucked into the mirror it felt as if she was going to be ripped apart and she screamed out loud. Pictures of Duncan and her joining at Ostagar flickered by, then the bard came into view, and the other companions and the pain eased off. Then all the images swirling before her eyes faded to black and she found herself on the cold stone floor panting heavily, her body racking with pain. She lay curled up like a ball her cheek pressed hard against the floor. On the other side of the flames stood the companions looking frightened. The templar and the mage were restraining the bard by her arms, keeping her from rushing up to the naked warden. Keeland lay down until her breathing slowed and she crawled onto her knees, standing up on her wobbling legs.

The guardian came into view. "You passed the Gauntlet and the cleansing." He stated. He said something else she could not hear, and then the flames evaporated behind her just in time for the weakened elf to crash into the bard's arms.

Leliana caught the warden in her arms lowering her to the ground gently. Alistair brought her amour and Morrigan and Wynne worked to dress her, Leliana soothing her with a tale about kings and queens. Then they all waited.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Keeland woke after nearly two hours.

"What the..." She mumbled where she lay, her head in Leliana's lap, the other companions sitting cross-legged in a half circle opposite them.

"Hey there..." the bard said in her soft voice, blue eyes sparkling at her.

Keeland smiled tiredly at the bard sighing deeply. Could they not just stay like this and let others deal with the blight?

"How are you feeling?" Wynne asked, her cold hand examining her face.

"Ugh... that really hurt. It was even worse than the joining, similar, but _a lot _worse." She said, describing the excruciating pain.

"I suppose 'cleansing' was quite the appropriate word." Alistair mumbled. "I can't even imagine what that would be like if it's even worse than the joining."

Keeland got up slowly. "I just want to get out of here now. I'm growing tired of all these stupid favors we have to do for people." She grumbled.

The room they were in was absolutely grand and at the very end a huge stairway led up to the small altar holding the urn. The group followed her slowly up the stairs the bard, templar and mage equally awestruck. Keeland felt nothing but an extreme weariness wash over her and a strange urge to cry, but she expected it was the aftermath of the cleansing rather than seeing the urn. She stood staring at the urn for a while before she gently lifted the top open and took a pinch of ashes putting it in one of the small vials Wynne had given her. Turning to her companions she smiled, shaking the vial.

"Next stop Redcliffe."

0o0o0

0o0o0

The last thing Keeland remembered was trudging down the mountain before setting camp by a lake side. She'd crawled into her tent denying herself both food and water falling fast asleep.

She woke up from the frogs' and crickets' constant croaking. Feeling a bit groggy she sat up and rubbed her eyes, yawing. The camp was asleep save two of the companions keeping watch.

"What a day…" She mumbled rolling off her bedroll into a sitting position. She was still wearing her filthy armour and frowned displeased.

"I need a bath."

0o0o0

0o0o0

The witch held no love for humans. She thought of them as weak creatures that always let their emotions guide them, placing their fate in the hands of some absentee father-figure no one could even prove had ever existed. She especially did not like the virtuous Chantry girl who insisted on pestering her with questions of her mother, trying to impose her beliefs on the witch.

Keeland – their leader was much different from the others, besides being an elf. She was not afraid to admit to bad logic or sometimes being guided by her emotions. Though the elf was always well aware of when she did so, unlike the rest of the group. Morrigan did like their leader – much to her dismay. She liked how the warden would snipe back at her, or banter with her when she needed to do so for her own sanity's sake. Keeland had the same efficient way of thinking and based the majority of her decisions on the most logical and sensible alternative.

Morrigan had – like the rest of the group, desires and needs that needed to be tended to, save the mage perhaps, she was too old according to the witch. Watching the warden head for the lake, towel tucked in underneath her arm, Morrigan smiled, licking her lips.

0o0o0

0o0o0

The water was cool and caressed her aching muscles. Splashing about it reminded her of other days and she smiled. Sleep had done her well and she felt a strange sort of serenity within her that she had not felt for a very long time. She laughed a little to herself diving underneath the water, breaking the surface moments later. Floating near the strand on her back she drew in the night's smells mixed with the scent from the soap.

"I thought I was the only one who enjoyed nightswimming." The witch's voice jolted her out of her thoughts.

Swallowing fists of water in surprise she watched the stripped witch stride into the lake towards her. The elf wiped the water from her face. Morrigan was less than an arm's length away. Her cat-like eyes studied the warden, her sultry, plum lips smiling seductively. Putting her arms around the warrior she extinguished what little space there was left between them pressing her naked, lascivious body firmly against Keeland's.

"What are you doing?" The elf asked in a state of bewilderment.

"'tis not obvious?" Morrigan winked nibbling the elf's earlobe.

It sent pleasurable shivers down the elf's spine. "Morrigan, I'm… I… Leliana…"

"Yes, I know, you love the Chantry girl, but 'tis not love that I'm after." Morrigan purred and pressed her hot centre against Keeland. "'Tis just passion Keeland, nothing but two people getting release, she needn't ever know." Morrigan said her lips sucking skill fully at her neck.

Keeland couldn't think straight with the witch clinging on to her begging for release. Did she love the bard? She had nearly said it, well said it sort of, but did she really? What did it matter anyway? Did the bard _really _love her? _Of course she does, and yes you do! _She screamed at herself in her head, but it was Morrigan and Leliana. It was like choosing between sweets and more sweets. It was impossible! Even more so when the witch grabbed Keeland's hands guiding them across her slick body as she licked and nibbled the warden's bottom lip drawing a husky moan from the warden.

"I can't think properly!"

"There's no need to think, just feel." Morrigan purred and with that she launched another assault on the warden's lips. "I need your hands tonight Keeland." She moaned into the elf's mouth.

"Is it not a tempting proposal?" Morrigan said in mock innocence.

"It is…" Keeland mumbled extremely aroused, and even more so indecisive…

TO BE CONTINUED…

* * *

**A/N: **OOOOOOH! Naughty, naughty Keeland…. I know for some this whole Morrigan/FemPC thing is weird, but after being _extremely _disappointed when realizing I could not romance her as a FemPC I found the lovely mod Equal Love on Nexus and voilá! Morrigan was a romance option for FemPC:s as well. ^^

On another note… the previous chapter is based on my bungy jump and the fact that I felt _really _envious of my PC when she got flung up in the air by the dragon so I just _had _to describe what Keeland would be feeling like at that moment surging through the air.

Again thanks to everyone who keeps reviewing and giving me such wonderful support and encouragement! :D it's makes me a happy, happy Asian. ;)

As always a big thanks to my beta-reader Nerdtron who helped me beta this after posting it. ^^ i sometimes get impatient and want to post it and then just change the errors afterwards.

I hope you'll keep reading, and reviewing. ^^

Enjoy and till next time!

/Elmjuniper


	15. Don't Go Down To The Water's Edge

**DON'T GO DOWN TO THE WATER'S EDGE**

THE TEMPLAR WAS STROLLING ALONG the perimeters as he was lost deep in thoughts. During their journey throughout Ferelden so many things seemed to have happened. Things he couldn't control. Darkspawns, monsters and dragons, had once been no more than a distant rumour, but now it had become his duty as a grey warden to serve the land as a defender against all of those. It was sometimes hard to fathom, how he had gone from an unhappy templar in training to being a grey warden. Lately he found that the expectations people had when meeting them were starting to weigh down on him. He could only imagine what the elf must feel like, constantly under pressure, having to compromise most of the time and agreeing to all kind of different time consuming, strenuous tasks so that they could collect an army to stand against the blight. He had noticed a change with the elf though, she seemed more... at ease, and calmer. She slept at night. She even teased him every now and then when she was having a good day. She still had a temper like a harpy though and would snap at him every once in a while. Then there was the fact that she had been spending an increasing amount of time with the bard. He didn't understand why it surprised him, not after overhearing them in the bard's tent. He guessed he had just figured maybe she just wanted to... well, get her release that night, nothing more.

He sighed shaking his head, he couldn't help it, but with each day that passed the elf made an even stronger impression on him and whatever he might have felt when they spent the night, he felt tenfold and he savoured the few moments he had to himself with the elf. Even if she did snap at him, or make decisions he didn't always agree with, even if she was... spending a lot of her time with Leliana.

His thoughts averted to the bard. He knew she loved their leader and would lay down her life for her, just by watching her anyone could tell, especially the witch, which had turned the bard into Morrigan's next favourite to goad. He felt a little sorry for the bard, but she could defend herself better and with much more flare than what he could pull off. He still hadn't figured out what Keeland was doing with the bard, and after today he was even more uncertain. He'd seen the chemistry which had sparkled like electric fire between the elf and the witch. Leliana must have seen it to but chosen to ignore it. Though unlike him she did not have knowledge of what Keeland was capable of doing when it came to intimate relations. Or maybe she did? She had been a bard after all. Perhaps it was something she would be ok with? Besides they hadn't said anything to the group, maybe they weren't considering themselves more than... friends? He shook his head again. Whatever it was going on between them it wasn't his business, still he would not want for either one of them to get hurt. And when admitting it to himself... he was still hoping that maybe Keeland would wake up one day and look at him in a different way. Perhaps he could impress her with his potential claim to the throne he thought amusedly to himself.

He still hadn't told her about who his real father was. There hadn't been any time for it. At least that's what he kept telling himself. He knew he would eventually have to tell her... he wasn't looking forward to going back to Redcliffe having that hanging over him.

The distinct sound of low voices caught his attention. Lifting his head, he strained his ears. Someone was definitely out there by the lake. Alistair started walking towards the lake his heavy templar amour rustling loudly in the silent night. He clenched his teeth and stopped. Perhaps he should go wake the bard, he was after all not known for his skill in using stealth. _I could be deaf and still hear you trying to sneak about_. Keeland's voice rang in his head.

He huffed a little turning back to the camp walking hurriedly to wake up the bard.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Morrigan nibbled the warden's soft lip before breaking free to look at her. It was dark, and the water pressing against them added to the sensations running through the warden's body. This was not right! She couldn't do this. Why would she need t... the witch's moist lips sucked on her bottom lip, teasing her, enticing her. She growled in frustration at the warmth stirring within her grabbing Morrigan by the bun at the back of her head, pulling it. The witch gasped with pleasure at the slight pain, chuckling seductively before Keeland's hungry lips claimed hers. Her tongue danced a violent dance with Keeland's. The warden's hand grabbed her one thigh lifting it up so she could curl it around her waist. Morrigan let her other leg curl around the warden's waist, locking her legs together behind the warden's muscular back. Keeland let her lips roam against the witch's throat, hearing her lecherous moans as she did so she let go of her thigh pushing at the heat with her free hand. Morrigan hissed clenching her teeth as the warden moved along with her. The warden worked her relentlessly, the witch biting into the elf's shoulders as she sighed and groaned. Keeland buried her face at the witch's neck, feeling the hands which normally weaved spells working other wonders with her in the cool water of the lake. The witch's eyes rolled back into her head as she goaded the warden's hand which slowed its motion in a teasing manner.

"Don't stop now warden." She whispered huskily as Keeland released a throaty chuckle.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"You are up?" Alistair said to the small bard's frame sitting by the fire.

She nodded turning towards him, eyes weary and sad.

"What's wrong, are you alright?" He asked a little worried.

"Keeland's not in her tent." She answered picking at her leather boot.

"No? Maybe she's just talking one of her infamous night strolls in the woods?" Alistair suggested.

"A stroll in the night with the witch?" She asked with a snort.

"Oh..." Said the templar when the bard raised the touchy subject. "I'm sure they're just talking. You know they have been quite close ever since they first met. Trust me. I had to live with them on my own for a while." He said trying to cheer up the bard.

"You think so? I'm being so silly about this. I should not let Morrigan get to me." Leliana said looking at him for reassurance. "Keeland wouldn't... not when she's with... seeing... spending time with someone?"

Alistair gulped. Was this when he chose not to tell her or was it now he was supposed to tell her. Didn't the bard deserve the truth? Did she not deserve to decide for herself whether Keeland had broken their deal or not? He shook his head, he couldn't tell her. It was not up to him.

The bard turned her head towards his with a stern look. "You know something." She said matter-of-factly.

"No... I... don't." He said in an attempt to avoid the subject.

"Don't lie to me Alistair, don't you dare! Tell me! Please Alistair _don't lie _to me." Leliana pleaded with him.

He sighed. "Look Leliana, I'm sure you don't have to worry, Keeland is probably not even with the witch. You know she's a loner."

"You're not being honest with me." She said the corners of her mouth quivering.

"I... I'm sure it doesn't mean anything, but... well, you know about Tamlen. Keeland and I... We... err..." How was he supposed to say this to the person Keeland was licking lampposts with now?

"Intimate with each other, I know." The bard filled in.

"Oh, ok... well the reason I nearly left afterwards was because she told me she wasn't actually being with me that night."

The bard looked confused. "What do you mean?"

"Well... she was with... Tamlen." He said quietly.

The bard looked pale all of a sudden. "But... that can't be! Would she use me to be with... but she said she..."

"It probably was just with me, I mean it didn't take her long to sleep with yo..." The words came out before he had time to stop them and much to his dismay they sounded really bitter.

The bard looked as if she'd seen a ghost before she regained her composure. "Well, if that is the case she will have to say it to me."

"I'm sorry Leliana I didn't mean to say that."

Leliana shook her head. "It's not your fault."

"I know, but... you want to take your mind off it?" He said remembering the noises he'd heard near the lake.

The bard smiled a little. "What do you have in mind?"

"There is something near the lake, I think it might be a merchant or maybe one of Loghain's hired assassins out to kill us, but you know me and my stealth ability." He winked at her.

"That will definitely take my mind off things. Come then show me where it is." The bard said standing up.

"Follow me my dear lady." The templar said before taking the lead.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Morrigan drew her breath through clenched teeth twisting her fingers into the warden's thick hair. The warden's motions were still excruciatingly slow and she bucked her hips at Keeland urging for her to move faster.

"Come on..!" She groaned impatiently.

The warden eventually abided with her wishes sending sparks of pleasure surging through her body. This was passion, as raw as it could get. No feelings, no thoughts, just pure passion being touched like this, feeling the touch of hands and lips, skin and fingers. Morrigan felt her hair uncoil from the bun she always wore, her long dark hair cascaded down across her shoulders. Then the warden's teeth sunk into her throat adding to the sensation. She growled out loud in pleasure digging her nails into Keeland's back scratching it with just the right amount of pressure. The warden shut her eyes muttering elvish profanities into the witch's chest and somewhere along the line she thought she heard the elf whisper the bard's name. Morrigan laughed a sultry laughter then, in-between her ragged breath. The two of them so consumed by each other, neither of them heard the footsteps closing in on them.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Leliana felt a jab at her heart. Watching the ground she saw the familiar footprints from the elf followed by a second set. It could be just a coincident, yes? Yes, of course it was. Keeland had simply managed to walk the same path as someone else had walked earlier. Her confidence didn't last for long. She had seen the way Keeland had looked at the witch lying on top of her earlier that day and she'd felt jealous and hurt. It was an unusual feeling and she'd only felt it once before, when Keeland had met that elf in the tavern, but then it had been even more unjustified than now.

She had thought that Keeland was... serious with her, but maybe she was just not the one person kind of girl. What would she do if that was the case? What would she do if it turned out Keeland was... was wading through the witch's swamp? How was she supposed to react? She shrugged. She thought Keeland had said she loved her that night in the tent, but maybe... maybe she had just misinterpreted it. She thought about the templar's word back at the camp. It couldn't be that way. Keeland wasn't sleeping with her just to be with Tamlen. She wouldn't do that to her, use her like Marjolaine had done. Shaking her head she stopped by the stump of an old tree.

"It was here I heard it." Alistair said.

The bard listened intently relief washing over her as she realized the muffled sounds came from the lake and the footsteps they were following didn't lead straight to the lake. _I knew she wouldn't... _She thought to herself smiling.

"You are right. There is someone at the lake." She said as she steered towards it closely followed by the templar.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **Bad Keeland, bad! Why oh why? And what will happen next? Will the bard catch Keeland with her butt hanging out of her pants? And what happens if she does?

We'll just have to wait and see, won't we? ;)

Quite a few people mailed and asked about the Mod Equal Love. You can find it at Nexus: Just do a search for Equal Love.

Sorry FF won't let me post the address. :P

_Please note that it's a PC mod and will only work with the PC version of the game also if yo're already running with Dialogue Tweaks it won't work._

And you have to be a member on NEXUS to download it, and if you do download it and like it don't forget to leave an endorsement to Azuraft who created it! :)

Oh and this chapter's title is SO inspired by Seven Mary Three's Water Edge. Love that group. ^^

Thank you all for reading and reviewing. Don't hesitate to throw in a review if you like it, it shall make my day. :D

Enjoy and till next time!

/Elmjuniper


	16. Roots Of Destruction

**ROOTS OF DESTRUCTION**

THE DAY HAD STARTED LIKE any other days, except from the fact that Tamlen had gotten himself into trouble again. Keeland sighed where she stood next to Master Varathorn and glanced over at Tamlen who was busy being lectured by the Keeper. He stood with his arms folded frowning in defiance shaking his head. She smiled in spite of herself. She and Tamlen had gotten into a huge brawl with Finvarra and Parlan.

Finvarra and her brother had always been an annoying duo. Yesterday though had been even worse than normal. While finishing their chores Finvarra had made a snide comment about Keeland's habit of venturing off the perimeter. Keeland knew Finvarra wasn't talking about the camp's actual perimeter, but had chosen to ignore it. Tamlen on the other hand had retorted that Finvarra should focus on her hunting instead of things that did not concern her. Finvarra had laughed declaring the only reason Keeland would ever become the new Keeper would be out of Marethari's pity.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Keeland had asked sensing something strange in the other's voice.

"Finvarra..." Parlan hissed through his teeth.

Finvarra had kept quiet glaring at Keeland before turning her back away to walk off. Keeland had grabbed her by the shoulder.

"What is that supposed to mean?" She stared intently at the girl reading her reactions best she could.

"It _means _the only reason you becoming the next Keeper is because your mother was weak-hearted."

Keeland had shoved her with brute force. "Watch your mouth." She snarled.

Tamlen was right behind her. "You better watch your words carefully Finvarra." He warned.

"Let's _go _Fin." Parlan urged his sister.

Finvarra scoffed. "I'm so sick of this tip toeing around poor little Keeland. Gods forbid she ever found out the truth about the stupidity of her parents."

At the time Keeland had aimed to headbutt Finvarra, but merely had time to grab her before Parlan cut between them. Tamlen – being the proud elf male he was, grabbed Parlan by his neck tossing him aside and the brawl was on. They didn't stop until they heard angry shouts and Marethari's stern voice. They had all scrambled to their feet bustling into the forest. Keeland and Parlan managed to sneak away fairly easy, but Tamlen and Finvarra was left panting when the elders came running.

Tamlen refused to give up Keeland's name and Finvarra wouldn't tell on her brother. Marethari had eyed them suspiciously knowing full well they both weren't telling her the truth. She had given them a fair warning of what serious consequences fighting within the clan could have before stating that they would not work on their apprenticeship the following day, but each of them would be given chores instead.

Keeland saw Tamlen be dismissed by the Keeper. He glanced up at her quickly, smiling a little before strapping his bow to his back stalking off into the woods.

"What is Tamlen's chore today Master Varathorn?" She asked as casually as she could.

"He is to bring home dinner." Master Varathorn winked as he ran his hand across the smooth surface of the ironbark bow. Handing it over to Keeland he looked stern. "Now before you ask if you may leave I want you to find four things that your eyes have missed while creating this bow."

Keeland frowned. She thought she had done a good job with the bow. It had taken her three days to finish it. She studied it carefully twisting it in her hands. "The weight... is uneven and it's too heavy at the top." She answered slowly.

Varathorn nodded. "And why have I alerted you to this?"

"Because the efficiency will be greatly decreased slowing the arrow's speed remarkably."

She examined it further. "I used the wrong string?"

Varathorn nodded. "Instead of twined Halla fur you should have used woven strings from the ironbark. Halla string is for finer, lighter bows than this one. It's a small detail, but you wouldn't want to find yourself in the middle of a battle with a bow which string snaps."

She nodded. "I... err... can't think of anything else..."

Varathorn smiled. "It is – I suppose, something which you'll only be able to see when you have become a master craftsman, but you've carved it from two different angels."

"I have..? But why does that matter?"

"Nothing more than the visual. This is crafting Keeland. It's not only for the purpose of aiding us in hunting or fighting. It is an art, found nowhere else and it must be perfected. It must not only be efficient, but also beautiful. It is _your _creation, something to be proud of."

Keeland sighed. Master Varathorn was known to be a bit... peculiar, when it came to his crafting. "I see... I will remember that for my next work." She said, silently wishing he would let her go.

"Well, you answered my questions well da'len. Off you go, just don't tell the Keeper I let you off early." He winked.

Keeland squealed gleefully and nodded before scurrying off.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"By the Gods Kee!" Tamlen exclaimed when she snuck up on him.

Smiling she wrapped her arms around his neck drawing him close. "You should pay more attention, who knows what other terrible things might creep up on you otherwise."

He scowled at her feigning irritation. "I only let sneak up on me to make you feel good about yourself." He muttered before she giggled and kissed him pulling him towards the ground with her.

"I should be punished more often if this is how you are going to treat me." He teased in-between kisses.

She ran her fingers through his soft hair. "What did Finvarra mean with that comment yesterday?" She wondered aloud.

He shifted slightly above her. "Let's forget about that." He muttered.

She let her head fall back and stared at him. "Do you know something?"

His eyes darted insecurely. "No..."

She pushed him off. "You do. You're lying to me!"

"Kee, I'm not, honestly I know as much as you do." He sighed.

She narrowed her eyes. "Then what is it? Why are you acting all strange?"

"I'm not!" He exclaimed in frustration.

"You _are_." She said before gasping. "Are you sleeping with Finvarra?!" She asked.

"What? No!" He spluttered in disbelief.

"Not that I would care if you did anyway." She dismissed him coldly. He was hiding something from her she knew it and it angered her that he wouldn't tell her what.

He stood up abruptly. "You know Kee, I might not object to what you do, but I'm not into that. You should know me better." He said before turning his back walking away.

She sighed where she lay on the soft, mossy ground. Why did she do this? Push him away. She knew he wouldn't look at another woman – or man for that matter. She twisted the thin stalk of a Moss Flower between her fingers. Maybe he was telling her the truth, maybe he didn't know anything. She growled at herself. She was a master at taking out her frustration at Tamlen and he was usually too nice to object. It was hard, sometimes she felt she couldn't be without him, yet she strayed and pushed him away. _Because it's easier making him leave rather than having him leave you because you're not good enough._ She chided herself. This was stupid! Why couldn't she just say she loved him and act accordingly? Was she really so scared of losing him? She shook her head in disgust. She would have to stop this. _No more!_ She told herself as she got up to her feet hurrying after Tamlen.

Turning the corner she found him aiming his arrow at a group of shems. She drew her own bow walking up next to him.

"You're just in time Lethallin." He said in his fashionably cool voice. She tried not to smile.

The shems had taken off the second she persuaded him to let them go. They were entering the eerie cave when she opened her mouth to speak to him.

"Come on." He said patiently. "We can talk later."

She nodded and followed him closely, painfully unaware that it would be the last time she ever saw him again. Tamlen hadn't known anything about the truth of how her parents died. He'd heard the rumours, but he hadn't known about how her mother had walked off into the night - her heart wracked with grief. It was a poor excuse Keeland thought to herself, hurt and confusion tearing at her own heart. Her mother had abandoned her, and now the only person she had ever felt close to, who loved her unconditionally had left her too. As she had glanced back one last time at her clan where she walked behind Duncan, the image had imprinted a bitter message into her heart.

_Love weakens you and leaves you broken._

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**DISCLAIMER: **I haven't said it for a few chapters, but I suspect you all know who owns Dragon Age: Origins and all its characters, names and places etc. Anything else, roots, names, etc belongs to little ole' me.

**A/N: **Sorry I haven't updated for a while, had some things going on at work I had to deal with. This was a bit of an interlude and a necessity for the upcoming chapter.

Enjoy and I won't take too long with the next update. Oh and also, I'm finding myself without a BETA-reader once again so if anyone feels compelled to do some beta-ing please e-mail me! :)


	17. Dream On

**DREAM ON**

KEELAND SQUEEZED HER EYES SHUT. The witch was pulling at her every feeling enhancing it with her magic. She growled into the witch whose breathing had become irregular. Morrigan thrust herself against Keeland's skilful hand one last time then she sucked in her breath and held it until her whole body convulsed in fierce tremors.

Keeland felt the witch contract around her, whimpering as she collapsed in her arms. For a short moment Morrigan's thick impenetrable walls seemed to have crumbled to her feet leaving her unshielded in the warden's arms.

"Don't let me go." She whispered so quietly that Keeland would not have heard it had she not been an elf.

Keeland stayed where she was, Morrigan holding on to her as if she was the last safe harbour in all of Thedas.

0o0o0

0o0o0

The bard fled through the dark forest, twigs whipping at her face and arms. She fell and stood up again continuing her despaired dash through the dark forest. Angry tears fell down her face stinging the scratches on her rosy cheeks.

"Stay here or there would have been no point in me coming with you_." _She had told Alistair when they were drawing closer to the lake. The templar had obliged and she had carefully snuck towards the lake becoming one with the dark. Straining her ears she had heard a distant sound, much familiar to her ears.

Brushing away the thick shrubbery and branches blocking her view she had seen the familiar shapes of Keeland and the vile witch. Keeland's head buried at Morrigan's chest. The witch's face mirrored indescribable pleasures, her lips parted in lustful and raunchy moans. Leliana had seen the warden's arm move in an all too familiar motion along with the witch until she seemed to tense and relax in the warden's arms.

The bard's face twitched before she let go of the branches she'd been holding on to. She couldn't say how long she'd been standing there witnessing the act before her. She just knew it had been too long. Releasing the branches she headed back to where she had left the templar standing. Biting her lip she had tried to keep as calm as possible, but the minute she had seen the templar's inquiring eyes realization had struck her and she'd pushed past him fleeing as quickly as she could leaving the baffled templar standing.

Alistair had been right! Morrigan's face, overtaken by pleasure danced in front of her eyes, taunting her. She came to a stop and dropped to the ground, hiding her face in her hands. This was too much. She had opened herself up to Keeland who had tossed her aside in return. How dared she treat her like this? She was not some dockside whore the warden could just discard so easily!

She should have known. She knew Morrigan was beautiful with her pale skin and dark, intense hair and those golden-coloured eyes. Who wouldn't find her attractive? And Keeland had never made any promises to the bard, she knew that and she had been a fool to believe anything else. But what had all those nights they spent together meant? What had they been? What about the small moments when Keeland would wrap her arms around the bard placing soft kisses along the length of her spine, where they just... to fill the void of someone else? Had she just been a convenient replacement for Tamlen? Then perhaps this was for the better? Leliana knew things always ended, but she'd hoped it would last for longer than this. Being near Keeland had made her feel loved and safe. She'd felt like she was invincible next to the elf, like she could do anything and the way Keeland looked at her made her want to blush and giggle at the same time. _Love_. What a bitter taste. She shook her head, well wasn't it just her luck to fall for someone like Keeland.

"Stupid!" She growled to herself.

The bard frowned. Why had Keeland been with Morrigan? Was the bard not good enough? She swallowed, her throat feeling thick, was that it? Was she not exciting enough? Was she too sweet or too honest? Wasn't she mysterious enough? As a bard she knew the game rules very well, you had to act a certain way, plan your moves, and sometimes manipulate your opponent to want more of you, but she hadn't thought she would have to use those rules when it came to Keeland. Then again... what made her think that? Keeland was a Grey Warden, a fierce warrior who sought the adrenalin rush of battle, what made her think that Keeland wouldn't want the same excitement in her love life?

0o0o0

0o0o0

The walls were up again though the witch's voice was still thick and shaky.

"'Twasn't so bad now was it?" She asked, releasing her grip of the warden.

It hadn't been bad at all, in fact it had been a little too good, but it had felt wrong. It puzzled Keeland where she stood. Usually she felt a sense of satisfaction and calm, but this time she felt guilty. Morrigan had been exquisite and very pleasurable, no doubt, but she found her mind wandering off towards the bard. She hadn't promised the bard anything, so what were these feelings of guilt she had? It was a strange feeling and even though she tried to push it to the back of her mind its presence lingered pecking at her conscious.

The witch caressed her cheek with a gentle stroke. "Enough of this, we best be back at camp before the others wake up." She said and eased away from the elf.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"Had a nice swim?" The bard asked where she sat by the campfire, arms folded across her chest, lips pursed in a disapproving expression.

The witch and the elf stopped dead in their tracks. Morrigan turned towards the bard before glancing at the elf. "'Twas very stimulating and pleasurable indeed." Her eyes gleamed.

"Don't play games with me Morrigan. I _know _about the two of you." The bard said, anger rising in her voice.

"Do you _really_?" The witch taunted the red haired bard, earning herself a scowl from the warden.

"I _saw _you... by... in the lake knocking boots." She said in her orlesian accent. The corner of her mouth quivered a little.

"Lelia..." Keeland took a step towards the bard, but was interrupted by the orlesian's angry voice.

"Don't touch me! You didn't just wade through her swamp, you rummaged around as if there were endless treasures in it!"

"Perhaps not endless, but priceless at the very least." Morrigan chuckled before continuing, "However this would be my cue to leave."

"No! I'm not finished with you. Don't walk away when I'm talking to you."

Morrigan scoffed.

"Don't forget I'm not without my own pointy ends." Leliana pointed out matter-of-factly narrowing her eyes in to two slits.

"Oh, le gasp, princess stabbity, kill, kill is making me tremble in fear." Morrigan sneered before walking off.

"Of all the..!" The bard exclaimed lunging for the snickering witch.

Keeland caught the bard by her waist. "Come on let's just cool off." She said trying to calm the bard down, a lump as big as a boulder growing in her stomach. This was not good! The bard was very upset and Keeland found herself being scared. She would lose Leliana. She had done it this time, only... she found that the thought of losing the bard was... painful. Why? This was what she did, pushed people away, so why did this make her whole body scream in protest. This was for the better, no?

"Yes? In the lake just like you and Morrigan did?" The bard fumed while glaring daggers at her.

She hung her head shamefully and let go of the bard. "I'm sorry." She said staring at the ground. Her voice trembled. "I... have treated you badly... what I did was wrong... I..."

Leliana watched the elf feeling her temper sober. "Why?" She whispered feeling as if she would break and shatter onto the ground. She loved Keeland, there was no doubt in her mind, but if Keeland didn't feel the same, she wished she would tell her so that she could move on. Keeland didn't answer.

"Please tell me..." Her voice felt dry and weak and nearly broke when she tried to speak.

"Because I love you..." The elf mouthed inaudibly.

The bard felt a jolt in her chest, new hope rising. What was that Keeland had said? "Well you sure as blood and damnation have a funny way of showing it." She snorted.

"I wanted you to hate me..." Keeland mumbled. There wasn't any time to think about what she did or did not say. She hadn't meant to say it, but the feeling was too overwhelming she hadn't much choice in the matter but to tell the bard the truth.

The bard was taken aback at the elf's naked honesty. "Hate you? But _why_?"

"People die around me or they leave." She said flatly before looking into the bard's eyes. "If I made you hate me and you left, then at least I would know it was because I drove you off... not because I wasn't good enough or that you didn't really love me. At least then I'd know you'd be safe. At least I would have _made_ you leave."

"Why would you even think that?" The bard asked angrily.

"My mother left me... she abandoned me. Tamlen left me, he... died, and my clan has been taken away from me. Everything I've ever loved has done nothing more than leave an empty space in my spirit..." the elf's voice trembled violently her eyes blinking profoundly at the bard. "I can't lose you if I don't let you in." Her voice broke off then and her eyes darted to the ground.

"So that's why you... Kee, you are such an idiot!"The bard shook her head watching the young woman in front of her. "Why do you always punish yourself?" She murmured pulling the smaller woman into her arms. At first Keeland resisted then she relaxed into the bard's arms.

"I'm not ready to lose you Keeland, but I can't be wondering if I mean anything to you." She whispered to the lithe frame in her arms.

"You mean everything to me." The elf muttered wrapping her arms around the bard's waist.

"Come, I do not wish to talk anymore." The bard whispered and pulled the elf towards her tent.

They undressed silently and crept into the bedroll.

"If you so much as look at her I will take you down." The bard muttered as she snuggled into the warden's arms. "Don't think I can't do it, because I can..."

Keeland chuckled a little. "Is that a threat or promise?"

Leliana scoffed. "I should be _so_ angry with you! I should make you take a bath before coming to bed with me. Oh, why can't I be angrier with you?" She said in the same frustrated voice she had used a couple of days earlier when she had declared that she was a woman and reserved her rights to be inconsistent.

Keeland smiled as she buried her face in the bard's silky hair before murmuring. "Because I love you..."

0o0o0

0o0o0

_It's the same dream as before. She's in the cave with Tamlen, monsters coming from every corner of the cave. Then they're in front of the mirror. She's screaming at him not to touch it, to step back. He never does. He laughs at her and runs his hand across the smooth and clean surface. _

_He screams the well-known scream which has haunted her dreams, clasps his head with his hands slumping forward. This is where she usually wakes up. He turns to look at her._

"_Come home Lethallan." He whispers edging closer to her in an eerie twitching manner, his body racking in strange spasms. Then his eyes turn into black holes and he screams in a demonic voice. "COME HOME!"_

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **So, I didn't take too long with this update. I've been in a bit of a funk the past couple of days where I couldn't think of anything to write. Whenever I sat down my brain just shut down and the inspiration which usually threatens to burst my head had just evaporated. But my little muse has returned and order has been restored. ^^

On another very happy and good note I find myself doing some work for Ms. Corinne Kempa (voice over for Leliana) so that has kept me busy as well.

Oh, I must give kudos to the following readers:

**Mm-Burnt-Toast-Mm:** For delivering the "Le Gasp" line to me in one of her reviews. Lol! Loved it and just had to use it.

**Bettynuggs:** For reminding me of the wading through the witch's swamp line delivered in the game.

Again a huge thank you to every one of you who reads the story, even huganticer (I know this is not a word, but it sounds fancy, no?) thanks to all of you who review as well. Thank you so much for all the support and encouragement to keep writing!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, if you did please review as it shall brighten up my day. :D

Till next time!

/Elmjuniper

PS. Am still looking for Betas so don't be shy now. :) I'm not picky with experience as long as you can help me with my grammar and spelling. :)


	18. Potions Or Boots?

**POTIONS OR BOOTS?**

THE BARD WAS JOLTED AWAKE by the elf's terrified scream. The elf was sitting up heaving heavily her body covered in sweat. It reminded Leliana of that one night from a few months ago when she'd found Keeland in a similar state. Still groggy she sat up slowly placing her hand on Keeland's shoulder.

"Are you alright?" She asked softly.

Keeland shook her head. "It's so real..." She mumbled.

"Come here." The bard said drawing the elf into her arms. "It's only a dream." She said softly.

"It doesn't feel like a dream." Keeland whispered where she lay. It had felt so real. She could even smell the death and evil radiating from Tamlen's body. She shivered turning to face the sleepy bard.

"You should try and sleep, it's ok I'm right here." The bard whispered caressing her face gently.

She studied the bard's face in the dim light. She was pretty when she was half asleep, her lips still puffy from sleeping. She closed her eyes and felt the bard's breath slow down gradually until she was sound asleep. Keeland twisted a little staring up at the tent's ceiling.

The dream, what had it meant? Why was she having these dreams? Maybe it was the cleansing's doing... maybe it awoke some of the memories from that day in the cave. Perhaps it was her subconscious trying to tell her something? Or could it be Tamlen? She frowned. No, it couldn't be. Her mind drifted off to the witch and the night before remembering the short moment where Morrigan had clung onto her, her vulnerability a naked proof of the loneliness she must feel. It had been strange, yet a little bit reassuring to see the witch in such state proving that she wasn't as cold as she wanted the rest of the companions to believe.

She shook her head. What had possessed her to have sex with the witch except for the fact that she had been more than inviting? She scoffed, what had possessed the witch to have sex with her? Was it all just to goad the bard, it had not seemed like it. She glanced over at the sleeping bard, what was it the bard even saw in her? Technically she hadn't cheated on her, but it still felt like it. She chewed her lip. It was a frightening feeling whatever this feeling was. Wanting to be near the bard, wanting to protect her, keep her out of harm's way.

What she had felt for Tamlen was love, she loved him more than life itself, still she had never offered to give up the freedom of choice for him. Towards the end the thought had crossed her mind, but she never told him. With Leliana it felt different. Was the bard to ask her she would not even hesitate to travel to Orlais and back, into the Beyond and out, to the edge of the world. So what was this power the bard held over her? This was so much more intense than anything she'd felt so far and it puzzled and frightened her. The addiction it caused, the carless passion it brought to the surface, the fear of losing the source of this intense feeling.

She knit her brows feeling the bard's soft finger on her bottom lip.

"Stop brooding and go to sleep." Leliana murmured into her neck.

She chuckled and pulled the bard closer shutting her eyes. The warmth of the bard's naked body next to her made her feel sleepy and she muttered under her breath. Perhaps sleeping wasn't such a bad idea. Listening to the forest sounds outside she knew she had at least four more hours of sleep. She felt herself drift off and before she knew it she was dreaming of peculiar animals standing in line staring at her.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"No, _you _do it." The templar hissed to the elf shoving the small pouch of contents into her hands.

"But _you're _the one with the templar amour. If it explodes... well, you'll be much better off than me." Keeland argued shoving the pouch back at the templar.

"Oh, why thank you, I'm glad to know you find me useful for something." He said dryly.

"Come one Alistair. I'm sure it's harmless, plus everyone's asleep, no one will ever know." She said pushing him towards the end of the camp. "Plus Leliana is..." She glanced over her shoulder. "Well, asleep." She'd woken up after only a few hours sleep and snuck out to keep Alistair company and well to persuade him to help her make a nice potion for the bard which she could use during battle.

The templar muttered underneath his breath. "I can't believe she's so easy on you."

"What?" Keeland's head snapped towards him.

"I mean let's face it. You licked the swooping witch's... lamppost." He said giving her a knowing look before adding. "Don't look so surprised Keeland, everything you do... well we all know about it."

"You have _nothing _better to talk about than me? Really?" She scoffed.

"How would you have felt?"

"Look, I need you to mix the contents together that is all. Anything else, I need you _not _for so stay out of it." She snapped at the templar.

"Be that as it may, someone still needs to call you on your crap. How _would _you feel if Leliana slept with Zevran?"

Keeland snorted in dismay. "_That _would never happen!" Would it? It wouldn't... surely Leliana wouldn't...

"You know she used to be a bard, _seducing _her victims?" Alistair challenged her.

"What has that got to do with anything?!" Keeland was growing impatient with the templar who was really testing her patient. His probing questions were annoying and much to her dismay they did jolt this strange feeling of... jealousy inside her.

He eyed her nodding slightly. "Now imagine how she feels..."

"I'm _making _her a potion what else do you want from me?"

"Actually _I'm _the one making it." He pointed out to her.

She threw her hands in the air. "Fine, you got any better ideas tell me 'cause frankly I think a wicked smoke bomb would have been just the thing."

The templar looked at the elf realizing she was being perfectly serious and burst out in a loud laughter. "Well, it's not very romantic is it?"

She flinched. Romantic? "Ahem..."

"You know... well for example I gave you that rose." He hinted.

She blushed. That had been an awkward moment. She didn't want things to be awkward between her and the bard. "I'm not sure..."

"You know I thought you said women were smarter than men when we first met." He narrowed his eyes at her.

"I also told you to stop thinking of me as a woman."

"Yes well... that would be a little more difficult these days then back then..."

"Oh, do shut up." She said. "Well, Mr. Know-it-all what should I give her then?" Keeland inquired impatiently.

"I thought you weren't a romantic." He sneered.

"I'm not." She answered shortly.

"Of course you aren't and since you're not why not considering giving her a letter explaining how you feel." He said only to find the elf stare at him in horror.

"Did you not see the note I scribbled when Marjolaine was trying to stir things up?"

"Oh yes that... my mistake, I forgot..."

Keeland shook her head and opened her mouth to say something when she saw Wynne climb out from her tent. Grinning wildly she excused herself walking up to the mage.

"Goooood morning Wynne." She cooed as innocently as she could.

Wynne narrowed her eyes before returning her greeting. "Good morning to you too. You slept well I take it?"

"Very much so thank you. How are you feeling today?" It was a genuine question. The older mage had been exerting herself quite a bit lately and Keeland was worried she might be feeling more tired than she let on.

"I suppose there wouldn't be any use in lying to you." The mage said wearily. "I am feeling unusually tired today."

Keeland looked concerned at her. "Here sit, let me fetch you breakfast."

Wynne dismissed her assistance. "I'm tired not incapable of doing things myself just yet."

It earned her a grin from the elf. "Fine, but will you please not exert yourself."

The mage's face softened. "Your concern is heart warming, and yes I promise. Now, was it something you needed?"

Keeland's face lit up. "I was going to ask you for a favour... you know how you have all those left over silky mage cloths?"

"Yes?"

"I was wondering if I could perhaps have a few..." Keeland asked looking bashful.

"You want those strips of silk, leftovers from bandaging?"

"M-hm." Keeland nodded eagerly.

"What would you possibly want to do with... oooh." Wynne caught the slight blush spreading across the elf's cheeks and smiled approvingly. "Wait here." She said and disappeared into her tent returning with her hands full of strips of silky fabric.

"Thanks a million Wynners!" Keeland chimed taking off to her own tent and disappeared into it.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"She is not seriously going to walk around in those?" The witch scoffed at the bard, glancing over at her where they walked on the forest path to Redcliffe.

The antivan chuckled at the bard in her boots which Keeland had adorned with red-silky bows, one on each boot. Zevran could still remember the bard's high-pitched squeal when Keeland had presented the boots for her yesterday. The bard had sat by the fire stirring the stew in her bowl when Keeland appeared from her tent her hands hidden secretively behind her back. When Keeland had held out the boots in front of the bard she squealed and flew to her feet so that bowl and spoon fell to the ground, Pork Chop happily helping himself to the spilled food. And much to Zevran' delight the bard had shown their elvish leader her gratitude by giving her a _very _passionate kiss. He smiled at the memory making a mental note that he would have to blow off some steam at The Pearl the next time they went to Denerim.

"It's not so bad is it?" He said to the witch who simply grunted at him.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Merrill had always been quite dominant and blunt, but this time she found that she was none of this. Had it been a few months ago she would have simply dismissed the whole happening as Fenarel's wild imagination though this time she was keener to believe his delusional ramblings.

"Merrill." The young hunter interrupted her thoughts.

She turned around looking gravely at him. "Find Keeland, and do it quickly. She must return for the Keeper knows not how else to deal with this. We need the Grey Wardens."

She watched the hunter scurry off praying silently to the Creators that he would reach Keeland before it was too late.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**DISCLAIMER: **BioWare owns everything you recognize from Dragon Age: Origins, names, places, objects etc. Everything else is mine all mine. Keeland, nymph root etc. :) Though I'm not the possessive type so use whatever you want to (except for Keeland).

**A/N: **Well, I have officially fried my brain tonight. A fluffy little chapter for everyone who likes it. :) Keeland is trying her best to make amends, a lot of readers have been quite angry with her, good, she can't be loved by all!

Hope you enjoyed this and if so you know what to do in order to make my spring even more awesome. ^^

For anyone who's interested I've also updated: **To The Edge Of The World**. Go check it out. ^^

Till next update!

/Elmjuniper


	19. Walk A Mile In My Shoes

**WALK A MILE IN MY SHOES**

"THOSE ARE REALLY INTERESTING." Bann Teagan said as he studied the bard's ribboned boots.

Leliana smiled her coy smile, batting her eyelids a sweet giggle escaping her plum lips.

They had reached Redcliffe safe and sound without any disturbances from darkspawns. Bann Teagan had been more than relieved to see them alive, but Keeland had a sneaky suspicion that the real reason for his happiness was the fact that they carried the ashes with them that would save Arl Eamon.

They were waiting for the Arl to wake up when the Bann came out to them directing his attention to the alluring redheaded bard. Keeland knit her eyebrows at the scene displayed in front of her. Why was the bard blushing? Her gaze darted to the Bann, _why _was the Bann winking? Green eyes darted back to the bard. _Is she bashing her eyelashes?_ Her frown grew deeper. The Bann fired off a charming smile leaning in towards the bard's ear whispering something. The bard giggled and placed her soft hand on his arm. _What? No! _She shuffled in her chainmail so that the two of them would remember they were not alone. The bard and the Bann did however not seem to notice. The other companions sat engaged in a discussion behind her and she turned away from the bard and tried to partake in the discussion.

"I'm sure she said forty silvers." Alistair said knowingly. The antivan assassin protested loudly at this pointing out how very unfair this was since he did not have forty silvers. Turning to the Mage he opened his mouth to speak before Wynne's stern voice interrupted him.

"No Zevran, I will not sponsor your carousing in the Pearl. Either you have the coins or you shall simply have to… make do."

The elf chuckled before Leliana's voice caught her attention again.

"You are too kind." She heard the bard's sultry voice say to the Bann.

_Kind, why was he being kind to the bard? Could he __**not **__be kind? _Much to her dismay Keeland felt her temper flare and she clenched her fists so hard her knuckles turned white.

"...dinner tonight?" She heard Bann Teagan ask.

The bard said something which Keeland couldn't decipher before the bard chimed. "I would like that very much." Then she left the Bann hanging returning to the group.

Keeland pinched the bridge of her nose squeezing her eyes shut as the bard slid down next to her the skin of her thigh grazing gently against the warden's hand. Keeland pursed her lips and started to whirl the small dagger she usually had sheathed in her boot between her fingers.

"Hey..." the bard said in her soft devoted voice.

_Hey my ass! _Keeland fumed in her head. "Alistair I need to talk to you." Keeland snapped at the surprised warden. Standing up she walked out of the grand room into the corridor the blonde warden following her silently.

"You're upset." He pointed out when they reached the corridor.

"I'm not." She bit off.

"You're acting..."

"I _said_ I'm _**not**_!" She raised her voice before biting her tongue. She was, and she knew she shouldn't be taking it out on the warden.

"Ok..." He said grimacing at the tone of her voice. He knew better than to aggravate her when she was like this.

"Where do we go next?" She asked him pacing back and forth.

"You're asking me? Shouldn't we go seek out the Dalish?"

"Yes. Of course." She said pacing off to the window and turning back.

"Kee, will you stop that you're making me dizzy!" The warden put his hands on her shoulders lowering his face so that she stared into his soothing eyes.

Her shoulder slumped and she buried her face in his chest mumbling, and sighing heavily.

"Come on Kee, what's wrong? You know I'm a _pretty _good listener."

"Nah non nike nour nunle..." Her words were muffled by his chestplate.

"Err... You're not going to make this easy, are you?" He said sighing putting his arms around her.

She shook her head sulking into his armour. She was being silly, and she didn't care! She felt hurt by the bard's flirtations with the Bann. She reprimanded herself for being so weak letting her emotions get the better of her. She should ignore it and let the bard do whatever she wished to do. She held no ownership over her. _If she wants to go to dinner with the Bann then so be it, see if I care!_

0o0o0

0o0o0

The bard smiled a little to herself where she sat. By this time she had learnt Keeland's mannerisms and knew what that little pinch had meant and despite herself she felt quite smug. Keeland was jealous! It wasn't so much that she was interested in the Bann, not at all in fact, but she knew she'd been far too easy on the warden and it was only fair that the warden should understand how she felt whenever the warden would go over and sit by the witch, their heads bent close together. It was torturous to be reminded of that night every time she saw them together. But the warden had suffered long enough; she would go out and talk to her.

She stood up walking towards the corridor coming to a halt when she saw Alistair embrace the elf. Jealousy and hurt flared inside her before she took a deep breath.

"I... am I interrupting something?" She saw the elf's head stick out from the warden's arm scowling at her.

"Yes you are. Go away." Keeland said hiding behind the warden again.

Alistair squealed in a nervous laughter not wanting to get caught in the crossfire. "Ah! Nooo... no not really."

Growing impatient the bard put her hands on her hips. "Keeland Mahariel, don't you _dare _hide behind Alistair! You come out from there _right now_!"

"Err... I'm just... oh look, cheese!" Alistair chirped with an awkward voice taking off like a scared rabbit.

Keeland crossed her arms narrowing her eyes at the bard striding towards her.

"What do you want?" Keeland said vehemently.

"You are being obnoxious." Leliana stated.

"And you are being a typical bard." Keeland snapped feeling the last restrain on her temper fly out the window.

"What does that mean?" Leliana asked her voice rising slightly.

"What do you _think _it means? No wait don't answer that, you'll be later for _dinner_."

"Wait, no! That's not fair, I was only..."

Keeland waved her hand in a dismissive gesture. "Just, don't bother. I get it we're _not... _not! And you're free to sleep with whomever you choose, even if he's a big poncy."

"You... you are _so _obstinate!"

"And you're... driving me crazy!" Keeland shouted back at the bard not caring the witch's head popping out from around the corner, eyes gleaming.

A smiled played on the bard's lips as she determinedly grabbed a hold of the angry warden. "Will you just shut up?"

Keeland growled at her. "Fine."

"If you would only listen before you let your temper get the best of you. I just wanted you to know..." Leliana said softly.

"Know what?"

"How I feel about you and Morrigan."

"Oh..." Keeland said feeling rather stupid.

"I'm not going to that dinner, I've already told the Bann that I'm... with you."

"You... what?!" Keeland spluttered in disbelief.

"Well, you slept with Morrigan, and you say you love me, so really Kee... you better start fess up to people who you're with. I'm with _you_. I'm not in this alone and I'm not going to lie about who I love."

"I, but, I..." Keeland fell silent. Leliana had told the Bann she was with Keeland. She felt a smug feeling creep on to her. Grinning she looked up at the bard. "Does that mean I no longer have to set up my tent when we camp?"

The bard chuckled throatily before nodding. "Yes."

The witch scoffed behind their backs.

"Oh shush you harpy." The bard quoted Keeland from an earlier conversation she had had with the witch before she leaned in and kissed the elf sweetly. "Come now… Let's make use of the little time we've got left before the Arl wakes up." The bard said pulling the warden along with her towards the one of the rooms they were staying in.

0o0o0

0o0o0

Lanaya stood by the border of the Dalish camp when she saw the young hunter from a sister clan approach. He looked weary, as if he'd been travelling without stopping.

"Andaran atish'an sister." He panted as he came to a stop at their entrance.

"Aneth ara." She nodded towards him. "You are form our neighbouring clan, what brings you here?"

"I am looking for a Grey Warden and rumours say she is to be found here."

"You are talking about Keeland, are you not?" Lanaya asked motioning for him to follow her as she picked her steps towards the Keeper's hut.

"You know of her?" The young hunter asked in surprise.

"I… yes, we've met, quite recently in fact. Why are you looking for her?" The young elf woman inquired.

"She must come home." He answered shortly.

"Must come home?"

"I'm afraid my Keeper told me not to say anything else." He said.

"What can be so important you call upon a sister to come home, abandoning a responsibility such as hers?"

His eyes met hers something strange mirrored in them. "The rise of the fallen."

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **Oooh the plot thickens and Kee got a taste of her own medicine. And she very well deserved it!

Huge thanks to all my subscribers and anyone who has faved me, my stories and an even bigger thanks to all of you who keep reviewing and giving me support! Yay, I luuuuurve you all. ^^

**NEWS!** I've got a request from one of my readers if she could create Fanart for this story, how cool is that?! And she's well talented as well. It's Tutchangers, you can find her on DeviantArt by doing a search on "Confrontation & Dragon Age" or you could just click in to my profile and use the link form there. I feel really honoured and am very impressed by how well se captured Keeland! Go check it out!

For anyone interested in knowing more about the work I'm doing for Corinne Kempa, I'm not all sure I'm allowed to say what it is yet, but when I get the get go I'll let you all know. :)

As always I hope you enjoyed and to make me happy and keep me writing, do review. It makes me feel loved. ;)

Till next time!

/Elmjuniper


	20. Ghost Of The Past

**GHOST OF THE PAST**

WYNNE STUDIED THE COMPANIONS FROM where she sat. There was that strange quanari Sten, who never spoke, but seemed to have quite a firm believe in what was right and wrong. This manifested itself in various ways, but usually in how he reacted to their leader's decisions. It was sometimes quite amusing to see his reactions to their stubborn leader. He would wear his stone mask, but his eyes would be full of confusion as he knit his brows looking grumpier than ever.

She glanced over at the Antivan Crow who masked his insecurities and desperate longing for acceptance and intimacy by his suave attitude. At first she had honestly thought that he was indeed a sex-obsessed perverted little elf and they had had several discussions about her magical bosom, but in time the crow had let his guard down and it was a child's game to read him. The mage had seen through his mask though, seen how he watched their one couple interact with each other, a sad look on his face. When she confronted him about it he simply explained that he was very sad to see such beautiful women engage in something other than him, but the mage knew it had very little to do with that. A tad bit surely, but not mainly.

Keeland and Leliana. She studied them, heads bent close together, the warden's hand which slew darkspawns mercilessly during the day rested calmly on the bard's thigh where she sat leaning into the warden. Both Keeland and the bard seemed to have found a sense of calmness in each other's company. Keeland seemed calmer, more light hearted and not so serious and angry all the time. The bard shone with pride and seemed less fidgety and more secure in her vision from The Maker. She had even put the witch in her place the other day. Keeland seemed to have strong feelings for the bard, always placing herself next to her in battle, taking whatever damage would have been dealt at the bard, but never recklessly so that the other companion's safety was compromised.

Her gaze traced the campfire until it fell upon the blonde templar. Things had not come to this painlessly. The elf had taken no prisoners and Alistair still pined for her. Wynne saw his longing gazes, the hurt displayed fleetingly in his eyes whenever Keeland would pull the bard into her arms giving her an affectionate kiss. Even the witch whom the mage held no love for seemed to long to be touched by the warden again. Yes, they had all found about Morrigan's and Keeland's little... meeting. And it was clear that the witch had enjoyed it very much, seeking the stolen touches from the warden every now and then, a quick brush on the arm, pressing herself close when showing how to mix potions, purring seductively when talking to the warden. Wynne had no doubt the witch merely wanted the physical aspects of the warden and not so much the emotional part. It was an interesting situation and the mage couldn't help but wonder where Keeland thought it was all leading to.

Wynne smiled a little remembering being in Keeland's age. He had been one of the mages, quite a few years her senior and he had swept her off her feet. Indran. A coy smile crept on to her face.

Indran had been quite the charmer with his sparkling grey eyes and attractive smile. Wynne had loved his beard and how he stroked it thoughtfully when presented with a dire problem. He had arrived at the circle to help the first enchanter with the cataloguing of phylacteries. The first time Wynne had spoken to him was just before the Harrowing. She had been nervous and hadn't paid attention to where she was going. Her staff flew across the stony hallway as she crashed into him. When she saw that it was the bedazzling, handsome mage her cheeks had redden as she mumbled her excuse. He had smiled and asked her name mentioning that he was to supervise her during the Harrowing. Wynne had finished it without much problem. Indran had been very impressed, much to her delight. The old mage chuckled as she thought about the months that had passed and how the two of them seemed to spend more time together. She remembered the intense feelings of passion and love. How they seemed to spend any time they could together and when Wynne had become pregnant few were surprised. A slight feeling of sadness jolted her chest. Her son had been beautiful, his eyes a mixture of her own and Indran's. She stared at the ground imagining his face, what he would look like. Did he have his father's voice? Her soothing logic? She sighed. Not a day went by without her thinking about him. It was a natural thing for a mother, though she tried to lessen the dull emptiness within her heart by not thinking about it too much.

It had been fairly easy ever since they had arrived at the Dalish camp in the Brecilian Forest. They had battled their way through the forest and the werewolves' lair. When they had reached the Lady of The Forest the mage had felt weary and tired, even more than usual. Keeland had taken to keeping an extra eye on her ever since she collapsed on the dirt road a few days ago and she had felt the warden's eyes burn at her when the fight was over. Nudging the bard towards her the bard came up with her skin of water. Wynne had smiled at the two of them taking it gratefully.

The battle had been – as usual, very intense, but with Keeland in the lead they seemed to be able to destroy whatever came in their way. Not without injuries though. Keeland had had the misfortune to be caught in the middle of a group of werewolves. She had come out of it no doubt, but her chainmail had been battered and clawed at and one of the werewolves had caught her at the side cutting her deep across the soft flesh of her lower ribs. The stubborn elf hadn't said anything though until they reached camp and the bard saw her sway lightheaded from the blood loss. The templar had managed to receive a fierce blow from one of those beastly trees Zathrian had summoned and his skin had open up across his eyes. Morrigan had been thrown into the lair's stony wall and was mending her own broken ribs since the mage was not allowed to help her. Wynne scoffed. Sten seemed to come out of battle unharmed every time. Perhaps it was the sheer size of him that made him sturdier than the rest of them because it wasn't as if he never received a blow. He took the same damage as everyone else you just couldn't see it.

Lanaya the new Keeper had been relieved to see their safe return, but when she realized her Elder would not return she had looked grief-stricken yet held her composure. This was when things had been getting interesting aside from the fact the bard kept throwing dark glances at Lanaya whenever she would take the warden aside to talk to her placing her hand on the warden's arm. The bard would knit her brows in a frown when Keeland laughed and placed her hand on the Keeper's shoulder leaning her head into it as she laughed. Wynne drew the conclusion that the Keeper might be part of Keeland's take no prisoners streak.

When they had return from the werewolves' lair the Keeper had taken Keeland aside so that no one could hear them. She wore a serious look on her face. They saw their leader quirk her eyebrow cocking her head. Lanaya shrugged her shoulders and shook her head. A few more words had been exchanged before the warden had returned looking grim.

"Is something wrong?" The bard had asked gently.

Keeland shrugged. "I'm not sure. My clan needs me to go home."

They all looked at each other. Home? What did that mean? When would she be back?

It seemed their leader had learnt to read their reactions. "My clan is Dalish as you all know, we're nomadic which means my home is not where it was a few months ago, but it is time for the Gathering so we shall go there."

It seemed as if most of them exhaled in relief.

"You didn't think I would take off on my own..?" She stared suspiciously at them.

"No, of course not." Alistair said cheerfully the rest of the group nodding a little too eagerly in agreement.

"Uh-huh..." She said narrowing her eyes folding her arms.

"Why do you have to go home?" The witch asked curiously.

"I don't know. Tynan, the hunter who delivered the message had not told her why."

"And you simply trust it's important enough to do this detour?" The witch asked in annoyance.

"Just as important as killing your _mother_." Keeland retorted.

"Fine. Have it your way." Morrigan scoffed.

Now here they were camping for the night as they picked their way through the Brecilian Forest to find the Gathering. Wynne had to admit to herself that it would be interesting indeed to see such marvellous event take place. Not many humans could say they had been to the Dalish elves Gathering.

0o0o0

0o0o0

The elves' distinguishing aravels lay scattered across the valley and elves mingled and went about their business, little children playing and running around the camp. Wynne couldn't say she had ever seen so many elves at the same time. She cast a glance at their leader who drew a deep breath and closed her eyes thinking no one saw her doing it.

They could feel the scent of elvish food being cooked mix and mingle with the distinctive elvish incense. The mage could only imagine how very familiar it must be to Keeland and by the look on her face she had missed it terribly. To the companions' surprise the elf picked up her speed, eager to reach the camp no longer walking wearily or treading carefully in case a group of darkspawns would be waiting for them around the corner. They all hurried after her. A dark-haired woman turned her head at the descending elf and called out the elvish warden's name. This whipped the warden into a mad dash, laughing happily as a group of elves met her halfway. They all tried to hug her at the same time, Keeland beaming in the middle. The group had stayed a distance away knowing this was one of the few moments Keeland needed to put herself first.

Wynne and the companions saw the group of elves part as an older elf woman walked up Keeland. The woman took Keeland's face between her hands and studied it teary eyed before pulling the younger elf into a forceful hug. Keeland seemed to be leaning in fully, releasing all tension, letting her guard down completely as she seemed to weep in exhaustion and happiness. To watch the affectionate moment was so overwhelming and Wynne could see the sensitive bard's eyes dampen with tears. She blinked them away smiling. The mage could see the templar blink just as furiously as the bard in the corner of her eye. Even the cold hearted witch seemed to be a little taken by it all. When the two elven women broke free Keeland seemed to be saying something and everyone turned their head towards them. Keeland waved with her hand at them grinning a little and the group decided it was ok to join her.

The Keeper and her clan welcomed Keeland's companions – if not wholeheartedly, at least politely.

"Who's the flat-ear?"An elven male asked suspiciously nodding towards Zevran.

"Why, are you interested perhaps?" The blond assassin said in a flirtatious voice.

Keeland laughed at Fagan's expression and took the bard by her hand when a well familiar voice reached her ears.

"Lethallin, care to give this old man a hug?"

Keeland spun around staring at the blonde, grey eyed elf smiling charmingly.

"Tamlen?" Her heart raced and she found it hard to breathe then the world went black and she crashed headlong towards the ground.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N: **Hey all, I'm sorry about the late update... Not sure what to say about this chapter, stemmed from a... ugh... I hope you liked it.

**NEWS! **Another fanart has been made by **Tutchangers**. The latest art is from One Night In Denerim and it's sooo cute! ^^

Go find her at Deviant Art's website (simply do a search for 'Denerim' and the pic should pop up - it's called "one night in denerim") or go to my profile and clink the link to her gallery.

Till next time.

/Elmjuniper


	21. Say Goodbye

**SAY GOODBYE**

"Kee? Kee..." His big calloused hand caressed her face as he kissed her amiably over and over again.

She put her small hand on his smiling. It _was _him. He was real. Had it all just been a dream? She pulled him close feeling his body next to hers, warm and alive. She still couldn't fathom that he was there. She liked his kisses, they were nice. She tasted his lips a little. They didn't taste like before and even though they had done this a million times it felt quite strange and awkward. Something was amiss, what was it? She opened her eyes looking at him ruffling his hair. He laughed and put his arm around her and pulled her up. Standing up again reality came back to her and she remembered where she was. Turning she saw the companions staring at her.

Alistair looked sad and awkward staring at the man he had replaced for one night, or at least tried to. Keeland felt a little sorry for him but then her eyes found the bard. Leliana had never been very good at hiding her emotions and she had moved to the back of the group. She looked as if she had been struck by a poisonous arrow through her heart. Even Morrigan scowled a little disapprovingly at the elf when she saw Leliana's face. Looking closer Keeland could see the bard's fingers shaking and she looked pale and weary. She tried to catch her eyes but the bard was blinking furiously at the ground refusing to look at her.

She turned her face towards her betrothed then back to the bard. Her mind reeling. She was betrothed, but did her heart really belong to the Dalish elf smiling next to her, his arms still wrapped around her? Looking at the bard she felt something stir. _Look at me! _But bard kept hiding behind the large quanari, unshed tears overflowing her eyes as they fell to the mossy ground. Keeland sighed and grabbed Tamlen by his hand.

"Meet me here by nightfall. _Don't _be late." She said to the group. Still watching the bard she added. "I... expect _all _of you to be here. I have business I must attend to. For now Fagan will take care of you."

She dragged the blonde elf along to one of the aravels. Upon entering it he shoved her hard against the small dresser kissing her feverously.

She broke free from him laughing. "Ho there big boy!"

"I have_ missed_ you Kee. I never thought I'd see you again after that day in the cave."

She swallowed hard. "We... I looked for you. I... turned those caves inside out." Suddenly she felt anger and hurt wash over her and she shoved him hard in his chest. "I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD!" She screamed at him, not caring if the whole Gathering could hear her.

"I'm sorry Kee..." He said slowly taking a step closer towards her. "I didn't..."

"No! You can't do this to me! How dare you? I mourned you for months! I buried you. Your ghost hunted me. I... I let you go." Her shoulder slumped as she lowered her head turning her face away to hide her angry tears.

He grabbed her gently by her face pulling it towards his so that he could look her in the eyes. "I didn't die. I'm sorry that I put you through all this pain and anguish."

"What happened to you? Why are you not... dead?"

"I'm not sure. I woke up several days later with these strange voices in my head. There was this constant singing urging me to seek it out. I was so painful..." His voice turned serious as he stared blankly in front of him. "I can still hear it. The illness burned through my body and I thought I was going to die. Can you imagine Kee, a body with so much pain and add to that the constant calling of... these monstrous gods..."

"But _how_ could you have survived?" Keeland persisted.

"You."

"What?"

"You kept me alive. I stayed alive because of you. Because the last thing we did was fight and I wanted to make it right. The thought of seeing you, telling you that I was sorry and that I loved you... it kept me alive. I promised that if I survived this and got to see you again I would grow up and take responsibility becoming the husband you needed me to be."

"Tamlen..." She said quietly before he kept talking.

"When I reached our camp the clan was since long gone. I took me months to find them again. I nearly killed Fenarel. I was delusional I thought he was the beast who kept singing in my ear. I'm glad I was delusional with fever or else… I might have killed him."

"But how could you survive the taint?"

"The taint does not kill you over night Keeland, you should know, and when I finally reached the clan again, the keeper used her magic to... slow down the taint and remove the curse on me."

"But you're still tainted." She shook her head.

"Yes... there is no cure."

"There is..."

He dismissed her comment with a scowl. "Lethallin what are you doing with those _Shems_?" His words sounded almost disgusted as he referred to her small band of peculiar misfits.

She sighed. "Tamlen... there is a cure. I'm not who I used to be..."

"You're a Grey Warden." He said bitterly. "The Keeper says that joining the Grey Wardens is the only way to survive the taint, that they have the cure."

She nodded fiddling with the straps on her armour.

"But I'm not joining." He said determinedly.

She stared up at him in disbelief. "WHAT?!"

"I'm not Keeland. I came back to be with you even if it was for just one day. We all die Keeland, joining the Grey Wardens only slows down the inevitable."

"But you'll live Tamlen." Keeland argued.

"For what? Look at you Kee, what have you done these past months? Fought a war which is not your own. You join the wardens to survive, only to battle until you die? Tell me Keeland, what kind of life is that?"

"There is _nothing _wrong with the life I lead now. I'm doing something to change things and those Shems you're talking about are my _friends_." She said a little angrier than she meant to.

"I see you come to like those people quite a bit." He said slowly before shaking his head. "But I cannot spend the days left of my life on the road fighting." He stared into her eyes. "Please don't ask that of me. I'm sure the Keeper intends to ask you to convince me."

"So that's why the Keeper wanted me to come back so badly or was it mainly because she thought I'd be happy to see you?" Keeland wondered out loud.

Tamlen shot her a strange look. "_Thought_?"

Keeland buried her face in her hands. She was betrothed to Tamlen, there was no... changing that. She was _Dalish _foremost and Grey Warden secondly. No matter the oath she had taken, the oath to her clan, to Tamlen was stronger. It was unbreakable, unless... Tamlen gave her up, and he wouldn't. She couldn't possibly ask that of him. Not after what he had been through. They had loved each other since long before she became a Grey Warden. How could she leave him? She left him in the caves once. He'd come back for her, how could see let him down again? She loved him more than… most, but when she thought of the redheaded bard her heart skipped a beat, tumbled around, and thumped wildly. She looked up at him through tired eyes. As much as she had feelings for the sweet bard, she was betrothed and her duty as his future wife lay with him, not they Grey Wardens, or the bard. This choice just as all the others had been lately, was not hers to make.

0o0o0

0o0o0

The minute she saw the blonde elf step out from the crowd and Keeland fainted next to her, her small hand slipping out from hers, Leliana had known it would be the last time she held it. Seeing Keeland's lost love rise from the dead was like seeing her whole happiness be snatched away in front of her. The bard cried into her hands where she sat hiding outside the large encampment.

Watching Keeland's small hand on Tamlen's, how she smiled into his kisses had broken her to no ends. It was worse than seeing her with the witch. At least then she knew it had nothing to do with… _love_. Of course Keeland would choose him! She had loved him since before she even knew the bard existed, and even though she would have picked Keeland over Marjolaine she knew this was not the same. She could not be mad at her or resent her for following her heart, but being near her without her touch, without her love… she wept uncontrollably unable to stop, when suddenly she felt the elf's arms pull her into an embrace.

Soft lips crashed down upon her own assaulting her swollen lips, tongues mingling, tasting salty from her tears. The bard placed her hands on Keeland's cheeks kissing her with fervour afraid that if she broke off the elf would disappear. She pressed her body hard against the elf grinding her groin against her when Keeland broke free, a serious look on her face.

Leliana swallowed hard. She knew that look by now, and she knew what the warden had come to tell her. Keeland opened her mouth to speak, but the bard covered it with her hand, shaking her head.

"Please don't…"

"But I have to…" Keeland stared, but the redheaded bard silenced her with kisses, releasing her of her clothes.

"I don't want to talk." Leliana said as she pushed the elf's hand towards her warmth, closing her eyes as fingers became one with flesh.

0o0o0

0o0o0

"You are what?!" Alistair shot to his feet throwing his arms in the air.

"If 'tis some dim witted joke of yours you must have hit your head one too many times if you think it's funny." The witch said in disgust.

"I knew you weren't a real Grey Warden." The quanari spoke knowingly.

"You are a Grey Warden Keeland your oath is not to be taken lightly. It is not something you can just choose to leave." The weathered old mage stated solemnly.

"I have collected an army for you. Lanaya's clan will join you as well as some of mine. We have the mages and the soldiers of Redcliffe on our side. You will not need me anymore." The elf stated sternly. She was no longer dressed in her heavy chainmail armour, but wore the distinguished Dalish leather armour again.

"You _can't _do this!" Alistair said desperately.

"I can and I will. My life is my own, not matter what I drank that day. I will not journey any further with you." The elf spoke her voice full of authority. It was unusual to see the elf this polite, and calm, yet determined and political.

"Think carefully about this child. It is not only your life that will be impacted by your decision. You took the oath to serve the people of Thedas. It is not to be looked lightly upon and this is not the time to be selfish." Wynne advised heatedly.

Suddenly the elf's eyes burned with ferocity. "You can certainly _try _to stop me, but know that I will not hesitate to kill you. This is _my _clan, mine to lead, my responsibility."

"I can't believe your doing this. You're just going to abandon us?" The templar said in disgust.

"I have responsibilities to these people as well. I cannot close my eyes to that fact. I need to lead them north, away from the blight." Keeland turned towards the templar. "It is your time to lead now whether you like it or not."

He refused to look at her shaking his head.

"See it as practice." She tried to joke with him, but he simply turned around and walked away followed by the rest of the companions, all shaking their heads. All save one who had pulled her cloak close, the hood covering the painful expression on her face leaving the former warden standing alone watching them walk away into the dark dissolving into thin air.

THE END?

* * *

**DISCLAIMER: **Everything you recognize from Dragon Age: Origins is the property of BioWare. I'm just borrowing them to show my eternal love for the game and its characters. No copyrights infringement intended.

**A/N: **Keeland has left the group and this might be the ending… or will it not be? It's up to you guys. Really, this is one of those moments where the reader gets to decide. ;) Use it well!

**NEWS! **So the very talented Fanart artist **Tutchangers** is wondering if any of you guys would like to see any particular scene from this story illustrated. Got any suggestions? Which is your favourite scene? Favourite moment? You want to see a Keeland/Leliana illustration? Well, let us know and we'll see which one Tutchangers will choose.

Thanks to everyone who has faved, subscribed, read, and reviewed this story!

Till next time…??

/Elmjuniper


	22. Feelings Asunder

**FEELINGS ASUNDER**

THE ELF LINGERED BY THE edge of the large encampment as her inner feelings raised turmoil within her. She swayed a little as one part of her decided to sprint after the small group, the other part holding her back. She found it hard to breathe as she searched desperately for the bard's lithe frame but darkness had swallowed her whole. She wanted to scream at the top of her lounges to rid herself from this painful feeling, but hung her head as she realized it was too late now.

Why did she go back? She should have just left it. She should have ignored the Keeper's calling. She cursed herself under her breath. She knew the others wouldn't understand. She had seen it in Alistair's eyes, how he questioned this newfound sense of responsibility, where it had come from. How could they? They were not from a clan they did not know the rules. They did not know of the responsibility you had towards the clan. It was not like joining the Grey Wardens. Joining the Grey Wardens was a choice, a clan you were born into. Your loyalty would always lie with your clan, this was the core values she had been taught since childhood, it was your clan that mattered nothing else and her clan had been thrown into the threat of the blight and whether she liked it or not she had a responsibility to help lead the clan to the north, away from the blight but foremost she had a responsibility to Tamlen, an arrangement which had been between made their Elders long before she was even born. She had done her part for the Grey Wardens they would have to defeat the archdemon without her. She shook her head. Who was she trying to convince? Even if it had been written in the old lore she still would have felt disheartened and broken as she had watched the one person who meant the most to her disappear into the dark woods.

"Da'len." The Keeper placed herself next to the former warden. "When I sent you away to join the Grey Wardens I did not do so lightly."

Keeland turned her head towards the Keeper facing her old mentor.

"Why did you stay da'len? You know we can't out run the blight even if you try your hardest to get the clans as far away as possible."

"You called for me Keeper. I only did what I was asked to do."

"I called for you and the other Grey Wardens to come and save Tamlen, to have him initiated to the wardens. I did not call you back to stay and leave your commitment to the wardens." The Keeper sounded stern almost angry.

"I've done what the Grey Wardens asked of me, Keeper." The younger elf answered evasively.

"You have only done what the Grey Wardens have asked of you when you've helped defeat the blight." The Keeper reprimanded her. "I do not understand your decision to stay."

0o0o0

0o0o0

"She _left_! I can't believe she left! How could she do this to me!" The templar fumed as they set camp for the night.

"To _you_?" The mage gave him a questioning look as she helped him erect one of the tents. When he looked up at her in surprise at the tone of her voice she merely nodded towards the pale looking bard sitting silently outside her tent.

The lute lay untouched next to her and she did not even glance towards the instrument which had entertained the whole group during their travels so far. She still wore the cloak tightly wrapped around her as if to compensate the absent warmth of the elvish warden's arms. She stared blankly in front of her as her silent tears trickled down her rosy cheeks.

"Should we..?" He asked Wynne who shook her head.

"No, not now. I'll talk to her later on."

Alistair nodded solemnly. "How could she leave?" He repeated in shock.

The mage shook her head disapprovingly. "It does seem out of character. I'm not entirely sure it was a choice she made lightly."

"But _what _could possibly be so grave that she would abandon us, her quest to end the blight." Alistair ranted.

"How exactly is it any more _her _quest than yours and mine?" The bard's cold voice cut through the night air. She stood up, crossing her arms staring venomously at him. "How dare you judge her after all that she's done to stop the blight? Any of you!" She stared from each one of the companions at the camp.

"I supposed this could qualify as later..." The mage said quietly through the corner of her mouth to the templar before stepping up towards the bard.

"Come, let us talk." She said softly placing a hand on the bards arm.

The bard retracted her arm as if stung by something. "No. I do not wish to talk right now. " She answered monotonously before retreating into her tent leaving the camp silent.

0o0o0

0o0o0

They journeyed north across Ferelden towards Orzammar – the city of dwarves. It was a slow hazardous journey and the Ferelden sky seemed to have opened itself wide, the rain pouring down on them soaking them to their very bones making them miserable. They pulled their cloaks closer, huddling underneath the thick spruces and pines.

Not many words had been spoken since they left their leader and the elf encampment. Alistair shook his head. Keeland had left so hasty none of them had had time to react properly. At first he felt angry and betrayed. She had promised to stick with him that day outside Flemeth's hut still when he looked over his shoulder she was nowhere to be found.

He glanced over at Leliana where she walked. She put on a strong face, smiling and talking to the others, but she hadn't touched her lute or told a story since Keeland left. She had lost a great amount of weight and he was worried her strength would fail her were they to enter battle. He felt weary too. He barely slept, keeping watch most nights. As he sat by the campfire he would listen to the bard sobbing in choking gasps, quietly letting her heartbreak fall to the ground until she fell into a restless sleep. She would toss and turn waking up every so often then as soon as the birds started singing she would leave her bedroll and sit by the campfire next to him.

Alistair shook his head. What was he supposed to do now? He was not ready for this. He didn't even know where to start. How had Keeland done this? How had she known what to do and where to go? He sighed scratching his head. "Where are you...?" He grumbled.

0o0o0

"Do you love her?" He asked bitterly.

"What?" Keeland looked up from the bow she was working on.

"That redhead shemlen?"

Leliana. It had been a week since she watched her companions leave the camp and she wondered how far they had gotten by now. They too were heading north, where they ahead of them? Travelling unknowingly along side each other? The thought of the bard made her ache with such suppressed longing she thought she might scream. She bit her lip. "I don't know what you're talking about..."

He studied her intently. "You haven't eaten properly since they left, you don't sleep and you're not here when we..." He fell silent.

She cringed a little inwardly feeling guilty about the reaction the thought of them being intimate with each other caused. She imagined the bard's soft hands and lips, closing her eyes, whispering the bard's name silently when Tamlen made love to her.

"I'm just not that hungry I guess..." She answered evasively.

He sat silent next to her for quite some time before voicing his thoughts. "You're my best friend, am I yours?"

It was a strange question. "Yes..."

"And you _do _love me?"

Where was he going with this? "I do..."

"Then... why can't you be honest with me? I know you Kee and I'm not a complete fool. I saw you holding her hand, and the way you looked at her. Where did you go that afternoon before talking to your group?"

Keeland felt the warmth stir in her as she remembered her last passionate moment with Leliana. How Leliana had whimpered and writhed underneath her, how she had cried in pleasure and pain, tears dampening her cheeks as the former warden had etched her touch into her.

"Leliana was... special to me." She started. "She showed me how to see things differently. She gave me a purpose. She made me laugh." She snorted and chuckled at the thought of the bard and how she would purse her lips disapprovingly at her when she teased her. "And she taught me hoe to trust again. Keep my faith."

"She must be very special to you. You speak of her with such passion." The blonde elf next to her said.

"She is... was... she taught me to listen to people and not let my temper get the best of me and she taught me not to be selfish."

"But you are being selfish. You're here so that you can have a clean conscious. That _is _selfish. If you weren't being selfish you would be there with her, showing her she's the one you love. Not me..." He waited a while longer for his words to sink in before he stood up and walked back to the camp of aravels.

She clenched her teeth sharpening the bow forcefully until frustration took over and she snapped it in half. "I am such an _idiot_!" Throwing the bow to the ground she raced after Tamlen.

"Tamlen!" she called out after him. She took two more steps before the ground trembled in an earth quaking shake sending her sprawling into the hair. She barely had time to react before the shouts alerted her to the incoming darkspawn horde. Standing up she changed her direction sprinting for their aravel where her Grey Warden amour lay alongside her swords.

Breaking the door open she threw the chest with her amour neatly placed in it open. She stared at it for a few seconds before throwing it back on smiling as she felt the excitement of the battle build within her. _This _was who she was. A great Dalish warrior. A Grey Warden.

TO BE CONTINUED...

* * *

**A/N:** Ha! Got your knickers in a twist with the last chapter, huh? ;)

Well, it seems Keeland has come to her senses. Question is, what happens next? Will she and the Dalish be able to defeat the darkspawn horde attacking them? And will the compains be able to forgive her this time? Will Leliana be able to? So many questions, so little time. ;)

Thanks ever so much for adding to favourites, subscribing, reading and reviewing.

You all make this so much more fun! I hope you enjoyed the chapter.

Till next time!

/Elm


	23. Love Hurts

**DISCLAIMER:** As we all know BioWare owns everything from Dragon Age: names, objects, places etc. Everything you do not recognize is mine though. ^^

This piece is only a display of my affection for this wonderful game. :)

**A.N:** There are a few things I want to say before I let you run off and read. ^^

Firstly, thank you to all of you who have reviewed, subscribed, and added me to your faves. It always makes me feel honoured that you take the time of your day to read and review my work.

Secondly, thank you everyone for your patience, and to those of you who have mailed me, and encouraged me during the past months. Thank you so much! My inspiration is back full on now so updates won't take as long. ;)

Thirdly, but definitely not the leastely – a huge thank you and big hug to _**LatentFI **_who's my new beta-reader and have been putting up with my dilly dallying the past month and a half. Thank you!

And about this chapter, I hope you enjoy it! Another one coming up soon. :)

Till next time!

~Elmjuniper

* * *

**LOVE HURTS**

SHE RUSHED TOWARDS THE MOB of hurlocks, screaming for the children and youngsters to run, her hands holding the sharpened swords flung out to her sides. Her brethren stormed towards the enemies next to her, their barbaric roar echoing through the dark Brecilian Forest as they clashed with the darkspawn, the blight's horde pouring across the hill, their distinctive stench filling her nostrils.

Keeland buried her blades into the first Alpha Hurlock to come her way, diving and rolling as another came charging towards her. Rolling on to her back as the Hurlock lunged towards her, daggers drawn she growled angrily and kicked her leg up, her chainmail boot connecting with its chest. It bounced backwards like a stone bouncing off a cliff. Getting back up on her feet Keeland barely had time to react before she heard the hissing sound of an arrow. Spinning on her heels she saw the hurlock clutch at it, as it dug itself deep into its chest.

Leather boots slapped against the ground and Tamlen came up next to her. "I bet you I can get at least three more of these blasted creatures than you!" He winked at her before taking off again, firing off his ironbark bow as he sprinted along.

She laughed and shook her head before bolting after him, the bloodlust gripping her once again. He might have the advantage of being an archer, but she was stronger and had the advantage of knowing how to kill these pesky little creatures a lot quicker than someone who hadn't been battling them for the past months.

Using her shield she ploughed through a group of rogue hurlocks, their bodies smashing hard against her metal shield. All around her the elves fought, slowly, but determinedly, to eliminate the horde of darkspawn swarming their encampment. The clanging of battle echoed throughout the gully and the fields were stained by the dark spawn's tainted blood, which mixed and mingled with the blood of the fallen elves, mirroring the blood red sky above them.

By dawn they had withstood the waves of darkspawn washing in upon them, wave by wave. Fatigued and weary they looked up from their weapons, gritting their teeth as they waited for the next wave of darkspawn to attack. Merrill's face was dirty and splattered with blood, her left shoulder temporarily bandaged, next to her stood the Keeper weaving her powerful magic, healing whomever she could while awaiting the darkspawn. Tamlen was looking pale and weary, though still smiling, his bow raised and aimed at the edge of the forest. Keeland's own amour was starting to feel heavy and her shield and swords felt as if they weighed more than an ox.

"What are they waiting for?" Merrill asked next to her.

"For us to give up." Tamlen muttered tiredly in response.

Keeland peered into the edge of the forest straining her ears listening for the sound of their brutal headway through the forest. There was nothing to be heard. Lowering her swords she started to walk up the hill towards the forest.

"What are you doing?" Tamlen shouted after her.

"Just checking. I think they've left..." She called across her shoulder, frowning slightly - the darkspawn giving up? Weren't they the never ending pain in her..?

The edge of the Brecilian Forest lay quiet and serene once again, the only traces of the darkspawn were the scattered corpses of their army. She was making her way down the little hill when an image shot in to her mind, causing her to fall to her knees.

The singing was overwhelming, a loud shrill sound filling her head and body with such longing to be near the archdemon. The voices were beautiful! The magnificent archdemon rose into the smoke-filled sky, spreading its wings wide and she watched in awe, the singing urging her to join them, pleading with her.

"Keeland!" The woman's voice penetrated her mind, bringing her out from the dreamlike vision.

"Leliana..." She mumbled smilingly as she saw the female leaning over her.

Merrill frowned. "Not quite. Why are you looking so happy? I thought you fainted."

"No, no... I..." She caught Tamlen's eyes. She could tell by the way he was looking at her that he knew what had happened to her.

"Wait a minute..." Merrill said slowly as if she was pondering something. "Do you hear that?"

Keeland turned her face to the side feeling the earth tremble and shake slightly underneath her. "They just don't give up..." She muttered as she got up and drew her swords, slowly advancing on to the top of the hill once again, closely followed by the elves. She could sense it before she felt it - the heavy thundering from the ogre's stampede towards them. It felt as if the whole world shook.

"What is that thing?" Finvarra asked in horror from where she stood next to Parlan.

"Your worst nightmare unless we stop it." Keeland answered before she bolted towards the grey ogre. She had only battled ogres a few times before, but that was with her... companions. She smiled at the thought of them. "It is your time to die." She mimicked Morrigan as the ogre leaned forward and pushed off the ground. Head first, horns as thick as an arm aiming for her.

Shooting off the ground, she somersaulted and landed to the side, jabbing her swords at its muscular flank. It swung its arms against her, hurling her backwards. She landed with an unpleasant crash, groaning loudly. Finvarra stood as if frozen, staring in horror at the beastly creature, when Merrill shoved her hard to the side.

"If you're not going to do anything at least get out of the way!" She yelled before firing off a spell at the ogre. It connected with a sizzling sound, drawing a loud roar from it.

Keeland rolled over, and heaved herself on to her feet. "Archers!" She shouted angrily at the impassiveness in front of her. As if they had been jolted back to life the elves were once again attacking their enemy, archers bombarding it with poisonous arrows, Merrill and the Keeper assaulting it with their spells. Merrill's dark hair falling in her face as she wore a resolute expression, working hard to keep her spells shooting out from her fingers, while Keeland and Parlan swung their swords at it. The elves who had been carrying their dead brothers and sisters now rushed towards the ogre unsheathing their weapons.

The ogre roared and shook furiously at the pesky little elves attacking it. Its thick horns caught three of the archers, flinging them aside as if they weighed no more than feathers. Keeland stumbled backwards again from the tremendous waves of world-shaking quakes the ogre caused when it banged its enormous fists into the ground. She was quickly back to stabbing at it with all her force, keeping it at bay as well as she could. She was racing towards it when its massive fist seemed to swing at her from out of nowhere, knocking the sense out of her. She lay on the ground, world spinning, screams and yells echoing all around her as she saw the ogre raise its hands, clasped together, above its head. They came surging towards her with such speed and force she could do nothing but close her eyes and shield herself instinctively with her small mailclad arms, even though she knew it would do no good. Then she felt the impact and her world went black.

.

.

The small group were even more resolute in the days after leaving Keeland with the elves, and even though they all stayed silent and pretended to be fine Leliana could see clearly that they were all in doubt. She had no doubt Alistair could feel it as well. He might be the heir to the king, but he was not yet ready to lead a group, not like this. For that he would need years of practice and a very good counsellor. Studying him she saw he could read what they were all thinking of him, she could see the insecurity, the sheer pressure he felt from being in charge. It was not hard to understand that Alistair, along with the rest of the group, had underestimated the responsibility their leader had carried for the past months. Keeland had made it all seem so easy, although the bard knew she had struggled many times. Sometimes she would wake up and find the elf sitting up, rubbing her temples in frustration when there was a certain problem worrying her, and she wouldn't lie down to sleep until the bard put her arms around her, forcing her to lie down. Then she would sigh a disheartened sigh and mumble something in elvish before closing her eyes.

Leliana smiled to herself. She had loved those nights where she got to pull the elf into her arms, twisting strings of her silky, brown hair around her fingers as she let her nose rest on the spot behind the elf's ear that Keeland secretly loved. Eventually the elf would fall asleep, a contented smile on her face, and Leliana would study the sharp jaw line relax, her eyes flickering behind closed eyelids. The bard knew it was silly, but she missed that the most, the closeness, the serenity that cloaked them in the tent during the nights, just the two of them out of the crossfire of battle, away from the companions' prying eyes. The bard sighed heavily where she walked. The thought of their former leader, her love, still hurt like a dull aching pain in her chest, sometimes intensifying until she sank to her knees gasping for air, weeping uncontrollably into her hands.

It had been a week since they left Keeland, and still her skin felt as if the elf's touch still burned on it. At first she had cried, then the shock and the numbness had hit her full on, leaving her listless and quiet. She let another sigh slip across her lips. It wasn't so bad, not when the others were around her. Then she could focus on keeping them safe, scouting the area, making small talk to Wynne who looked at her with concern, although this far she had managed to dodge the conversation she knew Wynne wanted to have with her. Then came the nights, and the longing and emptiness crashed over her like the weight of a thousand heavy boulders, and she could do no more than twist and turn in her bedroll trying to shake the anxiety off. She didn't cry as much anymore. At times she thought that she had no more tears to shed, she had shed too many over the years. Over her mother's lifeless pale body, over poor old Cecilie who died in her sleep, over the pain Marjolaine inflicted on her, over the men and women she had manipulated, over the feelings of shame and filth the guards of Orlais had etched into her body, over the loneliness in the Chantry, and now... over Keeland.

"Leliana. " She heard the soft voice of the mage ask for her attention.

She turned around to Wynne smiling weakly. "Yes?"

"How are you holding up?" The mage asked with genuine concern.

"I am fine thank you Wynne... it's not so bad, she will... is... Keeland..." The words got caught in her throat as she realized she had been mostly talking to herself, and when speaking about Keeland with others, the terrible emptiness she had left, the pain and hurt, seemed to intensify by tenfold and Leliana felt the hot tears caress her rosy cheeks.

Wynne placed her arm round the bard's sleek, thin shoulders, pulling her into a warm, motherly hug. "It's alright child. Shh..." She soothed the bard, putting her wise, old hand on the bard's head as she seemed to be crashing into the mage's compassion, burying her hands in her face, leaning her head onto Wynne's shoulder.

The rest of the group turned around watching them, and Wynne motioned for them that perhaps it was best to set up camp. They had already fallen behind and it would not do having the weak and fragile bard travelling much further in this state. She needed rest and food. Leliana could hear all this happening around her and she wanted to protest, to tell them she was fine, but pride seemed to have evaporated and she remained hidden within the mage's embrace.

"Ah child..." Wynne said in her characteristically wise voice, and Leliana felt herself placed on to the mossy soft ground. "You know, they always make it out to seem as if love should be easy and, when we are young and sometimes even as we grow older, we are fools to believe that that is how it is. Love is never easy. It is easy at first, when everything is new, but it is when you decide to give it a go it gets hard."

"Too hard, I'm too tired... and it hurts." Leliana said quietly, now staring at her hands.

The mage chuckled. "Yes... yes, love does hurt, when you do it right, when you really love, then it hurts. More than having werewolves clawing at you..."

Leliana looked up at the mage and saw something flicker by in her pale, grey eyes. "What happened?" she asked carefully.

Wynne smiled, this time a sad smile. "The Circle of Magi happened."

The bard was overwhelmed by impulse, and hugged the older woman who never seemed to complain and, much like Keeland, put everything and everyone else before herself. Wynne chuckled at her amiable display, patting the bard's arm with her hand as she leaned her head onto the younger woman's.

"Love hurts Leliana, but you are young. There is time to cry when you get older, but now we must focus on the blight." She pressed just enough to get the bard thinking, but not too much so as to upset her and make her feel as if her feelings had been belittled.

"How come you never let your emotions get the better of you?" Leliana mumbled.

"Oh, who said I never did? I was quite the fiery young lady once, but along the years I learnt that a good spell..." She flicked her hand and Leliana saw the blonde assassin stumble and crash into Morrigan who fell over with a loud, disapproving cry, the suave assassin landing on top of her, smiling broadly. "...can always get you in a better mood."

Leliana giggled and sat up looking at Wynne. "I didn't know you had it in you."

Wynne chuckled. "They never do."

**TO BE CONTINUED...**


End file.
